Bob Murray Sends Judge Whiny Letter Saying That Losing Case To John Oliver Is Making People Say Mean Things To Him

from the consume-defication,-bob dept

Thought the whole Bob Murray / John Oliver story was over with the judge making it clear Murray had no case and preparing to dismiss the whole thing? It appears that Murray cannot let it go. As first spotted by YouTubing lawyer Leonard French, Murray (not his lawyers) sent the judge a letter whining about the whole thing (check out French's video for a wonderful dramatic reading of the letter):

Or just go check out the letter yourself (kudos to French for getting the document and posting it and doing the dramatic read, shame on the West Virginia courts for not having web-accessible electronic records, and a plea to French to stop putting lame ugly watermarks on public documents). Of course, the reason the letter is public is that (1) parties are not supposed to talk to the judge about their case without telling the other side, and (2) parties are not supposed to communicate with the court directly, rather than via their attorneys. And, thus, the judge added Murray's letter to the docket in the case, along with a bit of a benchslap:

This date the Court received the attached unsolicited missive from the Plaintiff, Robert E. Murray. As it does not appear Mr. Murray forwarded copies of the same to Defense Counsel, pursuant to Rule 2.9(B) of the West Virginia Rules of Judicial Conduct, the Court has copied and enclosed the correspondence herein and filed the original in the Court's file.

Mr. Murray's letter is an improper ex parte communication with the Court, therefore the request to reconsider the Court's decision cannot and will not be entertained.

The Court respectfully requests Plaintiffs' Counsel to advise Mr. Murray against future ex parte correspondence which could result in sanctions against the Plaintiffs in this matter.

In other words: don't do this shit, Bob.

But, of course, the real joy is in Murray's letter itself, which is absolutely hilarious. It starts off talking about how disappointed he is in the ruling, which, sure, is understandable but it's totally improper to send a personal letter to the judge about it.

We are deeply disappointed to learn that you intend to dismiss our lawsuit against Home Box Office, Inc., Time Warner Inc., Mr. John Oliver, and others (collectively "Defendants"). We will appeal that decision in due course.

Right. If you (stupidly) decide to appeal this, your lawyers should appeal it in due course. Reaching out to the judge on your own is... not part of that "due course."

The jobs of our 6,000 coal miners depend on me and my reputation.

Right, then maybe you shouldn't have done a bunch of things that caused John Oliver and many others to mock you. And those mockable things include suing John Oliver for mocking you in the first place. Because the "harm" to your reputation was caused by you -- not John Oliver. There is no right in this country not to have people mock you, and considering how frequently Murray seems to be flag waving about how proud he is to be an American, he might want to take some time to read the First Amendment of the Constitution.

So, if 6,000 coal miner jobs really depend on your reputation (which, also: citation needed), then perhaps the first thing you should do is improve your reputation (pro tip: sending a hilariously dumb letter to the judge in your case does the opposite of improving your reputation).

My name is on the Company, and I am the one who our 140 lenders, our utility customers, the regulators, and the public look to in order to keep these jobs. You have enabled the Defendants to further destroy our miners' families. We write you today to inform you of the continued personal attack and harassment by the Defendants in this case.

If your lenders and customers bail because John Oliver made fun of you, perhaps there are larger issues at play. And, of course, Murray presents no evidence that any such lender, customer, regulator or anyone else has done anything to the company as a result of Oliver's story, or the ruling in this case.

As for "continued personal attacks," again I have to point you to the First Amendment. Personal attacks are protected. Making fun of you is protected. Telling you to "eat shit, Bob" is protected. This isn't even close. Telling the court that just told you such things are protected that such "personal attacks" have continued is not a compelling argument. It suggests someone is acting like a sore loser without even understanding why he lost.

Just because you feel bad, Bob, it doesn't make it illegal.

Indeed, just yesterday, the Defendants aired worldwide the enclose attack on the undersigned and our Compay, whereby John Oliver taunted us, once again, stating "Eat Sh-t Bob" and announcing that, once your order is issued, he will "gloat" and he will be "rubbing it in the face of the person that lost over and over again."

