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Too Much Free Time

by Mike Masnick

Tue, Mar 9th 2010 10:16am


Filed Under:
babies, lawsuits, lindsay lohan

Companies:
etrade



Lindsay Lohan Sues E*Trade For $100 Million; Says Baby Was Based On Her

from the well,-who's-a-baby-now dept

If you thought the guy suing because he thought Hurt Locker was based on his life story (but also made him look bad) was going too far, here's an even more ridiculous lawsuit. Dave Barnes was the first of a few of you to alert us to the news that actress Lindsay Lohan is suing E*Trade for $100 million, claiming that one of the babies used in its famous "talking babies" commercials was based on her. The baby -- which was named Lindsay -- is shown as being a "boyfriend-stealing, milkaholic" baby. And, for that, Lindsay say she deserves $100 million in "pain and suffering." I'm trying to decide which makes someone seem more like a baby: a commercial with a silly "milkaholic" baby, or a humorless multi-millionaire starlet suing a financial firm for $100 million over a silly commercial that has talking babies, because she can't take a joke.
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  • icon
    Jon Renaut (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:18am

    If she admits it . . .

    If she will publicly admit that she has questionable morals, a substance abuse problem, and difficulty comprehending English, I think she deserves to get paid.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:20am

    So is the purpose of the lawsuit to confirm that they were correct in casting her as a baby?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymouse, 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:21am

    I think by suing she is confirming that she is indeed a baby boyfriend stealing milkoholic.... with bad hair.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Avatar28 (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:34am

      Re:

      Are we sure she might not be a GIRLfriend-stealing milkaholic? Just sayin' she's apparently shown some tendencies like that before apparently.

      But, yeah, saying that the baby is based on her is tantamount to admitting to that. I wonder if she is willing to go to court and testify under oath that that baby is like her. I'm PRETTY certain that a single name isn't enough to establish a factual basis under the law. Otherwise you would never a see a John, Tom, Robert or other similarly common names.

      [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

      • icon
        vivaelamor (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 3:14pm

        Re: Re:

        "Are we sure she might not be a GIRLfriend-stealing milkaholic? Just sayin' she's apparently shown some tendencies like that before apparently."

        Is there such thing as passive-aggressive homophobia? Just sayin'.

        [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:23am

    Well, if the baby also happens to be a whore then . . . .

    If the baby shoe fits?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    ChurchHatesTucker (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:24am

    Wait, What?

    Is she, or is she not a milkaholic? Also, is there anyone else in the world with that first name?

    Seriously, lawyers should be disbarred after filing crap like this.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    crade (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:28am

    The U.S. is all about ridiculous lawsuits. It's a better chance than the lottery.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    davebarnes (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:29am

    I would say that Lindsay would have a case

    if the E-trade commercial referred to a "coke addict" or an "alcoholic". But, sadly, it did not.

    Also, I really doubt that Lindsay Lohan is "a humorless multi-millionaire starlet". Many people think that she is close to being broke.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      kryptonianjorel (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:07am

      Re: I would say that Lindsay would have a case

      I'd be willing to put money on the fact that Lohan isn't the only alcoholic, boyfriend-stealing Lindsay out there.

      Its a money grab. Like you said, Lohan is pooooooooor. Shes spent up the little money she had, and is now trying to get set for life.

      [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      nasch (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:38am

      Re: I would say that Lindsay would have a case

      I would say that Lindsay would have a case if the E-trade commercial referred to a "coke addict" or an "alcoholic".

      Please tell me you're being sarcastic.

      [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      xanius, 9 Mar 2010 @ 2:01pm

      Re: I would say that Lindsay would have a case

      Yeah, cocaine will do that to you.

