Rudy Giuliani To Head Up Trump's Cybersecurity Team As The Internet Laughs At Giuliani's Security Bona Fides

from the sigh dept

Our soon-to-be American President has made quite a show about bolstering the country’s efforts for cybersecurity. The “cyber”, as he is wont to call the issue, is claimed to be in disrepair and requires brave new minds to protect the country’s computer systems from hacks and attacks from outside forces. We’ve already discussed in the past how depressing it is to learn just how little actual computer science knowledge exists floating in the minds of our elected leaders and their top-level appointees. There is an opportunity to get very smart, very well-educated people on matters of cybersecurity involved in government.

But it appears that Trump is choosing instead to pass on that opportunity, instead tapping Rudy Giuliani to head up his cybersecurity task force. Giuliani runs a consulting firm that claims to be involved in cybersecurity, of course, except that the extent of its work on the subject appears to be the claims that it does so.

Giuliani does head a consulting firm in New York called Giuliani Partners that supposedly focuses on cybersecurity, but Vice’s Motherboard reported yesterday, it’s tough to tell what they actually do, and it’s even tougher to tell what Giuliani does for them, besides being the face of the operation while saying outrageous things on television.

As Motherboard’s Jason Koebler and Lorenzo Franceschi-Bicchierai wrote, “Unlike many other cybersecurity firms, Giuliani Partners does not publish white papers about malware and large-scale hacks, or push for increased adoption of encryption, which would enhance cybersecurity across the board. In fact, it doesn’t talk much about cybersecurity at all, instead choosing to focus on its more traditional anti-crime consulting work.”

So we’re off to a great start. Instead of bringing in someone with actual knowledge and experience in cybersecurity, the President Elect has instead put a cybersecurity cosplayer in charge. And not even a particularly good impersonator of a cybersecurity expert, it seems, as the internet has already begun poking fun at the security measures, or lack thereof, Giuliani Consulting has deployed for its own website.

We might be better off if Trump decided to employ one of the four-hundred pound slobs in their mother’s basement he’s referenced previously, as they seem to have a better handle on the very basics of web security than Giuliani. And they’d probably be cheaper as well, as the former mayor is on the record that his “cybersecurity firm” was more a venture of opportunism than one of added value for his clients.

Look, combating risks on “the cyber” (sigh) may indeed require a high-profile face, if only for the purposes of reassurance and PR. Sadly, those purposes are not fulfilled by a former mayor with a cybersecurity company that doesn’t do cybersecurity, even for its own website.

Filed Under: , ,

Rate this comment as insightful
Rate this comment as funny
You have rated this comment as insightful
You have rated this comment as funny
Flag this comment as abusive/trolling/spam
You have flagged this comment
The first word has already been claimed
The last word has already been claimed
Insightful Lightbulb icon Funny Laughing icon Abusive/trolling/spam Flag icon Insightful badge Lightbulb icon Funny badge Laughing icon Comments icon

Comments on “Rudy Giuliani To Head Up Trump's Cybersecurity Team As The Internet Laughs At Giuliani's Security Bona Fides”

Subscribe: RSS Leave a comment
44 Comments
Max says:

Re: Cybersecurity Leader

I’m wondering if they ever bothered to also tell him that (at least on SD cards) the write protect is an INDICATION (“please don’t write on me would you”) rather than something actually ENFORCED by the card’s hardware. It’s entirely up to the card controller hardware and the software in charge of it whether they chose to respect that…

Anonymous Coward says:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/01/13/giuliani_joomla_outdated_site/

Perfect guy to run the cyber thingy.

But that’s not the funny part, no. How could it be, when we’re talking about Drumpf’s cyber thingy? There’s got to be more…

If you actually try to navigate to giulianisecurity.com you get a (wait for it…) server not found error.

One can only wonder why.

Roger Strong (profile) says:

Re: Re:

Keep in mind that the architect of Trump’s presidency – his Karl Rove – is Steve Bannon of Breitbart, a champion of white supremacists.

