Dark Helmet's Favorite Posts Of The Week, Jerks....

from the dark-helmet-approved dept

So, apparently someone else was supposed to do the favorites this week, but failed to show up. I can only assume they were afraid of the trolls, which is understandable. In any case, I'll keep this brief, for fear of upsetting Out Of The Blue and sending him/her/it into some kind of schizoid frenzy in which he kills a bunch of people at the local McDonald's because they forgot the second pickle on his Big Mac....

1. Clearly the best written, most interesting story of the week was the tale of a dumbass porn company suing a mobile phone manufacturer. I mean, honestly, the writing? Top notch. I read the prose, the puns, the jokes, it was like a mix of Shakespeare, John Wayne, and whoever hosted The Bozo Show. Pure beauty. Let's recommend whoever wrote this for an Oscar, shall we?

2. Look, all jokes aside, Techdirt managed to shed its opinion site mantra for a quick moment and break what I think is ultimately going to be a really big story. The United States Government, so long the pride of the world, has disgraced itself in the name of profit. Look, the political climate is very much charged these days, whether you're a progressive liberal, a conservative republican, or even one of those weirdos cheering for Ron Paul. We all seem to find ourselves on some kind of a political line, where gangs have grown to make us feel some sense of loyalty for reasons I don't think any of us can articulate. That said, political religion aside, I would hope against hope, pray against all prayer, plead with all the makers of every possible religion, that we would remit our pride in our country when the ruling leadership begins to usher in a time in which entire online outlets are shut down without legal cause. It is funny that we laugh at the ineptitude of our leaders, yet we do not shake at the crimes they occasionally -- or not so occasionally -- commit. Does that make us criminals? I don't know. But read this story with true trepidation. Understand that there is much more at stake than just that in the details here. Read with fear and anger, and educate those around you that this is what is to come should we not act.

3. There are times when I think that we are in for a true fight, we folks on this side of the IP law debate. Then the other side pulls out a gun, aims it carefully at their own feet, and pulls the trigger gleefully, as though they were doing their side any good. Such was the MPAA this past week, essentially comparing their efforts with SOPA to the grand Chinese tradition of attempted and ineffectual thought control. Nothing says, "make me a campaign talking point" like comparing your goals to Chinese censorship.

Okay, there's a ton of stories that get published every week on Techdirt, some of which I write, most of which I don't. We're coming up on the holiday season here, and I don't know how much of a platform I'll have here at the end of the year, so let me take a moment to thank everyone here in the spirit of the holidays. Honestly, it means a great deal to me to have Mike want me to write pieces of a great blog like Techdirt now and again. But, though I respect the hell out of Mike, the reason I love writing and commenting here is all of you. I've been spouting my crap around here for going on three years now. Those folks that have been here since then, or longer, God bless you for helping make Techdirt something special. Mike's a smart guy, but I bet he'd concede that this site is made so much better by all of you, so please accept my sincerest thanks for making Techdirt a place I can call home online, as dumb as that sounds, and for helping this to be a platform to share news, information, and help those that wish to embrace the future, not cower in fear of it. Happy holidays people!


Reader Comments (rss)

(Flattened / Threaded)

  1.  
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    Nigel Lew (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 12:45pm

    Nicely done!
    And thanks for lending a hand on my little "occupy the creative america facebook page" I just realized you are one of the few that speaks up with some facts. I can't seem to get any out of the industry folks.



    Nigel

     

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    darryl, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 12:54pm

    The Mantra !!!!

    Techdirt managed to shed its opinion site mantra

    Yes, mantra's are big here on TD, beats facts..

    In any case, I'll keep this brief, for fear of upsetting Out Of The Blue and sending him/her/it into some kind of schizoid frenzy

    An ad hominem (Latin for "to the man" or "to the person"), short for argumentum ad hominem, is an attempt to negate the truth of a claim by pointing out a negative characteristic or belief of the person supporting it.

    political religion aside Religion !!!!!! ????


    There are times when I think that we are in for a true fight

    And what have you done up to now ? (and for the past 3 years) ??? whack a mole ?

    I've been spouting my crap around here for going on three years now.

    Don't worry WE KNOW... and you admit that you are "in for a fight" !! at least you are willing to admit you spout crap, and that is how you show your 'respect' for Masnick.

    Those folks that have been here since then, or longer, God bless you for helping make Techdirt something special.

    Yet Masnick still cannot work out how to design an efficient web page !!! It still looks like something a 7 year old would do....

    as dumb as that sounds
    dont worry we've forgiven you for sounding dumb long ago..

    and help those that wish to embrace the future, not cower in fear of it.

    Embrace the future by stealing the past !!, not cower in fear, all that ever happens on this site is the proporgation of fear. and alot of cowering..

    Yes, it's coming up to the end of the year, would be a good time to detail what TD has achieved over the past year or even the past several years.

    If you do something for years and years and years, and it does not work, why keep doing it?

    Is it for the money ?

    You would think that after 3 years you guys would work out what a troll is, it is NOT someone who you disagree with, as it appears to be on this site.

