Facebooking Woman Takes A Long Walk Off A Short Pier

from the status-update:-wet dept

The stories of people paying such rapt attention to their phones or GPS have somehow tapered off lately. There was a rash of them a while back, what with people falling into manholes or ending up on the wrong side of a continent, but we’ve been suspiciously without such an occurrence for some time. Did the general population somehow uniformly raise their IQ points a few notches? Did tech companies build in some kind of idiot-proof safeguard? Did one of our esteemed pharmaceutical companies develop a stupid vaccination?

Well, if any of that has indeed happened, it must not have hit Australia, where one woman decided to see if she could play out a 1950’s insult in today’s time by taking a long walk off a short pier. The culprit in this mishap is her smart phone and that damned Facebook app.

Senior Constable Dean Kelly of the water police said officers found her floating metres from the pier.

“She was still out in the water laying on her back in a floating position because she told us later that she couldn’t swim,” the Australian Broadcasting Corporation quoted him as saying. “She still had her mobile phone in her hand and initially she apologised… she said ‘I was checking my Facebook page on the phone and I’ve fallen in’.”

See, that cute picture of her niece’s friend’s dog eating a lovely veal shank she’d cooked that night was too important to peer away from, resulting in one too many steps on a pier and a whole lot of wet. Now, I’m no expert, but it would seem to me that if I couldn’t swim, the place where I’d be most interested in paying attention to my surroundings would be on an ocean pier. Also, if this is how this non-swimming woman behaved in this setting, what level of oblivious does she reach when she’s going about her normal day.

Still, if you were worried about that phone of hers, fear not.

Victoria police, meanwhile, said in a statement that there was no need for a lost property report because the woman “kept hold of her mobile phone throughout the entire ordeal”.

That’s the kind of dedication that is sorely lacking in the world today. Especially amongst those that should probably be exempted from the gene pool.

Filed Under: ,
Companies: facebook

Rate this comment as insightful
Rate this comment as funny
You have rated this comment as insightful
You have rated this comment as funny
Flag this comment as abusive/trolling/spam
You have flagged this comment
The first word has already been claimed
The last word has already been claimed
Insightful Lightbulb icon Funny Laughing icon Abusive/trolling/spam Flag icon Insightful badge Lightbulb icon Funny badge Laughing icon Comments icon

Comments on “Facebooking Woman Takes A Long Walk Off A Short Pier”

Subscribe: RSS Leave a comment
Rikuo (profile) says:

Re: Re:

Except in this case, the woman deserves it. She pays so much attention to Facebook, that she loses all awareness to the world around her. It reminds me of another story a couple years back of a woman who worked in a shopping mall, who was walking in that mall paying so much attention to her phone that she ended up walking into a fountain in the middle of the floor…then proceeded to sue the mall because of her own stupidity.
Here it is

Ninja (profile) says:

Dang, we almost had a Darwin Award here! Natural selection didn’t act fast enough. Now imagine if the phone was waterproof? I’d guess the headline would be “Woman found thousands of kilometers from home country after being distracted by waterproof phone” and the woman saying “Once my battery died I noticed I was drifting in the middle of the ocean, it was so scary!”.

Human stupidity knows no frontiers!

John Fenderson (profile) says:

Re: Re: Re:

You’ve neglected to define “weak” and “strong”, so it’s hard to comment on most of what you said. However this part: “There is no such thing as natural selection anymore” is 100% untrue regardless.

Natural selection is working just as much now as ever. It selects for those traits that are best adapted to the environment in which the species is operating. Things like medical care, etc., do not stop natural selection, they merely change the environment and so change the traits being selected.

Natural selection defines “weak” as “poorly adapted to the environment” and “strong” as “well adapted to the environment.” In the right setting, a pasty, physically underdeveloped, asthmatic nerd can be the strongest.

Jeffrey Nonken (profile) says:

The Register’s coverage added that there may have been sharks in the water.

But I have to add that there was one difference between this and most of the other “distracted by tech” stories I’ve read. In this case, at least the woman just came right out and admitted she screwed up. She didn’t blame the tech, or her unfamiliarity with the area, or the sun in her eyes, or the government for putting an ocean right where people are going to stumble over it by accident. How often do you see people doing that these days?

She also didn’t panic when she fell in, but did the best thing she could, lie still and wait for rescue. Training or natural aplomb? I’m somewhat impressed either way.

Sure, laugh at her mistake. But give her credit, she handled it well and owned up. If she hadn’t, you’d have made fun of her attempts to shift the blame. Since she did, credit where credit is due, please.

El Reg
http://m.theregister.co.uk/2013/12/19/omfg_i_like_fell_into_shark_infested_waters_while_looking_at_facebook/ in case I screwed that up, no preview feature in Techdirt Mobile.

Add Your Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Have a Techdirt Account? Sign in now. Want one? Register here

Comment Options:

Make this the or (get credits or sign in to see balance) what's this?

What's this?

Techdirt community members with Techdirt Credits can spotlight a comment as either the "First Word" or "Last Word" on a particular comment thread. Credits can be purchased at the Techdirt Insider Shop »

Follow Techdirt

Techdirt Daily Newsletter

Techdirt Deals
Techdirt Insider Discord
The latest chatter on the Techdirt Insider Discord channel...