Funniest/Most Insightful Comments Of The Week At Techdirt

from the doj,-fcc,-fml dept

This week, both our top comments on the insightful side came in response to the DOJ's attack on Trump protestors, accusing them of "hiding behind the First Amendment". Robert L won first place for responding to that absurd notion:

You don't hide behind the first amendment...

You jump on top of that bitch and shout loudly "This is my fucking constitutionally protected right!"

Another extremely concerning part of the DOJ's arguments was the idea that knowing something about police tactics during protests implied guilt. An anonymous commenter won second place with a very appropriate reaction:

What bothers me more about this, is that the DOJ prosecutor seems to be saying that you need to be ignorant in order to be innocent. That's truly unsettling.

This anti-intellectualism movement is deeply troubling.

For editor's choice on the insightful side, we've got a pair of responses to the creator of PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds making some quite ridiculous statements about copycats and intellectual property. TheResidentSkeptic elegantly summed up the general attitude:

Interesting point of view...

*I* was "inspired" by those that came before me; all those who came after me are just ripping me off...

Shortly after, Ben offered a reply that could just as easily go on the funny side but, hey, it's only funny because it's true:

I think that is called "The Disney Perspective"

Over on the funny side, we start out on our post about the many architects of the internet speaking out against the FCC's net neutrality repeal, where one commenter presented an extremely bizarre and confusing list of reasons that they are all apparently compromised and not to be trusted. Roger Strong won first place by holding a mirror up to the crazy:

The wheel. Used later by the MILITARY!

Cutlery. Used by staff at the CIA!

Pants. Used for spying, because RFID tags can be sewn into them!

Don't trust anyone who uses them!

/s

For second place, we loop back to the DOJ's fearmongering over people knowing something as simple as the term "kettling", where Oblate pointed out something of a catch-22 in this news:

I have obtained illegal knowledge

Great, now I know that term too. Should I wait here for the riot police and federal charges, or is there an official tazing/surrender location?

For editor's choice on the funny side, we've got a pair of comments regarding the recent unfortunate events around net neutrality. First, it's Toom1275 giving the FCC a pat on the back as the death of net neutrality loomed:

As the deadline draws near, at least NN opponents can take comfort knowing that their perfect streak of never once providing a truthful argument to support their position is in no danger whatsoever of being broken.

And finally, we've got an anonymous reaction to the evidence that not just some but most of the anti-net-neutrality comments submitted to the FCC were fake:

In totally unrelated news, Verizon announced today that its next round of infrastructure investment would extend service to over two million new subscribers, all over the United States, in alphabetical order. Many, perhaps most, of these subscribers, the spokesperson emphasized, are still alive.

That's all for this week, folks!

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  • identicon
    David, 17 Dec 2017 @ 1:07pm

    Missing crucial information

    In totally unrelated news, Verizon announced today that its next round of infrastructure investment would extend service to over two million new subscribers, all over the United States, in alphabetical order. Many, perhaps most, of these subscribers, the spokesperson emphasized, are still alive.

    Will that also be the case by the time the service arrives?

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    David, 17 Dec 2017 @ 3:29pm

    Corollary

    What bothers me more about this, is that the DOJ prosecutor seems to be saying that you need to be ignorant in order to be innocent.

    Then wouldn't Ajit Pai be the second coming of Christ because of his unprecedented level of innocence? If the second coming of Christ is the Antichrist, does that mean that Christianity is an unbiased religion?

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Bergman (profile), 18 Dec 2017 @ 1:50am

      Re: Corollary

      Actually, it's a little more complex than that. The Anti-Christ will be mistaken for the second coming, then the real second coming will curbstomp him.

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    McKay Salisbury, 17 Dec 2017 @ 8:39pm

    Maybe what Trump meant by "drain the swamp" is that with the water gone, the alligators in the swamp will have nowhere to go besides people's tubs and swimming pools. #savenetneutraility #bringbacktheswamp

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • This comment has been flagged by the community. Click here to show it
    identicon
    apotekdewasa, 18 Dec 2017 @ 12:30am

    Jual Titan Gel Asli Jakarta

    Thanks To Information

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]


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