    If you disagree with Masnick, his guard dogs will call you a troll.. and at the same time fail to address the issue of the article..

    Usually because they are not capable of formulating a viable fact to refute the claim.. when all else fails, throw reason out the window and call them a troll..

    And use your little soap box to play a nasty, purile little shit throwing against another commenter of the site.

    What a scumbag...

    You are given a chance to comment, and you use it to play a dirty, nasty little stab at another person who just happens to have a different opinion to your "mantra"...

    Look, the political climate is very much charged these days,

    Yea,, how ???

     

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    xenomancer (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 12:56pm

    I'll keep this brief, for fear of upsetting [...]
    And this is how the terrorists win.

    X-D

     

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    Marcus Carab (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 12:59pm

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Merry Christmas to you too, Darryl!

     

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    Nigel Lew (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 1:02pm

    @darryl

    /Insert sound of crickets chirping here./ You're entire word salad of a diatribe is a non sequitur.

    That is all.

    Nigel

     

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    gigglehurtz (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 1:20pm

    Happy holidays?

    Happy holidays people!

    You realize, of course, dis means war!

    Not from me. I'm all for giving this time of year back to the pagans.

    BUT WAR!!1!

    (and happy holidays to you, too)

     

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    xenomancer (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 1:26pm

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Darryl!!! So good to see you're back. I had a couple comments on what you've added to this wonderful discussion:
    Yes, mantra's are big here on TD, beats facts..
    You should know. Please leave the poor facts alone or I'll have to call the ASPCA on you.
    An ad hominem (Latin for "to the man" or "to the person"), short for argumentum ad hominem, is an attempt to negate the truth of a claim by pointing out a negative characteristic or belief of the person supporting it.
    I'm glad you finally got a dictionary, please look up "shill" and "troll." Can you cite three differences in their character and behavior?
    Don't worry WE KNOW... and you admit that you are "in for a fight" !! at least you are willing to admit you spout crap, and that is how you show your 'respect' for Masnick.
    Your elation is a bit premature. When will you admit you take yourself just a little too seriously like the rest of us?
    Yet Masnick still cannot work out how to design an efficient web page !!! It still looks like something a 7 year old would do....
    Well, since nowadays a 7 year old could program circles around you, I think your statement is just a touch oxymoronic.
    dont worry we've forgiven you for sounding dumb long ago..
    This is no place to practice silly walks on your keyboard. I came here for an argument!!!
    Embrace the future by stealing the past !!, not cower in fear, all that ever happens on this site is the proporgation of fear. and alot of cowering..
    The historic larsony you refer to is nothing more than the pure ideology of innovation. If we hadn't pilfered the work of Voltaire, for instance, we would not have reached the modern electrified world we have to bitch about today... STOP CAUSING THE DOWNFALL OF SOCIETY. Thanks.
    If you do something for years and years and years, and it does not work, why keep doing it?
    You presume that nothing happens here in the doldrums of Techdirt. Maybe if you read AND comprehended something besides your own comments, you might see that there is often a decent discussion in your absence.
    You would think that after 3 years you guys would work out what a troll is, it is NOT someone who you disagree with, as it appears to be on this site.
    Maybe you should open your eyes to the many times where different opinions, many of them polar opposites, are actually discussed here.
    If you disagree with Masnick, his guard dogs will call you a troll.. and at the same time fail to address the issue of the article..
    Like you often do when it comes to addressing facts. For shame, pot, the kettle has feelings too.
    Usually because they are not capable of formulating a viable fact to refute the claim.. when all else fails, throw reason out the window and call them a troll..
    You seem to misstranslate your pejoratives when pointing the troll cannon at others. Maybe you just need to toughen yourself up over at 4chan for a couple months.
    And use your little soap box to play a nasty, purile little shit throwing against another commenter of the site.

    What a scumbag...

    You are given a chance to comment, and you use it to play a dirty, nasty little stab at another person who just happens to have a different opinion to your "mantra"...
    You seem a little bitter. Perhaps you should stop sucking that lemon, or at least eat some magic fruit beforehand.
    Look, the political climate is very much charged these days,

    Yea,, how ???
    By shoving multimeter probes up politicians' asses, of course. To paraphrase Heisenberg, you can't measure a system without disturbing it.

    As you should no doubt be capable of discerning, I wrote the majority of the above comments in mild jest with a ring of truth. I left enough material for a hungry troll to sink its teeth into, but I challenge you not to stoop so low... unless its funny.

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 1:40pm

    Darryl = OOTB

     

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    Jay (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 1:47pm

    Re:

    No, ootb is his own special of ranting goodness... You can't confuse them.

     

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    Nigel Lew (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 1:58pm

    "No, ootb is his own special of ranting goodness... You can't confuse them."

    Indeed, I think this thread is destined for greatness lol..

    N.

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 3:19pm

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    You cannot have an ad hominem argument when you are not even engaged in an argument. Try again next time, Darryl. Preferably after learning how to communicate with humans.

