Iran's FARS: Snowden Documents Finally Detail That The US Government Is Run By Aliens

from the truth-is-out-there dept

Edward Snowden’s leaks have offered much in the way of revelation. Each story seems to broaden our understanding of exactly how widespread the government surveillance efforts have gone. They have caused many Americans to rethink their stance on their own government. They’ve painted several public employees, including those holding the highest offices in the nation, as inhuman power-mongers. And, according to Iran’s semi-official FARS news agency, there may be a reason for that.

FARS is reporting that the latest revelation from the Snowden documents is that the American government is actually run by a race of aliens known as “Tall Whites,” who have engineered everything in recent history, most notably the rise of Hitler, because all alien intergalactic roads lead back to Hitler.

Pictured: a Tall White

And, no, I’m not making any of this up or exaggerating any of this. That distinction belongs to the website, best known as being generally insane and specifically crackpot-conspiracy-theory-ish. Prior to FARS deciding that this was, like, totally legit, that website was the only source for this revelation that has FARS stating:

A stunning Federal Security Services (FSB) report on the nearly two million highly classified top-secret documents obtained from the United States Department of Defense (DOD) run National Security Agency-Central Security Service (NSA/CSS) by the American ex-patriot Edward Snowden states that this information is providing “incontrovertible proof” that an “alien/extraterrestrial intelligence agenda” is driving US domestic and international policy, and has been doing so since at least 1945.

They further state that the only reason you haven’t heard of these “Tall Whites” running the American government is because they have instituted a global network designed to shut down any information sources about them. Apparently, the FARS news agency and WhatDoesThisMean are somehow out of the reach of these alien masterminds.

Thanks for the laugh, FARS. In the future, if you could just go ahead and return to falling for “news stories” from The Onion, that’d be great.

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Comments on “Iran's FARS: Snowden Documents Finally Detail That The US Government Is Run By Aliens”

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trinsic says:

Re: Re:

The worse the social/political climate gets, the more criticism is direct toward people and ideas outside established view points.

There is a little known saying among a small minority of people with truly open minds, “Truth is stranger than Fiction”

Keep it up, it only increases your own self-inflated importance. Which furthers you from contemplating your existence.

Alien Rebel (profile) says:

Re: Re: Dopey Earthlings

I did illustration work for a game developer, had a nice relationship with them until they sent a new contract written by the tall whites. They demanded ownership of ALL WORK created by me while I was engaged with them, unless I declared what was not to be their property and submitted samples. No need for additional proof that aliens are indeed taking over.

An actual girl says:

Don't blame me -- I just catalogue the craziness

Yeah, the original article isn’t serious. However, does everyone know that 500+ (former and current) military personnel, intelligence services workers, and defense employees have decided to go on the record regarding their dealings, in the course of their professional duties, with: UFOs; apparently alien technologies including crashed spacecraft; recovered humanoid but not human bodies; and various practices for keeping the public unaware of this information including manipulation of photographic evidence?

I don’t find this topic extraordinarily comforting, and I’m quite sure that most of us have no clue WTH they’re actually up to.

Anonymous Coward says:

Re: Don't blame me -- I just catalogue the craziness

What the ones I met are “up to” is monitoring the planet that they “terraformed” (such sweet irony) some 4 billion years ago by stationing the Moon (the combination of the Moon’s mass and its orbit limits the peturbations of the Earth such that the Earth’s magnetosphere is always broadside to the Solar Wind. This in its turn both stops the atmosphere from being blasted away and prevents life from being exterminated by high-energy protons.)

I’m not entirely sure where that leaves us except to say that you’re very right to feel uncomfortable about it.

Anonymous Coward says:

Re: Re: Don't blame me -- I just catalogue the craziness

By the way, peturbations are changes in the Obliquity of the Ecliptic, or variations of the dihedral angle between the Axis of Rotation of the Earth and the plane of the Earth’s orbit around the Sun (the ‘Ecliptic’). The Earth’s Obliquity varies only between ~20 and ~25 degrees over a cyclical period of some 41,000 years.

An actual girl says:

Re: Re: Don't blame me -- I just catalogue the craziness

Really — I didn’t get the hell astroturfed out of me on my first comment here ever?! That’s fantastic!

I’ve also gotten a wicked story or two from friends who’ve been behind the “classified information” curtain. If any of this was true (imminent earth changes, aliens coming to live among us…), it would be devastating. And if it’s just more disinfo to confuse and control people, that’s so damn sinister I don’t know where to start. Why tell defense contractors these things? What kind of psychopaths are in charge anyhow?

