Using Your Computer Too Much Makes You Have An Affair

from the oh,-the-horror!--the-horror! dept

Brad Brunfelt writes “Apparently either using your computer too much or having multiple email accounts makes you have an affair. The Christian Science Monitor accepts the statement: “One of the first signs of cyber-affairs, Daniels notes, is a spouse who spends excessive time on the computer. Using multiple e-mail addresses could also serve as a warning of cyber-flirting.” Sounds like a lot of us have some explaining to do to our spouses, because we all know that they suspect us anyway. And we all know that there are no other good reasons to use multiple email addresses or be online at night. It MUST be an affair.”

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Comments on “Using Your Computer Too Much Makes You Have An Affair”

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blairkincaide says:

Re: The accessible affair...

I think the article is pointing out how accessible an affair is, even a purely emotional one, with the current state of technology and communication. It would be difficult to argue anything contrary. While multiple email addresses may grant several alter-ego options (as do IM names, mmorpg characters, etc.), it obviously does not mean everyone who has one is engaged in something illicit. But the availability of anonymous communication as well as the perception of privacy makes online affairs a much easier option to one that is physical.
What I can’t tell is if the original post was commenting on the article itself or that it originated from the Christian Science Monitor. Anyone who follows journalism recognizes that the Monitor has always been one of the best newspapers around, probably because it does not face corporate or political pressures that exist in other papers.
It would be sad, and misinformed, if the intent was to discredit the reporting in this paper simply because of the word “Christian”.
[disclaimer: religiously unaffiliated]

Brad Brunfelt says:

Re: Re: Teh original article

I was hardly commenting on the CSM. It is an excellent resource, and I told them so in my letter to them. It simply needed to be said about the article.

The word “Christian” in their name has nothing to do with it. Though, being a theologian, I often do take Christian literalists/fundamentalists to task for psuedo science and overly broad assertions about human nature (ie all people are sinful by nature)

This however has nothing to do with the monitor, which keeps its integrity intact quite well thanks to a variety of reasons, including feedback to articles which do not meet the high standards that they ususally adhere to.


blairkincaide says:

Re: Re: Re: Teh original article

I think RJ and I basically approach this from a similar position. Technology is used to make things easier. Even the dirty things. Mike originally posted the quote: “One of the first signs of cyber-affairs, Daniels notes, is a spouse who spends excessive time on the computer. Using multiple e-mail addresses could also serve as a warning of cyber-flirting.” I think we can all agree that it’s fairly silly to try and note “excessive time on the computer” as being the first sign of a cyber affair. It’s such a sweeping generality that fails to recognize the other elements that contribute to an affair of any kind. And many of us who use the computer excessively all the time, but are decent people with values and conscience. But you have to note who is making the statement: Diane Daniels. And who is Diane Daniels? A “former technology expert” who used google to find some posts. Not a psychologist. Not a marriage councelor. Not even an investigator. Just someone who used a search engine to find some naughty conversations some slimeball was making behind his wife’s back. As to multiple email addresses, sure they could be used for filtering messages from corespondents you don’t want visible. Multiple email addresses can be used for lots of things: to remain anonymous on the surface, or to filter spam, or whatever.

The topic is interesting, sort of. But in this case, the depth and reporting is lacking, as Brad notes.

ben dover says:


I had six email addresses. My wife had one. I spent four or five hours a day on the internet chatting and posting. She spent an hour or two a week online. She had the affair while I was busy in cyberspace. The internet is a tool like any other and people are going to do what people are going to do. The CSM could just as easily make a case that a spouse who drives more than the other is more likely to be having an affair and find enough circumstantial data to support the conclusion.

RJD says:

No Subject Given

There are a number of reasons, good, bad, and imagined for having multiple e-mail accounts. I usually associate them with someone who’s a rookie on the net or badly organized and feel they need multiple addresses as a way of differentiating their mail.

There’s nothing inherently evil or bad about the internet or the people who use it. Those who are ‘having emotional affairs’ or other such activity are simply making use of technology rather than pursuing more traditional routes (thinking friendly lunches or a drink after work where you both poor your hearts out about how bad your life is at home, etc).

As with all things, the internet simply a better/quicker facilitator of activities you’ve normally performed or would perform.

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