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 3:27pm

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    uh oh Darrylrrhea! somebody get the pepto!

     

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    Dark Helmet (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 3:32pm

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Love you too, sweetheart....

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 5:02pm

    Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    It truly must suck when Darryl hands you your ass.

     

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    Marcus Carab (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 5:10pm

    Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    It truly must suck to be on Darryl's side.

     

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    Jeffrey Nonken (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 5:16pm

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    "An ad hominem (Latin for "to the man" or "to the person"), short for argumentum ad hominem, is an attempt to negate the truth of a claim by pointing out a negative characteristic or belief of the person supporting it."

    Ad hominem is when you use a personal attack to try to counter an argument. But there's no discussion happening here.

    This is merely name-calling. There's a difference.

     

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    Atkray (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 5:20pm

    Re:

    darryl!= out_of_the_blue

    While both have their own charming personality quirks, darryl just rants whereas ootb will on occasion have a coherent post.

    darryl may be bob on medication.

     

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    LyleD, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 5:26pm

    Nice weekly DH.. Gotta say the comments are looking good so far..

    Pass the popcorn...

     

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    A Guy (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 5:31pm

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    "Techdirt managed to shed its opinion site mantra

    Yes, mantra's are big here on TD, beats facts.."


    Make a logical argument and someone will respond with a logical response. Spout nonsense and troll and someone will respond with a canned mantra to troll you back.

    "political religion aside...
    Religion !!!!!! ???? "


    Religion is that which you cannot compromise over. I think it very aptly describes politics in America today.

    "...and that is how you show your 'respect' for Masnick...

    ...Yet Masnick still cannot work out how to design an efficient web page !!! It still looks like something a 7 year old would do....

    ...for sounding dumb long ago..

    ...What a scumbag"


    Didn't you say something about ad hominem earlier in your post?

    This blatant hypocrisy is why you are not taken seriously and labeled a troll.

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 5:37pm

    Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Beats being up Mike's ass. How is the view from in there, anyway?

     

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    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:02pm

    Some things never change...they're always there...like that grapej juice stain on the new white rig... like darryl

    Hi ya Darryl! How's it going kiddo? Glad to see you're still around and that your command of the English language is a poor as it ever was though your usage has, marginally, improved.

    Nice to see your definition of ad hominim. I never would have known, otherwise. Even if I can't spell it. Pardon my poor Latin. But until OOTB started to use it as an all purpose defence/insult I didn't need to. So I don't really care. Blue's fits here do read as more schizoid and anything else so I'll just leave it at that while you wander off and have one of your own. Seriously, I don't mind. After all I do volunteer work at the regional detox so nothing you do could bother me or be unexpected. Just go for it and them we'll find someone to tuck you in.

    Yeah, political religion. Politics become that way when, like modern logical/scientific atheism they adopt an orthodoxy, pledge allegiance and worship to a single figure, declare all those who don't agree with the current orthodoxy to be heretics or worse. Adopt a Satan figure or belief, for example socialism for Republicans most of whom haven't the faintest idea what it is or that it's not the form of communism adopted by Lenin, Stalin, Mao and company.
    The Democrats are no better. By the way, Ronald Regan would be horrified at what is being done in his name if interviews with the man and his speeches are anything to go by.

    Dunno about you but we've been fighting the "good" fight while you've been off whacking moles. How'd that go? Do they taste good?

    In terms of the basics of web site design this one is very well designed for a site based on WordPress. If you want to see a bad one look up Creative America (aka "the enemy") dropping so much flash on their home page that it almost overwhelms a browser and then sits there and does nothing. No bouncing boobies that I could find. Not yet, but this is a Hollywood site there will be some shortly, don't fret. Meanwhile they're taking tips of the design and structure of web sites from Big Porn. So the bouncing boobies gotta come, right?

    Back to the design. It does what it's supposed to, nothing more, nothing less and that's what good web site design is all about. Not how many gizmos you can slap onto it and how many 3000bpi photos you slap on it.

    Yes, we've forgiven DH for his occasional forays into the literary interstellar regions of taste but I see you aren't interested in doing penance for that as much much worse.

    More to the point the biggest thief of the past is Disney surrounding folk and fairy tales with walls of gleefully over enforced copyright claims. Nothing at all creative there but I know you just love it. Oh yeah, and sanitizing them to the point where the lessons they were supposed to teach are lost just so Disney can find a place for Tinkerbell (tm) to soar off when the happy ending comes. They were better off in the public domain.

    I'll also suggest to you that the only one dealing in fear and cowering today is YOU. Nothing new there which is why I'm so pleased you've returned. Makes it all feel like old home week somehow. Comfy and warm, in it's own special way.

    And what's wrong with 7 year olds that you have to drag them into this? I'm reasonably certain that I can find a 7 year old that can whip up a usable, efficient, well laid out web site in no time at all. Actually I know I can. She's doing it right now for her elementary school.

    As for DH's crap, it's well written, well reasoned crap. Kinda special really. And it's compostable after use so it can be used for fertilizer while your post would poison ground water so we can't use it for that.