      [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Catherine jennifer fusco, 10 Mar 2010 @ 4:11am

      Re: I would say that Lindsay would have a case

      davebarnes..this is a contradiction,first you saiud you doubt Linsay is a humorless multi-millionaire starlet."then" you say..Many people think that she is close to being broke? "I DOUBT" she's anything but a spoiled[understatement] brat,devoid of morality,intellect,boring,uncultured,cluttered,lazy,plus the fact that a simple detox of pills& Booze,entitled her to a posh retreat at $1000$ daily[=30Grand/month]to canoe,pedi-CURES,maniCures,hair,etc..I wish "I" could detox surrounded by the finer things {I'm accustomed to also],but my addiction is a tad more painfull,I deserve to have the quality of "my" life returned in such a way!Sheen also needed a 60's style kick-ib-the-ass..Lindsay "just wants!,what heve the both of them done for humanity lately? She does nothing to help save the wolves,nor participate in the seal slaughtering,or any other cause..Her mother[role reversal.likened to this generation] is also never geard from,she's not a good mother,just a rich one,so her "[non] work is done,as mommy has never struggled a day in her life..wasn't raised w/ traditional values,nor books,nor culture!A beautiful girl like Brittany Murphy dies a senseless death,while Lohan has too much time watching tv,thinking she's entitled to the slightest inuendo,depicting her classless persona!Multi-millioaire?What,the royalties?Certainly,not working nor looking for any parts! She& whatever lawer she has,no doubt a servant for her whimsical idea's- that all eyes are on her]must be passifying her..When was the last time she was heard..giving to a cause? Speaking out?You said you Doubted she is humorless,but left us there,if she not humorless,why isn't she laughing,where is her mother? Perhaps her father does have some legitimate reasons while Lohan claims my father tries to make $$$ from my name..what "name" would that be...skinny tramp who wraps up a $300 thousand car,[where if it were us,our hearts would be beating out of our chest!][to have an accident with our less costly car!]Brittany Spears is another dud who was raised like a slob..you can't take the slob out of the girl,nor can she attain anything anything "stellar",she's waste,who will loose this "indulgent lawsuit"& the crook who will try to persue it!

      [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    thublihnk (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:33am

    Wait, Lindsay Lohan thinks she was the first boyfriend robbing milkaholic baby on the scene?

    "You're so vain, you prob'ly think the song is about you..."

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Seth (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:39am

    Staying Relevant

    I think she's just trying to keep her name in the news to avoid completely fading into obscurity. Why not try to get paid while you are at it.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    mike42 (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:42am

    Parody

    If it was based on her, wouldn't it be protected as a "Parody"?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    bob, 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:56am

    I hope this goes all the way

    Then she loses and has to pay for all the legal work.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Thomas (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:57am

    typical..

    If you can't earn money by working, get money by suing someone. I saw the commercial and never thought of her. what about other people named Lindsay? Surely she is not the only worman in the world named Lindsay?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:58am

    I want to see this go to court. She'll have to say, duly recorded into the court transcripts, that she's an alcoholic dumbass with questionable morals.

    I would pay good money for an illustrated copy of that transcript. Preferably with caricatures of the proceedings.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Bradley Stewart, 9 Mar 2010 @ 10:59am

    Anything For Publicity

    I have a better chance of jumping off a really big trampoline and landing on the moon than this girl has a chance of collecting anything.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:03am

    How much did Etrade pay Lindsay for this free advertising?
    ;)

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Mark Harrill (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:07am

    Before

    Before this lawsuit I saw the commercial and didn't even associate it with Ms. Lohan. Now I will...forever. Is this like the Streisand Effect but for making something about you when it isn't? Call it the Lohan Corollary?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:10am

    Would that make her a pedophile?

    Is she really that into having her baby man?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anony1, 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:12am

    First, I think the commercial in question is in extremely poor taste. Tactless, and not that funny. At all. Second, when I saw said commercial, I never, for a split second, associated the baby with Ms. Lohan. In fact, I'm not even sure it's established that it was meant to represent her. She may have seen a connection, due to her well pulicized substance-abuse issues, but I didn't at the time. Didn't even remember the baby's name. So even if it were based on her, she's well..plumb loco.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:17am

    Next headline will be... "Class Action Lawsuit Against E*Trade by Everyone Named Lindsay"

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    FormerAC (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:18am

    Lindsay

    As if Lindsay Lohan wasn't already a joke.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    btr1701 (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:24am

    Lohan

    > because she can't take a joke

    Which assumes the ad was about her in the first place. There's no evidence of that whatsoever. Hell, given that the name was only spoken on screen, there's no way Lohan can even know it's "Lindsay" and not "Lindsey" or "Lindsy". E-Trade also said in its response that Lindsay was the name of someone on their creative team, which was why it was chosen. They wouldn't make such an easily disprovable claim if it wasn't true, which puts an even higher legal hurdle in front of Lohan.