Unless you’re saying aliens told you this rather than insiders, in which case, I stand teased.

steell (profile) says:

Re: Don't blame me -- I just catalogue the craziness

I hope that doesn’t include the dozens of reports I made during my time in the USAF. I was just trying to show that no one read the reports anyway. No one ever said anything about all the ridiculous reports I filed, so apparently I was right, no one ever did read them.

Manic Pedantic says:

Timmy still can't get his "facts" right.

And, no, I’m not making any of this up or exaggerating any of this. That distinction belongs to the website, best known as being generally insane and specifically crackpot-conspiracy-theory-ish.


for the lowdown on the highbrow subject of conspiracy theories.

As an aside, there are many people involved in many different conspiracies and there are just as many who appear to be involved and are only acting out in self-interest. Just as there are many who haven’t a clue about what is happening around them, there are many who cannot tell the difference between a real conspiracy and what has happened in someone’s drug-induced nightmare. As they say, don’t attribute to intelligent conspiracy when it is just self-interested stupidity. As our in-house “conspiracy theory” analyst (Dark Helmet) will attest to.

We only need to look as far as the FBI, CIA, DEA, NSA, etc, for evidence of people running their own little conspiracies because they believe that everyone else is involved in various nefarious conspiracies.

Anonymous Coward says:

Obama said he promises “things will change” and the NSA will no longer bug world leaders mobile phones…

ALL Change, because he also signed an order so the CIA will do it instead AND adds bugging their houses, their assistants houses and other ‘appropriate’ buildings……technically he didn’t lie to the public but nothing changes and just gets worse

Anonymous Coward says:

FARS (which receives partial funding from the US as a ‘semi-official’ Iranian news source) was asked by the US goverment to run this crap btw.
Its all FUD so that when Snowden leaks the REALLY serious stuff (assassinations, concentration camps for anti-government ‘undesirables’) it’ll be lumped in with aliens/ghosts/telepathy etc as a pile of crap.

steve ellis says:

Tall Whites

The Tall Whites do exist, they have there main base which is 5,000 Square miles in area 53. They have 2 agreements which were made back in 1955 with the US Government 1. technology transfer agreement and 2. earth resource extraction agreement.
For more information watch Mr Charles Hall Interview for 1hr 26mins on youtube and watch it all carefully. also go on google earth after and you can view the the tall whites scout craft and main landing areas in dog bone lake. The Main technology handed over the last 30 years was communication systems but the Tall Whites are a selfish race and will not do anything unless its in there favour. FARS News have not got it quite correct but they have opened the can. The Tall Whites goal is to integrate in human society officially in 20 years from now with a 1 world government. We will loose our freedom. Do your homework into this and as you dig deeper , you will find a lot more that I have not given out above. Regards Steve UK

steve ellis says:

Barack Obama

There is one more point. Barack Obama was never informed of the under government with the Tall Whites. He had No KNOWLEDGE of this just as he had NO knowledge of the NSA using this Technology for world Mapping and survellance on all world leaders 24hrs a day.
Obama now has been briefed over the last 4 months about the whistleblower SNOWDEN of the information he has leaked to the world. Obama has made in certain words an apology to Merkel and ALL other world Leaders and branded Snowden a traitor to his country. Obama has now been briefed on the Tall Whites and Hopefully he will get the full agenda . I hope Obama starts a move against the The World Plan of 1 Government and integration of the Tall Whites.

Rgds Steve UK

Christa (user link) says:

Disclosure Time!

My husband and I were shocked when we saw this article as it lines up so well his new book “The Anunnaki of Nibiru: Mankinds Forgotten Creators, Enslavers, Destroyers, Saviors and Hidden Architects of the New World Order” where he mentions Paul Hellyer the “Tall Whites” and so much more! Found on!

Pragmatic says:

So much crazy… I suspect that the comment about trying to discredit Snowden by getting him linked with the tinfoil hatters may have some basis in fact. Isn’t that how disinformation works?

Then, of course, the other “true believers,” who in olden times would have been blathering about faeries, nymphs, spirits and demons (and the astonishing variety thereof), have started shilling their crap and conspiracy theories about aliens… all of which plays into the hands of the dirty tricks brigade, if indeed they are behind this.

Damn it, I’m running out of tinfoil!

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