    Actually this site has accomplished a fair bit after piercing through the white noise raised around a number of issues. And like most people who don't like the place you seem to confuse usefulness, progress and creation with money. The former and latter are not mutually exclusive. Never have been never will be and if THAT message gets through to one more person I have to say the site is a success.

    Ohhhhhh, and we are intimately familiar with the species known as internetus trolline. They are most comfortable under bridges in the darkest spots possible popping up now and then to threaten people by promising to make a meal of them or take their wonderful selves off to another web site to try it there. They don't accomplish much of either, though like Vampires they avoid direct sunlight and dislike warmth.

    Simply not agreeing with the devil Masnick is not enough to be accused of being a troll. First one has to display the other behavioural patterns such as popping up when least welcome and least wanted or invited such as you have here.

    Nor do they attack any issue that can be refuted with, too often, there are already mountains of but that they won't look at. Not anyone's fault here. Though they will whinge on about some imaginary $100 million movie or something similar from time to time frequently making no sense other than displaying a clinical allergy to actually working or simply accepting that no unknown ever has or ever will get anyone to invest that kind of coin in them. Just an example, really.

    All that keeps Blue, for example, from being classed a troll is the startling reality that he actually addresses issues thoughtfully, intelligently and is prepared to discuss them in a most untrollish way until his next bout occurs. When that happens, agree or not with Mike, he's a pleasure to have around.

    The same dynamic is at work with Average Joe. Disargeeing, after all, is one of the best ways humans find to learn. It's absent in internetus trolline who would rather threaten, rant and rave then not listen all the while complaining that no one listens to them. Could it be because we've heard it all before, refuted it so often that we do it in our sleep now and we'd rather be left alone?

    "And use your little soap box to play a nasty, purile little shit throwing against another commenter of the site." I think I know what you mean there but the sentence still doesn't make sense so you've just earned yourself a FAIL for grammar and will have to stay after class.

    Well, actually, we'd prefer if you returned to your hidey hole underneath the bridge if it comes to that. I understand it's winter down there and a touch cold but trolls have lots of hair and fur and are quite capable of keeping warm in arctic cold and it's not THAT cold down there.

    Thing is, Darryl, that you ARE a troll, as you've just proven. Again. You must be as you display the behaviours and attitude of the species. Don't be too upset, you've found your self a home. It's actually quite nice under our bridge and you're welcome to stay there for as long as you wish.

    And that's why I'm so pleased to see you've returned. Not only does it confirm my long held opinion that, in all reality, the more things change the more they stay the same and that, at this dark, cold time of year is nice to have confirmed.

    Should you want to eat me or call me nasty names do so by all means. First, though, you have to eat a whole haggis while listening to someone play the highland bagpipes poorly and retaining whatever passes for sanity in you.

    Then you really must learn the basics of a civilized conversation. Until you do you won't be able to have one.

    Finally, as you act like a troll, speak like troll, make as little sense as a troll and spout tantrums like a troll you are, ergo, a troll. Really simple, isn't it.

    As I said, be pleased that you've actually found out what you really are and revel in it. We are here to help, above all.

    Nitey nite.

     

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    charliebrown (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:02pm

    Question:

    Tomorrow I need to have an operation on my eye, involving lasers. I will probably need to wear an eye patch for a few days. I am a regular TechDirt reader and I think Mike is great. Will all this, especially the eye patch, make me a pirate?

     

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    That Anonymous Coward (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:07pm

    Re: Question:

    Puffy Shirt and Parrot are required.

     

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    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:12pm

    Re: Question:

    Indeed it will. We'll welcome you back, teach you the secret handshake of all piratedom, award you with your own personal cutlass and a small supply of rum. The rest you'll have to download from that passle of sites so thoughtfully provided by the RIAA and MPAA. Wasn't that nice of them?

    If you really are having laser surgery good luck. If not, I do like questions I get to riff on from time to time.

     

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  25.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:18pm

    It looks like Fat Bastard used 3 second verbal sound bites, not performances, for that megaupload video. Not only did UMG have the right to pull it, but I think they just received some free ammunition.

     

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    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:32pm

    Thanks for picking this up DH

    I didn't get Mikes instructions until it was too late as spamassasin insisted he was a spammer, didn't follow the filtering rules it was told to and generally acted like a jerk. So I thought there has been a change of plan. I was looking forward to it, too.

    Had I known our favourite troll Darryl would pop up I'd have done the Dr Who thing, gone back in time, grabbed the alleged spam done my story and to hell with any temporal paradox that may have occurred. Though stories by us both would probably have overloaded Darryl's brain circuits and caused him some harm or forced him onto next year's edition of Canada's Worst Driver. He'd fit in nicely there with the worst of the worst.

    Great job, by the way, and Darryl's appearance just topped off my weekend Thanks!

    (Did you take his ice cream cone from him or laugh at him when a seagull pooped on it? Really, you must have done something! :))

     

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    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:37pm

    Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Actually it's Darryl's hand squeezing your ass in the darkest part of the bar. But don't worry. He doesn't mean anything and even if he does he's incapable of doing anything.