    And in any event, even if the baby *was* based on Lohan, parody of public figures is protected speech and a well-established exception to intellectual property restrictions and the fact that the person doing the parodying is making a profit at the same time is irrelevant.

    Seems like this is just a ploy by a trainwreck of a B-list starlet who did such a thorough job of wrecking her once-promising career that she's been reduced to filing bogus lawsuits for publicity.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    33Degrees, 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:26am

    Lindsay Who?

    I know who the babies are, but who is Lindsay?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Baby Agent, 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:33am

    Baby Sues Lindsay`

    So, the real suit is between Lindsey (the baby in diapers, not the one without panties)and her agent if the poor little thing had to portray such a loser as her first role!

    Besides, panty-less Lindsay may be an alcoholic, but I had no idea she was also a milkaholic! Wow, learn something new every day!

    ~33

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    TS.Atomic (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:42am

    Makes no sense!

    So, this is a satire piece, right? That's it, isn't it! It's some goofy satire article -or- some sort of weird internet study or experiment put out by an undergrad to poll reactions for (heckifIknow) studies...

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 11:58am

    Oh Crap

    We we're planning on naming our baby girl Lindsay. Better pick something else incase later in live her name was to appear in the media and the real, original and only Lindsay would sue use and her.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    vastrightwing, 9 Mar 2010 @ 12:05pm

    Connections

    Lindsay Lohan -> Money -> Big financial firm -> baby -> Lindsay Lohan is a spoiled brat.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Cathy, 9 Mar 2010 @ 12:10pm

    Now E-Trade is countersuing Lindsay: http://bit.ly/a0Xh8j

    But that's what you get when you file frivolous lawsuits...

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Blah1234, 9 Mar 2010 @ 12:23pm

    Looking for Attention

    Mike, I really wish you wouldn't post stuff like this. This is obviously a case where she (or her PR rep) are looking for attention. She gets back in the news and every time that commercial comes on the air, people will think of her. I just wish you wouldn't feed this cycle.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Charlie Potatoes (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 12:29pm

    The beat goes on...

    Years ago the cartoonist Al Capp (Lil Abner) introduced a new character, a folk singer, who rode around in a limo to sing about poverty and hunger. He named her Joanie Phony. Joan Baez, in righteous indignation, sued him. I recall that he apologized on the Johnny Carson show, saying he was indeed sorry that Miss Baez believed she might be Joanie Phony. She looked like an idiot.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Alan Gerow (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 1:02pm

    So is she saying she's a cradle robber?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 1:48pm

    Lindsay needs to lay off the moo-juice. All that vitamin Ds gone straight to her head

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 2:00pm

    BLAME TWITTER!!!

    http://adage.com/article?article_id=142711

    Indeed, a lot of people were talking about it on Twitter in the aftermath of the spot's airing -- with many egging Ms. Lohan on to file a lawsuit against E-Trade. Wrote someone named Ryan Curtis: "@lindsaylohan I would sue if I was you," and later saying "@lindsaylohan I really think you should look into it. It wasn't funny and rude."

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Probably Sucks, 9 Mar 2010 @ 2:25pm

    Humourless?

    "humorless multi-millionaire starlet", I think, "humorless, slutty and former multi-millionaire starlet who is close to being broke because nobody wants her any more" is a closer fitting statement.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Paul`, 9 Mar 2010 @ 2:43pm

    I hope they counter claim for legal costs. That would be too perfect.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    AllRise, 9 Mar 2010 @ 2:45pm

    Lindsay Lohan VS. E-trade

    The Lindsay Lohan VS. E-trade case is now open at AllRise online court. Join the debate and cast your vote - http://bit.ly/AllRise288

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    C L, 9 Mar 2010 @ 3:45pm

    Lindsay Who?

    Really? Sorry...when I hear just the name Lindsay......I NEVER think of Lindsay Lohan.

    *Some*body is needing attention....

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    C L, 9 Mar 2010 @ 3:45pm

    Lindsay Who?

    Really? Sorry...when I hear just the name Lindsay......I NEVER think of Lindsay Lohan.

    *Some*body is needing attention....

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      vyvyan, 9 Mar 2010 @ 7:56pm

      Re: Lindsay Who?

      I first think of Davenport. She can pick Lohan with one hand and throw her in pacific ocean, then Lohan can sue the water for being cold.

