Man Sues Cable Company For Fat Wife And Lazy Kids

from the no,-seriously dept

It reads like a parody, but, unfortunately it appears to be real. I’m still waiting to read that this is just a very early April Fool’s joke, but this article (found at broadbandreports) says that a man in Wisconsin is suing Charter, his local cable company, for making his wife fat and his children lazy channel surfers. His argument is that he called to have the cable disconnected in 1999 – and Charter stopped charging him, but kept the cable service going. He claims that he and his whole family became addicted to the free cable, which has led to all sorts of problems: “I believe that the reason I smoke and drink every day and my wife is overweight is because we watched TV every day for the last four years.” I’d say this one may beat out previous lawsuits for the perfect example of how people simply refuse to take responsibility for their own actions. Please, someone, tell me it’s a joke.


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Comments on “Man Sues Cable Company For Fat Wife And Lazy Kids”

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17 Comments
OldYeller says:

...and the puishment fits the crime?

Not a joke, I’m afraid. The real punchline is that the guy’s proposed “remedy” for being turned into TV-watching couch potatoes is to be set up for life as web-browsing couch potatoes.

Not that this should ever reach a court, but in a perfect world the “remedy” would simply be disconnecting their cable and providing them each with a new set of walking shoes.

Of course, you could always send them a punitive message by hooking them up with Richard Simmons…

Cigamit says:

No Subject Given

So does the guy just not know that the TV has both a Power Button and a Power Cord? Both are effective in turning off the TV. And if that doesn’t stop the situation, there is always the ability to unscrew, or heaven forbid, cut the cable line. But ofcourse, just from him filing this lawsuit, I can tell that he doesn’t have enough intelligence to know about these complicated methods.

What is the world coming too?

msykes says:

Re: No Subject Given

Forget unplugging it, if this guy really cared about his family he would take an f-ing hammer to the TV. I think that we need a new law where if you file a lawsuit and it’s found to be completely without merit like most of these new-wave american lawsuits are, you have to pay some fraction of the amount sought in the suit to some charity, or the government or someone.

msykes

LittleW0lf says:

People this stupid shouldn't be allowed to breed

This guy gets 4 years of free cable, and he threatens an employee of the cable company and demands $5000 or three computers and a life time supply of cable internet. The good thing is that there is a police report on his threats, so a judge can laugh him out of court.

I hope his lack of intelligence was a fluke in his family tree and that his kids drank far more from the IQ juice than he did.

If anything, the cable company should send him a bill for four years of free cable…sure, he won’t pay for it, and no judge would force him to pay because it was their screw-up…but he obviously didn’t complain to them about receiving cable for free over the past four years. If I didn’t want the cable, I’d unplug it, and if I noticed that they still hadn’t shut it off, I would tell them every week that it is still active.

Tracey Stevens (user link) says:

Free Cable for 4 years

I found this story intriguing because last year I called the cable company to shut off my cable because I was addicted to TV. Now I still have a TV but no rabbit ears or cable and my quality of life has improved immensely. However, a week after I had the cable company pick up the box, they called to offer me FREE CABLE for a YEAR. After I said no thanks, they sent a letter with the same offer. I think the cable companies are conspiring to control what’s left of our minds. They don’t care if we pay for it, as long as we watch plenty of commercials. People, if you want free cable, tell the cable company you want to shut it off because it’s rotting your brain. They’ll give it to you for free so you can get out there and buy a bunch of s**t you don’t need.

Jim Kotsonis says:

Fat and Lazy

Nope, no joke. The, very intelligent and straight faced, judge in charge of this waste of time lawsuit told the gentlemen in question that he and his family have nothing more to blame then themselves. In my opinion the lawyer of this case should be disbarred and publicly flogged. This is the kind of problems that our society on a whole is suffering from. We are amongst the fattest people in the world and all we do is blame others for it. Take a stand and get the heck out of your homes and play ball, walk, anything. Don’t blame others for your lack of self control.

Fatsuperman says:

Community for People that Have Fat wives/husbands

There is a web based support site of sorts for people with fat spouses.

It isn’t judgmental like most web sites where they accuse the thin spouse of being shallow, and you don’t see the “dump the fat bi**ch rhetoric that is so common too. Real people with real fat spouses.

myfatspouse(dot)com

its not spam, the web site isn’t selling anything so there is nothing to gain , I’m just trying to help people out

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