    Have fun.

     

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  28.  
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    Capitalist Lion Tamer (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 6:40pm

    Re:

    ... but not SOPA or Protect IP.

     

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  29.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 7:59pm

    Re:

    @darryl

    /Insert sound of crickets chirping here./ You're entire word salad of a diatribe is a non sequitur.

    That is all.

    Nigel


    Sosayeth the salad tosser.

     

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  30.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 8:11pm

    Re:

    Brains have left the building!

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 8:23pm

    Re: Question:

    Download a pirate song and you will be purfect!

    Camouflage cat

    ps: Don't forget the catnip.

     

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  32.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 8:26pm

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    C'mon lets have some fun, how about playing horse I be the front and you be yourself!

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 8:36pm

    Copyright = coprolite

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 8:43pm

    Re: Re:

    When did you get out of prison man?

    tossed salad man

     

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    Anonymous Coward, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 8:47pm

    Re: Re:

    No soup or protein IV for me please just the popcorn.

     

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    Marcus Carab (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 9:29pm

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    It truly must suck when Darryl hands you your ass ... Beats being up Mike's ass.

    You really have a bit of an ass thing, huh?

     

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    Nigel Lew (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 9:35pm

    "Sosayeth the salad tosser."

    Really dude? is that all you got?

    when your balls actually drop you can talk with adults.

    nigel

     

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    Edward Teach, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 10:03pm

    Re:

    Lad, only a dinosaur would utter such drivel as thou doest. Arr, mate.

     

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    identicon
    Mr Big Content, Dec 10th, 2011 @ 10:03pm

    Re: It truly must suck when Darryl hands you your ass.

    Unfortunately, it takes a special, even unique, level of discernment to appreciate that point, which is all too lacking among the Techdirt readership.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  40.  
    icon
    xenomancer (profile), Dec 10th, 2011 @ 10:20pm

    Re: Re:

    I don't think a misplaced cardboard box counts as a building. Besides, that lot's been vacant for years.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  41.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 12:23am

    Re: Re:

    ootb generally has a pattern of refreshing a lot to see if any new posts have been made before proceeding to trash everything about the article and the writer (without having actually read the former).

    darryl's posting occurrences are erratic and he makes up for it by a lot of length and a perpetual lack of quality.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  42.  
    icon
    timlash (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 1:00am

    Clowns

    FYI - Bozo the Clown hosted the Bozo show. Glad I could help.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  43.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 1:33am

    Re: Re: darryl!= out_of_the_blue

    i was going to say this too - when nt talking about IP OOTB seems to have his heart in the right place (sometimes with a hint of hillbilly?)

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  44.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 1:42am

    Re: Re:

    Thou should not Brabble or your thoughts may come to be Jargogle but that may not trouble someone hoddypeak like thyself.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  45.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 1:58am

    Re: Re:

    Fine tushery.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  46.  
    icon
    Capitalist Lion Tamer (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 2:19am

    Splendid work, DH

    Very nicely done wrapup, DH, especially for one cranked out at the last minute. Direct, punchy and self-congratulatory, just like a Krugman op-ed.

    I also enjoyed your holiday shout-out to the TD community. As a late-arriving member of the TDC, I also feel privileged to be given the horn now and then (which I then proceed to fill with adjectives and hyperbole), but the ultimate privilege is being part of something bigger than myself.

    Despite the fact that there's already a Tim tossing out occasional bits of porn-related news, the community here has made me feel welcome (or at least, not completely rejected) and has several times taken to the comment threads to defend my words against waves of argumentative detractors.

    True, the addition of another "Tim" has sometimes proved confusing (or redundant), but the commenters have taken care to differentiate by referring to me as "the other Tim," "the Tim without the penis jokes," "the less funny Tim," and occasionally, "Mike."

    Certain interlopers have also elbowed their way into the threads to point out that I should keep my day job and get back to work so that my wife doesn't have to. To them I say, "My wife knew what she was getting into. She married me when I was still an underemployed DJ." If she had any concern about my ability to earn a decent income with my "talent," she had plenty of time to opt out during the reading of the vows. You know, "in richness or in POORNESS, in sickness and in milking an undefinable knee injury, for better business models or for worse..."

    In all honesty though, writing for Techdirt has been an amazing experience. I've gotten to know some really great people and have been endlessly entertained and informed by the stellar comments contributed by Techdirt readers. No matter how badly a piece gets trolled, there's always someone willing to smack down the jackasses. This is greatly appreciated as I'm often unavailable to do it myself. (Yes, constant detractors: I actually still have a day job. Two of them. My wife gets a day of from 'supporting a writer' now and then.)

    And yes, I do believe someone should give DH an Oscar. (Maybe he could have Marisa Tomei's.) And present it to him during the Pulitzers.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  47.  
    icon
    The eejit (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 2:53am

    Re: Re:

    I toss salads for a living. You're a fuckwit.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  48.  
    icon
    The eejit (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 2:53am

    Re: Re:

    Can I not pass the SOse?