      [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Monkeyboy (profile), 10 Mar 2010 @ 6:21am

      Re: Lindsay Who?

      Exactly! Since when is Lindsay Lohan on a one name basis like she seems to claim? She is no Madonna or Oprah.

      [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 9 Mar 2010 @ 5:02pm

    I honestly would never have drawn that parallel had she not made it herself. Sounds like a self-made case for "if the shoe fits, wear it".

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    B's Opinion Only (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 9:16pm

    Ha ha, awesome! I worked on that commercial!

    I can assure you that Lindsay Lohan was not on our minds while shooting. We were mostly concerned with which talent would sit still under the lights without screaming and give us something that we could use between crying fits (which is probably a lot like working with Ms. Lohan, come to think of it.)

    Thank jebus I am low enough on the call sheet to not have to worry about milkoholics filing lawsuits.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Chris Maresca (profile), 9 Mar 2010 @ 9:33pm

    Funny enough....

    ... Etrade's stock was up today. Perhaps she could sue GE as well?

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Monkeyboy (profile), 10 Mar 2010 @ 5:54am

    No idea

    When I first read an article about this elsewhere, I thought for sure it had to be some kind of parody post. I never in my wildest dreams imagined that the Lindsay baby was based off of her. Now thanks to her lawsuit, that's all I'll think about whenever I see this commercial! Thanks, Streisand Effect!

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Sandra, 10 Mar 2010 @ 6:45am

    LINDSAY CASE

    I think Lindsay Lohan needs to get a life and get a grip!! Just like everyone else, I had not one time thought about the E*Trade Lindsay baby being based on Lidsay Lohan when I saw that commercial. Not until this lawsuit. I really like that commercial and all of the E*Trade baby commercials and I hope that the Judge throws Lindsay Lohan out of his court room!

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    jsf (profile), 10 Mar 2010 @ 9:01am

    I'd be willing to bet that she never even saw the commercial and the whole thing started when some lawyer looking to make a buck mentioned it.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    davebarnes (profile), 10 Mar 2010 @ 10:23am

    It gets better

    "I'm just basically glad I took a stand. I'm not going to let them do this to us anymore," Dina Lohan said of the "horrible" and "mean" ad.

    She said that the ad was clearly aimed at her daughter because unlike other stars, her daughter's first name is synonymous with the "Herbie Fully Loaded" actress.

    "Everyone knows Lindsay, like Cher or Madonna," Dina Lohan said.

    Read more: http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/lindsay_super_bawl_time_out_2wZQWjTEKUokiMAmr0jNIL#ixzz0hncULu od

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 10 Mar 2010 @ 2:08pm

    http://gawker.com/5490294/does-lindsay-lohan-even-know-that-shes-suing-etrade

    Ovadia didn't return a phone call and e-mail asking how she got involved in the case and whether she'd ever spoken to Lindsay Lohan about it. And we don't really know where to go to ask someone from Lindsay's side about it, considering the fact that her long-time publicist is on a "hiatus." Her mother Dina Lohan told the New York Post today that Lindsay was outraged by the ad, adding, in a telling use of the first person, "I'm just basically glad I took a stand." And to to complete the circle, Radar Online quoted Michael Lohan just two days ago saying that he and his ex-wife had reconnected and were "crying to each other" on the phone after he took a heart-related trip to the hospital.

    A cynic might suspect that Lindsay's money-grubbing parents recently started talking again and hatched a plan to attach their daughter's name to a bullshit lawsuit filed by a provincial lawyer that one of them knows. But we can't imagine what sort of parents would treat their daughter that way.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    StarNoStar, 11 Mar 2010 @ 3:08pm

    What A Waste...

    What a joke!

    She needs to grow up and realize that the world does not revolve around her. Now how much money is the court system gonna waste on a case like this, millions? Where could that money be better spent? Maybe trying legit cases (not PR stunts), or maybe put it toward the national debt, maybe invest it in drug recovery programs, i could think of a million way to better our society with the cash spent on this case.

    Does anyone here realize that you guys are paying for this court case with your tax dollars? Yup, she figured out a way to make YOU pay for the brunt of her PR stunt.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Linsday FAn, 26 Mar 2010 @ 10:53am

    Lindsay is Hot

    you are all against Lindsay because she is hot and you are not. Give her $200 million and forget about it.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]


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