Oooooooooooooh. He taunted you again. I mean, that's positively Pythonesque, and we all know how King Arthur v. French Knight turned out, don't we?

This clearly demonstrates the vindictiveness and intentional destruction that the Defendants have caused.

No. It means that you were mocked, had such thin skin that you sued in a case that you quickly lost, and thus were called out on filing a bad case (pretty mildly too, frankly). It doesn't show "vindictiveness." You know what shows vindictiveness? Suing a television comedian for reporting on your antics because you don't like how you were portrayed. And, really, if anyone's trying to "destroy" anyone, I think that honor must go to the person who sued someone for making fun of them, demanding "general damages," "special damages," "punitive damages," "attorneys' fees" and "a permanent injunction" against the person who made fun of you.

It shows that these attacks will continue in perpetuity, as a result of your order.

No, not as a result of the order. As a result of you doing silly, mockable things up to and including filing a lawsuit over someone expressing their opinion that things you did were silly and mockable.

I am a dying old man, but our employees will pay for your decision.

Nice baseless appeal to emotion. But, of course, if you're dying, then how does your earlier statement about how all these employees relying on your reputation for their jobs make sense? Does that mean once you die they're all out of work? If so, isn't that a bigger threat to their jobs?

Further, since your ruling, we have been subjected to multiple insulting and threatening email and telephone messages, including these: "BOB, KISS MY A--"' "Hey Bob, I guess John Oliver f---ed you in your a--. You are a real evil piece of s--t"; "Consume defecation, Bob."; "What an old and selfish c--t of a human being. You and your industry are no longer relevant and the entire world knows it."; "Congratulations on having HBO make you look like a big fat lardass loser in court. Idiot.;" And "Ha ha you fat pig, you lost your lawsuit... burn in hell dr. evil." This is a very small sampling of the flagrant and extremely damaging personal attacks that we continue to receive on a daily basis.

First off, Bob, thank you for sharing those. We never would have seen them otherwise. I'm assuming that Bob self-censored the dashes in the curse words, which is nice of him. But, really, the "consume defecation, Bob" statement is a really tremendous work of art.

Oh, and Bob, defamation is not "people made fun of me and I'm sad." It requires false statements of fact made with actual malice. That's not what's happening. And you don't even bother to allege that's what's happening, because it isn't.

Accordingly, we respectfully request that you reconsider your decision to dismiss this lawsuit and allow this case to proceed on the merits.

What merits? There are no merits, which is what the judge has already made clear.

Indeed, this lawsuit is extremely important to our employees, who rely on Murray Energy and me for their continued livelihoods, and to our lenders, customers, and suppliers who depend on our integrity and performance. We cannot sit idly and allow our jobs and livelihoods to be destroyed by the cruel and baseless attacks of these defendants.

Wait. This lawsuit -- in which a key part is about John Oliver quoting one of your employees writing "Eat Shit Bob" on a bonus check he was voiding over safety concerns -- is "important" to your employees? You sure about that, Bob?

And, again, it's not the people making fun of you that's "destroying livelihoods."

The ACLU of West Virginia's Legal Director, Jamie Lynn Crofts, put out a nice statement in response to all of this:

“Other than the fact that Bob Murray’s case against John Oliver is a ridiculous attempt to quell speech by abusing our legal system, it really is the gift that keeps on giving. With the disdain Mr. Murray has shown for our constitution and our legal system, I’m not surprised that he would also improperly try to influence a judge in this way (or with such a hilarious letter). Unfortunately for Bob, everything John Oliver has said on his show was and continues to be protected speech. It is, in fact, legal for anyone to say, ‘Consume defecation, Bob.'”

Yes, all together now: Consume Defecation, Bob.


Reader Comments

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  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:18pm

    In other words: don't do this shit, Bob.

    And in other, other words: eat shit, Bob.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:24pm

    Eat shit, Bob.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    mcinsand, 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:25pm

    Sad news for popcorn futures

    Given the lack of any rational basis for the lawsuit, we sadly will have to look at more intelligent (or simply less stupid) litigants for our entertainment.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Miles (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:27pm

    I am Grateful for Bob Murray

    I for one am grateful for Bob Murray. He has provided me with hours and hours of high quality entertainment.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 8:13pm

      Re: I am Grateful for Bob Murray

      > He has provided me with hours and hours of high quality entertainment.