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  49.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:05am

    Re: Re: Question:

    Yep, I am. I'm kind of nervous but hopefully it'll pass.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  50.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:05am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Nope, sorry.... just describing your position with vivid terms. If you object to the terms, perhaps you would prefer "toady" or "yes man".

    Heck, talentless schmuck still applies too, I have heard.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  51.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:06am

    Re: Re: Re: Question:

    oops, I forgot to sign in.... Oh well, I'll be an AC today!

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  52.  
    icon
    techflaws.org (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:11am

    Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    How would you know?. Darryl never ever managed to do so which is understandable since he can't even tell his head from his ass.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  53.  
    icon
    techflaws.org (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:12am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Yawn. Boring troll stays boring.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  54.  
    icon
    techflaws.org (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:14am

    Re: Re:

    Being no native speaker I never really got that figure of speech. Why salad?

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  55.  
    icon
    techflaws.org (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:14am

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    TL;dr.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  56.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:25am

    Re: Re:

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  57.  
    icon
    Cixelsid (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:30am

    Re: Re:

    I've said it before and I'll say it again, Darryl types like he's drunk. His arguments make as much sense and you can't reason with him. I think he's secretly upset that DH mentioned OOTB in his post and forgot all about him. He's been ousted as resident retard so he broke open the liquor cabinet and now he's furiously typing out his frustrations.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  58.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:40am

    Re: Re: Re:

    http://www.wordorigins.org/

    Apparently it came into usage after an HBO documentary about prison life.

    http://msgboard.snopes.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=93;t=000752;p=0

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  59.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:53am

    Re: Re: Re:

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  60.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 3:57am

    Re: Re:

    No soup or protein IV for me please.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  61.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 4:21am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Do you have any reasons to be curious about rectal exams, enemas, colonoscopies or fecal transplants?

    If you need help, people would help you, just ask.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  62.  
    identicon
    Loki, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 5:37am

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    If you do something for years and years and years, and it does not work, why keep doing it?

    Funny, that pretty much sums up the question most of us have been asking the entertainment industry for the past ten years.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  63.  
    identicon
    Rich, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 5:52am

    Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Yes, Helment writes a cogent synopsis, while Da-Da-Da-Darryl goes off on a rambling diatribe. They must have a different meaning for "ass-handing" where you're from.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  64.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 5:53am

    Re: Re:

    So you're also saying it's obvious that the artists were misled?

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  65.  
    icon
    The Devil's Coachman (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 6:24am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Ask your momma.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  66.  
    icon
    Gwiz (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 6:27am

    Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  67.  
    icon
    The Devil's Coachman (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 6:30am

    Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Hi Darryl. You so remind me of the three Darryls on the old Bob Newhart show. In the interest of the furtherance of the concept of a valid and appropriate ad hominum approach, I would like to beg you to try, just for once, not being such a twat! I know you cannot, but just for shit's sake, give it at least one try. There. Are you happy now? I know your being an intractable verbal diarrhea case must be very taxing on you, so perhaps you don't have the strength to do it.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  68.  
    icon
    The Devil's Coachman (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 6:31am

    Re: Re: Question:

    Don't forget the hook!

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  69.  
    identicon
    Jeremy7600, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 7:05am

    Re:

    They have the right to pull it? On what grounds? If they aren't performances, but sound bites, what rights do they even have in the first place? Sounds like prior restraint since they were just "sound bites" according to you and not some performance.

    Are they suppressing speech? or something they own the copyrights to? How can they own copyright on opinion, or a work they didn't author?

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  70.  
    identicon
    mike Rice, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 7:35am

    How The Cell Phone Industry Epitomizes Govt's Capitulation to Special Interests

    I spent the weekend trying to create a computer phone using an OBI110 I just bought, to create a free digital phone by harnessing it to Google Voice's Google Chat. I've had Google Voice since July, 2009. In January, 2010 I bought a Verizon Straight talk phone. I added it to the string of phones I own that Google Voice will ring me from through a phone number that GV allowed me to partially choose for myself. There was a hitch. Verizon removed the ability of the phone keypad to create tones once the phone is answered. I got around this at the time by generating the tones from another cellphone into the Straight Talk's speaker phone, thus authorizing the phone. I deleted the phone for some reason in 2010, then re-authorized it using the same method. I realized late Saturday that I shouldn't have and needn't have de-authorized the straight talk to light up the OBI110 Friday. I could have left the Straight Talk in the lineup and still gotten the OBI110 working. But by the time I found this out, it was too late. Verizon had figured out how I got around them. They had secured the database of every phone number that runs on Verizon, talked Google into cooperating by parsing that database for phones Verizon wanted to exclude, then 'not recognizing' tones from the low rent neighborhood of pre-paid cell phones- including Alltel, that Verizon swallowed up two years ago- when it discovered cheap rates and more features on pre-paid phones were starting to undermine the rising tide of revenue from the company's increasingly, App-happy smartphones.

