Prospectus for Silicon Valley's Next Hot Tech IPO

from the risk-factors dept

With people still talking about the mess of Facebook's IPO, it's been causing other companies problems as well -- including a series of postponed IPOs. However, the folks over at McSweeney's have uncovered the S-1 filing for what could possibly be the next hot IPO. As they note, this is one "where nothing could possibly go wrong." If you're into reading these kinds of things, check out the full prospectus. Or just sample the risk factors here:
An investment in Ponzify involves significant risks.

User metrics
A significant portion of our income is derived from advertisers who still buy this whole “clicks” and “page count” business. Thus, we plan a vigorous defense of our current metrics while making up new ones with impressive-sounding names. For instance, KonBuy (short for “Konfirmation Bias”) scores the popularity of apps and websites based on whether their titles are intentionally misspelled portmanteaus.

Age Factor
Our CEO, CFO, COO and a bunch of other acronyms were all born after Nirvana released “Nevermind”.

Experience
Did you watch that two-part Frontline special on PBS about the inside story of the global financial crisis? We did. We were like “Dude, that’s like what we’re doing!”
If only real prospectuses read this way...

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  1. identicon
    Hans, 12 Jun 2012 @ 12:46am

    Who will ever buy into something called 'ConBuy'?

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  2. icon
    harbingerofdoom (profile), 12 Jun 2012 @ 2:34am

    Management is fine, its the company you should be worried about

    lol

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  3. identicon
    abc gum, 12 Jun 2012 @ 5:44am

    I propose a new metric for measurement of the dot-bomb potential. I would call it the bubble factor. On a scale of one to ten, how artificially inflated is this market?

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

  4. icon
    Cory Janssen (profile), 20 Jun 2012 @ 7:40am

    Re:

    7-8

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]


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