      Now he's going to want you to pay him.

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Jordan, 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:39pm

    Employees

    Diving his money between his 6000 employees should ensure them some financial stability

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Oblate (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:45pm

    I don't think we've seen the last of this moron, maybe Bob will write directly to the appellate court judge, before his case is there.

    Oh, and devour dung, dipsh-t.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:54pm

    Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

    "John Oliver taunted us, once again"

    Whaaaaaaa

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 12:57pm

    the act of a simply pathetic individual!!

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    TasMot (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 1:06pm

    Maybe Bob can sue HBO under Turkish law as a Erdoğan? Is he related in any way besides the whiny attitude?

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    ECA (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 1:10pm

    SOP(standard oporatin procedure)

    In the last 20+ years..
    Those 6000 Employees...
    Tends to be 500 Hard working Blue collar..
    5500 People doing White collar paper work..and getting paid Good money..
    and 1-=10 persons on TOP getting paid ALLOT of money..

    A few years back, my area had the Coal industry make a proposition to install a Coal fire plant(OLD STYLE).. The Comment to them was very QUICK..(we live in a farming area).
    If this had been the NEWER type coal plant, we might have one NOW..but 2 states over would not like us very much..

    For anyone that dont know..
    Years ago, it was shown that the EAST COAST Coal plants pollution was dropping in the Black forests in the EU.. As ACID RAIN..(Sulfuric acid). And we cut back THEN.. Or be Sued by another nation..

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      ECA (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 1:18pm

      Re: SOP(standard oporatin procedure)

      In recent history...For SOME ODD REASONING..
      We have cut back MANY(more then allot) of the Public health and Pollution laws..
      Its asif, SOMEONE FORGOT WHY we placed them in use.

      ROC, TAIWAN, JAPAN, have cut Manufacturing business ALLOT..
      WHY?? they LIKE FISHING OFF THE COAST LINES..
      They like to Farm Their OWN FOOD..
      They DONT LIKE, building cities ON TOP OF DUMPS, that have buried Chemicals in them, that give your kids, 2-3 EXTRA LIMBS..
      Forget Chernobyl, we had pollution sites ALL OVER THIS COUNTRY, and most are NOT CLEANED UP YET.. Love Canal is one of them.. Lake ERIE, and Michigan, River and lake fires..
      Anyone think that Oil spills are BAD...THEY HAVE HAD WORSE.,.in other countries and a Stream across the pacific..

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Uriel-238 (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 1:30pm

    The schadenfreude. It's so tasty.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 2:01pm

    Eat shit blue.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 2:41pm

    who is emailing and calling Bob?

    Who is taking the time to call this guy just to insult him? Bob Murray might be an asshole, but the people doing that are as well.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 4:35pm

      Re: who is emailing and calling Bob?

      I'm sure they're devastated.

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      That One Guy (profile), 27 Mar 2018 @ 3:58am

      Telling me 'you can't do that' just makes me want to do it MORE

      Funny thing is that before he tried to silence John Oliver via legal threat and lawsuit the only person I'm aware of that had bothered with the 'eat shit bob' schtict was his own employee.

      After he sued in an attempt to make sure that John Oliver couldn't ever say that thing to him, while it may not be very mature for people to exercise the free speech that Murray doesn't want them to have, it's not surprising that they are doing so.

      He went legal in an attempt to curb-stomp someone's free speech simply because it got under his micron-thin skin and bruised his oh-so-sensitive ego, it's his own gorram fault that he's now getting it shoved in his face that people can in fact offend him.

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 27 Mar 2018 @ 6:41am

      Re: who is emailing and calling Bob?

      Who is emailing and calling Bob?
      Himself?

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

      • icon
        Toom1275 (profile), 27 Mar 2018 @ 7:15am

        Re: Re: who is emailing and calling Bob?