    Verizon had stopped me for one reason: The company is denying me this perk because I don't pay as much as they want me to for the phone ($98), and I don't pay enough monthly ($30, 1,000 minutes,1,000 texts, 30 megs internet) either.

    This goes to the heart of what is wrong with regulation in the US and what is wrong with America in general: The Special Interests have simply purchased from politicians what the progressive movement of the early 20th century had paid dearly for, on behalf of its citizens.

    Instead of a regulator telling Verizon what to do in this instance, Verizon gets to regulate itself. Allowing my phone to ring in a Google Voice string, is not something that threatens Verizon technically. Verizon wants me to pay more for a smarter phone to get this perk.

    I used to own a cable system and am thoroughly grounded in the theory of US regulation, and how rates are determined. The minute I heard about cell phones and how they are regulated (really, not at all), I was appalled that US regulators had created a double standard: one for the regulated, and one for the unregulated. Clearly there was money behind the unregulated new cell phone medium.

    I will drop my Straight Talk phone now. I will find another cell phone that is just as cheap and rings in a google voice string. I will probably start a facebook page devoted to the single issue of the rights of Straight Talk and Alltel phone owners, and write the correct committees of Congress, and the toothless regulators too. The US will never really recover unless the political equity of the un-powerful, the 99%, the Poor, the disenfranchised, is restored.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  71.  
    icon
    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 8:10am

    Re: Re: Re:

    precisely

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  72.  
    identicon
    Loki, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 8:15am

    Re: Re: Question:

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  73.  
    icon
    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 9:09am

    Oh, you poor deluded person you.

    There's a spectacularly good reason that cell phone rates and assorted goodies cost more in North America (Canada and the Unites States) than just about anywhere else in the world. It's that what regulation does exist, minimal as you point out, is expressly designed so that to poor, hard done by carriers can stuff themselves full of badly needed moola to encourage the growth of the cell phone market.

    After all Verizon isn't exactly a wealthy company, you know. The same line of reasoning is employed by the alleged regulator when it comes to Internet access which is why we pay more for that than just about anyone else on the planet.

    Compare this to the wild west world of European cell phone regulation (mostly lack of it) where there's something called actual competition taking place, lower rates and better services. They pay less for Internet access, too, for much the same reason. (Not completely the same but the same notion that competition is good for the industry and customer.)

    it's a sad, sad day when a regulation happy market like the EU, which regulates the curvature of bananas, has something to teach us on this side of the pond about this strange thing called competition.

    This dynamic, incidentally, has a name. It's called "regulatory capture" wherein the regulator stops doing the things it is supposed to do. including ensuring protection of subscribers/customers/suckers, and starts to regulate for the exclusive benefit of those it's supposed to be keeping a critical eye on.

    All of which is wonderful for the regulated and provides a nice soft landing zone for regulators when they leave "public" service and somehow find themselves working in cushy jobs pulling down 6 figures working for those they formerly regulated.

    In there turn the regulated will then, after an exhaustive search, return the favour by filling the vacancy left when one of the regulators left their position.

    This is done because the subject is so complex that only those intimately familiar with it are capable of understanding it. And only those who are in the industry being regulated are, therefore, eligible for the job.

    All this is done with great thought, consideration and careful deliberation so that the regulator may continue on its true mission of making near monopoly or monopoly carriers insanely wealthy.

    The mere act of opening your bill, realizing that you're on a diet of KD and wieners for another month due to this isn't enough for we mere mortals to understand or to fully appreciate the elegant logic involved. Remember, it's for our own good!

    If all of this sounds all too familiar it's because it is. It's the same dynamic applied by the entertainment industry and other IP maximalists when they "educate" politicians on the troubles their industry faces when the digital equivalent of Sir Francis Drake sails over the horizon with guns blazing. That said eduction occurs in the form of campaign financing is a mere quibble, a tiny dot on the horizon of how the world is supposed to work something, again, we mere mortals are incapable of comprehending.

    After all, we can't comprehend that creativity doesn't JUST happen, you know. That Bower bird over yonder has to know that at the end of the day and all his hard work in creating a beautiful, colourful bower won't just attract a mate but more importantly that he can patent his design so the lazy Bower bird next door won't pirate it.

    That's such subtle, elegant logic that mortals (customers) are incapable of comprehending it. Nor appreciate it. And while the priesthood of entertainment will provide enough so that a select group of legislators can put food on their plates the rest of us will just have to get by on what we can scrape up from their food scraps.
    {sarcasm off -- maybe}

     

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  74.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 9:31am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    "Do you have any reasons to be curious about rectal exams, enemas, colonoscopies or fecal transplants?"

    You described Mike's posting style perfectly. Ask him.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  75.  
    icon
    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 9:39am

    Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    "Religion is that which you cannot compromise over. I think it very aptly describes politics in America today."

