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Nobody Thinks Online Dating Is A Substitute For The Real Thing
from the finding-a-first-date dept
Unlike Brad Stone at the Times tech blog, I think webcam-based speed dating is a promising idea, and if I were single I'd probably try it out. Stone points out two objections to the concept, neither of which seems especially compelling. One is that "for a certain demented kind of person, live Web cameras are an invitation for nudity and public displays of self-affection." That doesn't strike me as a very serious obstacle, though. For one thing, as any woman who's tried old fashioned online dating (is online dating old enough to be called "old-fashioned" yet?) will tell you, men already send women inappropriate pictures of themselves using traditional personals sites. Secondly, this kind of abuse should be pretty easy to deter by asking for contact information, perhaps verified with a credit card. Few men are likely to expose themselves on a site that's keeping a video recording of the conversation and has their contact information on file. The other objection is that "brief, Web-brokered Internet chat sessions might not be the best gauge of whether an enduring connection is possible." But that objection applies to any online dating service—yet lots of people find Internet dating useful. The point of online dating services (and real-life "speed dating" services, which have also become popular) isn't to decide who to marry, and it's never been a substitute for more traditional dates. The point is to help you efficiently find people who seem worth the time and expense of a first date. If a service like this helps you avoid a date where the girl stares at her plate and mumbles to herself the whole meal, that seems like time and money well spent.
Timothy Lee is an expert at the Insight Community. To get insight and analysis from Timothy Lee and other experts on challenges your company faces, click here.
Reader Comments
(Flattened / Threaded)
Punishing the Wrongdoers
People think the net is a "safe" place to act greedy, immoral. In return, I enjoy torturing the gold diggers, perverts, etc. in ways I wouldn't do in real life. I've read books on police interviewing tactics to use their own words against them. Of course, I've also been able to find sincere people this way also -- I've never been disappointed.
I've had plenty of success in meeting normal, respectable women online. My current girlfriend will be spending Thanksgiving with me.
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Long Term Relationship
Everyone knows your suppose to find your wife in a bar, not online.
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Square Dance
I met Mrs. Potter at a Square dance. There is nothing like a good "caller" to warm up the ladies.
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Ummm, send those women to me
I'd like to meet a few women that spend dinner staring at their plate and mumbling to themselves. I never have any luck with any of the others, they're too busy flirting with guys from other tables and accepting drinks. Maybe a couple of those girls you mention would end up being shy, self-conscious, introverted, sweethearts just like me.
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Re: Ummm, send those women to me
Unfortunately for said women, it seems that 99.9999% of men who describe themselves as "shy, self-conscious, introverted, sweethearts" are, in actuality, self-absorbed, dependent pussies with a victim complex. Perhaps you're one in a million, but with odds like that, you probably aren't.
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I actually met my guy online...
Good ole' fashioned Yahoo! Personals too. His opening line was talking about his tattoo and I was intrigued. After a few hours we realized we went to the same high school and graduated the same year, but hung around with different crowds so we just never crossed paths. That was about four years ago and we are still doing well. And he never sent me any inappropriate pictures.
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"Few men are likely to expose themselves on a site that's keeping a video recording of the conversation..."
What kind of crazy fucking loon would, male or female, unless they're some kind of exhibitionist?
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There's a time and place for everything and that place is college.
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Re:
.....and that time is when you're teaching the girls volleyball team.
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There is huge value in the visual. Who wants to show up to a date only to find a cow waiting for you?
Nice to know the yabo's are up to speed and the person you meet didn't need a wide angle web cam.
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I met my wife online
I met my wife through an online dating service. We're coming up on our third anniversary in a few months. :)
Of course I should mention that my wife is an immigrant and our first date took place in Beijing. (and all I can say is, if you like Peking duck, go to the source!)
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Web dating worked for me. I was working nights then, and didn't like the bar scene. Met my wife online through Yahoo Personals, found that we had a mutual friend and met there. We just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary.
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I do
I think it is!
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well..
I have to say that I've met a girlfriend or two through dating sites and I saw enough success to start my own local dating site. My mother-in-law met her current borefriend through Match..though HE will be the one getting the surprise since I'm betting she can't "hide the crazy" long enough to get him in a relationship; she's one of the few that I've ever met that can take a 15 year relationship, drop it without a second thought and be moving full forward to snag another sucker in under 2 weeks.
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