        It wouldn't be the first time I've seen someone claiming to be a harrassment victim having received the nasty emails from a harrasser residing at the IP address 127.0.0
        1.

        reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    PeterScott (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 2:53pm

    Wow. That's like preschool level whining.

    Johnny is is still making fun of me...

    Did his mother never tell him about "Sticks and Stones"?

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 3:05pm

    Minor quibble

    The ACLU made one minor mistake. It isn't legal for "anyone" to tell him to eat shit. If a doctor giving medical advice tells him to do so as professional advice, that isn't legal. Other than that ...

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 3:18pm

      Re: Minor quibble

      Actually, the doctors have discovered that gut bugs are important to health, and they do prescribe shit to patients where they need to introduce those bugs.

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 4:04pm

        Re: Re: Minor quibble

        Fecal transplant. And you are literally eating shit. Granted it's not done in a Human Centipede fashion.

        reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    DOlz (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 3:14pm

    Is Bob Murray coprophagous? Just asking.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Toom1275 (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 4:07pm

    Eat Bob, shit.

    Wait, did I get those two mixed up? They're so indistinguisuable it's hard to tell.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Pixelation, 26 Mar 2018 @ 4:10pm

    Hey Bob...

    I fart in your general direction. Now, go away before I taunt you a second time.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Stan (profile), 26 Mar 2018 @ 5:04pm

    Consume defecation

    ACLU's Jamie Lynn Crofts: "It is, in fact, legal for anyone to say, ‘Consume defecation, Bob.'”

    Maybe legal, however...defecation is an act, not an end-product.

    Ingest feces, Bob.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Suzanne Milligan, 26 Mar 2018 @ 5:57pm

    Oh Bob....

    feast on feces

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Cowardly Lion, 27 Mar 2018 @ 5:57am

      Re: Oh Bob....

      Gobble the guano, Bob.

      This is now the legacy of a dying old man; plates of poop served up by a 7ft squirrel called Mr. Nutterbutter.

      reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 6:07pm

    I am a dying old man

    i can't decide whether this is a guilt trip or a tease.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 6:20pm

    out_of_the_blue's not going to like this, is he?

    Ha ha!

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 26 Mar 2018 @ 9:20pm

    P&L dependent on a comedian?

    Oh come on.....Whether or not a company can mine coal does NOT depend on late night jokes or talk shows. Having miners die in a mine collapse has a far greater affect on the business.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Agammamon, 26 Mar 2018 @ 11:19pm

    I misread this as Bill Murray

    And thought - hey, this ought to be funny.

    Then I thought, what lawsuit against John Oliver and why are people saying mean things to Bill for?

    And then I realized my mistake and you know what? Its still funny, only now I'm laughing *at* Bob instead of with Bill.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    That One Guy (profile), 27 Mar 2018 @ 4:21am

    Keep digging Bob

    He really is the gift that keeps on giving.

    Throws fits when people say mean things about him(funny), tries to shut them up via lawsuits(not so funny), and then when his baseless attempts at legal thuggery are rightly dismissed as nothing more than hot air and whining he doubles down and tries the exact same arguments only this time presenting them in a very improper way directly to a judge, as though said judge didn't already dismiss his pathetic attempts at arguing his case(or lack thereof as it may be) on emotional, rather than legal grounds.

    I somehow get the feeling that he has gone a long time without someone telling him 'No' or honestly telling him what they think about him, and having it happen so publicly is resulting in this little entertaining meltdown.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 27 Mar 2018 @ 8:47am

    I believe we're all missing the important question here...

    What Lord of the Rings character does Bob look like to go with the Turkish Gollum?

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    See the Moose, 27 Mar 2018 @ 12:52pm

    I demand to see your master

    Hey Bob,

    I have it on good authority that you mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries.

    Oh, and Eat Shit Bob!

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 27 Mar 2018 @ 4:14pm

    Devour excrement, Bob.

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Eat Shit Bob, 20 Apr 2018 @ 2:01pm

    Consume Defacation Bob

    Eat shit, Bob Murray. Fucktard. :)

    reply to this | link to this | view in chronology ]


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