Microsoft Wants A Patent For Saying 'Goodbye'

from the bye-now dept

theodp writes "Demonstrating its commitment to high-quality U.S. patents, Microsoft has submitted a just-published patent application to the USPTO for Automatic Goodbye Messages. By automatically sending messages like ‘Have a great afternoon!’, ‘Sorry, I have got to go!’, ‘Have a terrific day!’, ‘Ciao, Harry!’, or even a simple ‘Bye!’ at the end of an IM session, Microsoft explains, one avoids insulting a converser with whom a conversation is ended. Hopefully the USPTO will give this one the quick buh-bye it deserves."

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Comments on “Microsoft Wants A Patent For Saying 'Goodbye'”

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30 Comments
Adam says:

How companies come up with some of these patents

Many of you wouldn’t criticise Microsoft and other companies if you knew the delicate and timely process it takes to come up with these patents.

*Take 2 college students (not necesarily particularly bright ones),
*Provide them a writing pad, and 2 #2 pencils (Must be #2 pencils)
*Give them a few joints, and allow 30 minutes to “Bake”.

*Ask them to write down 100 of the most obvious things that are done today.

Company X then painstakinly goes over this list, looking for blatantly obvious statements that they do themselves. Search for an existing patent and if none exists, WAMO! They’re in business.

It sadens me that many of you mock the system and just don’t full understand and appreciate this time tested complex method.

Bald Pate-NT (user link) says:

Thomas Edison Never Got a Microsoft Goodbye

These patents shouldn’t be classified in the same legal structure as innovation. If a patent is hilarious, it should be put in a different stack.

If anything, they could be allowed simply to prevent big corporate targets from massive, frivolous, infringement liability.

Creatively-stoned college students just don’t have the legal resources to file and defend their originality. Or the time–where does it go? Microsoft’s crazy baldheads are getting chased out of town anyway.

byte^me says:

IRC already had, but.....

While I agree that IRC has had this feature for years, you are missing one serious problem – who at the USPTO is going to have any clue what IRC *IS*, let alone that clients already offered this feature?

Because of that, I would not be surprised if this is approved. It would be another example of the shining stupidity of government bureaucracy……

Mystified Mind says:

Patent reform

How about this? All patent applications must be published and made openly available to the public for at least 180 days prior to review by patent reviewers in order to provide an adequate exposure of prior art.

Or, better yet, go back to requiring all applications to include a working model. No more theoretical crap. Prove your idea works.

Jon says:

Why they do this...

Microsoft, and most big companies for that matter, don’t file patents to make money off of royalties, or to sue people who infringe on them so they can make a pretty penny in settlements. They file as many patents as possible so that no other companies sue them. Basically, Microsoft, and IBM and Google, and Cisco and all other big companies have a truce of some sort, “we won’t sue you, so you don’t sue us since we all have technology that infringes on each other’s patents.”

It’s important for all of these companies to continually file new patents so that none of the companies get too far ahead of the other ones, and thus would have a leg up in a legal battle. Think of it like the cold war. And I’m serious — this is why all these companies file for seemingly stupid patents all the time.

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