    Actually religion itself is full of compromises. A quick glance at the margins of the Hebrew Bible (Old Testament) with commentary is enough to illustrate that. Two or three thousand years of rabbi's arguing about what a particular comma in a particular sentence really means or the continuing animated discussion of whether or not The Song of Solomon is a love song to the church/synagogue/temple or exactly what it appears to be -- biblical soft core porn.

    It's orthodoxy that can't be compromised. The given orthodoxy of a given sect/denomination/cult is its identity, at least that's what those dictating such orthodoxy think, Not that it's way to control, that would never happen!

    Take, for example, the orhtodoxy of some of those on the right who say that increased taxation is automatically bad. While it may have a glimmer of truth behind it, more than a mere glimmer actually, there comes a time where increased taxation may be or IS the only way out when a country is up to it's eyeballs in debt, for example. Those clinging to said orthodoxy won't even see that much less consider it and prefer bankruptcy to a penny in tax increases. All this accompanied by the ripping and tearing of hair shirts, wailing and gnashing of teeth and other ritual responses which have long since lost all meaning. In the meantime the rest of the religion in question has moved on, compromised, adapted and come to admit that while "no new taxes" is a wonderful slogan there comes a time when there's no choice and that there might, just MIGHT be a way to compromise by making sure they aren't permanent.
    Of course, this will run headlong into the orthodoxy of the bureaucratic religion who know only that thier task is ensure that temporary becomes permanent and continues on to, lo, the seventh generation at least but that's a unique species that has existed since humans first settled in cities and for 10,000 years at least we have been unable to rid ourselves of them.

     

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  76.  
    icon
    Marcus Carab (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 10:06am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    It's kind of sad that you think the terms you use are "vivid" or that they have any impact at all.

    You stood up and declared your allegiance to darryl for chrissakes. We all pity you a great deal.

     

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  77.  
    icon
    Richard (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 11:01am

    Re:

    t looks like Fat Bastard used 3 second verbal sound bites, not performances, for that megaupload video. Not only did UMG nothave the right to pull it, but I think they just received^H^H^H^H^^H^H^H^H handed out some free ammunition.

    FTFY

     

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  78.  
    icon
    Hephaestus (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 12:22pm

    DH, way to troll the trolls! You even woke the dead, and brought darryl back. Kudos

     

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  79.  
    icon
    Greevar (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 1:35pm

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Predictable troll is predictable.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  80.  
    icon
    Greevar (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 1:40pm

    Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Two Darryls and Larry. "Hi, I'm Larry. This is my brother Darryl. This is my other brother Darryl."

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  81.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 1:56pm

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Man, if you need help just ask.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  82.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 11th, 2011 @ 2:03pm

    Re: Re: Re:

    Feel free to join:

    Ray Miles v. State of Kansas; Kansas Highway Patrol; Capitol Police, Case No. 5:11 cv 4180 (D. Kan. (Topeka), filed Dec. 8, 2011).

    If you don't want pirates near you.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  83.  
    icon
    Jay (profile), Dec 11th, 2011 @ 11:27pm

    Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    I'm going to be using that all the time...

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  84.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 12th, 2011 @ 2:14am

    "The United States Government, so long the pride of the world" - ????? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.. oh my god the tears, the tears... ha ha ha ha ha

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  85.  
    identicon
    John Doe, Dec 12th, 2011 @ 5:02am

    Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    there comes a time where increased taxation may be or IS the only way out when a country is up to it's eyeballs in debt, for example

    Did cutting the out of control spending ever cross your mind as an option?

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  86.  
    icon
    The Devil's Coachman (profile), Dec 12th, 2011 @ 5:38am

    Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Old people! It was a long time ago. Looks like the long term memory is going now, too.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  87.  
    identicon
    Anonymous Coward, Dec 12th, 2011 @ 8:51am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Kind of sad that the "comment of the week" stuff keeps piling up and making you think that anyone gives a crap about you.

    I didn't "declared your allegiance to darryl". Why do you have to be such a raving idiot at times?

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  88.  
    icon
    Marcus Carab (profile), Dec 12th, 2011 @ 11:08am

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    I didn't "declared your allegiance to darryl"

    That's some quality writing right there.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  89.  
    icon
    TtfnJohn (profile), Dec 12th, 2011 @ 3:37pm

    Re: Re: Re: Re: The Mantra !!!!

    Speaking of religious mantra, of course it did. I'm not a complete fool. (Bit snarky at the moment though.)

    You gotta do both if you want to balance a budget and get out of a debt hole such as the United States is in, for example.

    Congress, it seems, wants to do neither. Mostly the Republicans, or a fair whack of them who quote the no new taxes mantra, want to do neither. Cut spending? Sure everywhere. whoops, don't touch the military or out other pet programs. Can't go to any of those though those budgetary items are wildly out of control. Nope, not that, not there. In fact we need to increase our spending on toys for the boys. Never mind that by several orders of magnitude we have the most powerful military on earth!

    In their own way the Democrats are no better. At least they don't totally rule out the other side of the equation. That's where the political religion comes into play.

    John Doe? Amonyomous Coward. Sheesh.

    Thanks, though.

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]


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