"I’m Leninist. Lenin wanted to destroy the state, and that’s my goal too. I want to bring everything crashing down, and destroy all of today’s establishment…

– chief Trump strategist Steve Bannon, to a Daily Beast reporter in 2013

Now he’s systematically appointing people to lead government departments who want to tear down those departments.

This is what makes the PeeOTUS claim so scary: No-one would be foolish enough NOT to expect someone like Trump to be spied on in that particular suite. If the allegation is true, it could only mean that Trump WANTS to inflict maximum damage on the US government.

Which sounds insane, but its consistent with his cabinet appointments and other decisions.

TruthHurts (profile) says:

Check the bad hair-piece...

I hate to say this, but I think Russian hackers have taken over the PeotUS. During a recent upgrade of his hairpiece, Russian hackers implanted dermal transducers and a hot-air charger to keep them powered up.

Now, all they have to do is sit back, relax inside their siberian prison and type “I think it, you say it.”

It’s the only thing that makes sense out of the Cheetoh faced shit-gibbon’s decisions to put the people in charge of the government entities that he has.

Seriously, for each assignment, it’s as if he and/or his staff have gone out of their way to find *the* *absolute* *worst* *candidate* *possbile* and then selected them.

In my opinion, each and every one of his decisions have been akin to putting a convicted child molester in charge of the local daycare.

Wendy Cockcroft (user link) says:

Re: Typical

Agreed. Next up: anarchy (lack of governance via lack of government) followed by corporate tyranny because the market, in its infinite wisdom, will provide.

They’re not conservative any more (the Dem right wing has taken that role over), they’re anarchists. And anarchy always leads to tyranny by creating a power vacuum that lets them in.

AnonCow says:

Giuliani conversation with staffer

G: The solution is padlocks. More padlocks.

Staffer: Great idea, sir. Encryption is necessary. It really is a high-tech padlock.

G: No, I mean actual padlocks. We need more padlocks. We can lock everything up. Put everything in boxes and then lock it up with padlocks. Not the cheap school gym locker kind, we’ll get those huge industrial worksite padlocks.

Anonimus says:

Please don't fatshame

“We might be better off if Trump decided to employ one of the four-hundred pound slobs in their mother’s basement he’s referenced previously, as they seem to have a better handle on the very basics of web security than Giuliani.”

That was uncalled for. Their weight and residential location are irrelevant. It’s the fact that they are assholes that got them referenced by Trump.

orbitalinsertion (profile) says:

Re: Please don't fatshame

That isn’t Tim fat-shaming, it’s Trump. He’s suggesting that the people Trump is so derisive towards (slurs included) would clearly be better for the job. Which, incidentally, is noted in the statement via the word “referenced”. “someone sitting on their bed that weighs 400 pounds.” It had nothing to do with anyone being assholes, and everything to do with the hack being done by any number of other actors besides Russians.

So maybe you should talk to Trump about that.

Anonymous Coward says:

Re: Re:

I would. I love seeing USA burn the government in effigy for 8 more years! How I missed Bushs entertainment. I love that Trump is openly believing in conspiracy theories over god! That is going to be even more hillary than Hillary. We all know why Bill Clinton would want some on the side after that election campaign! She would have been far too boring for the white crypt.

Roger Strong (profile) says:

Re: Re: Re:2 Re:

There’s also the whole Iraq invasion and war.

For Gulf War I, Bush I gave the professionals in the Pentagon a set of goals and let them handle it. For Gulf War II, Bush II and his band of chickenhawks micromanaged the Pentagon and made the decisions themselves.

It didn’t go well. (Unless you’re Cheney and the other chickenhawks who owned stock in Halliburton/KBR. Small wonder it lasted longer than WWII.)

PaulT (profile) says:

Re: Not that shocking

“All this tells us is that Verio/NTT.net is a crappy hosting provider, not that Giuliani has done anything wrong.”

Rubbish. Nobody thinks that Giuliani personally set up the website. But, he did hire the people who did, who did a bad job and then the site was allowed to fester with major issues that were not fixed. He hired the people who failed, no matter how you look at it.

That is exactly the problem. Nobody thinks that Giuliani is going to personally set up any security, either. But he will be in charge of hiring skilled competent people to do that. If he can’t make sure that the public facing window of his security company is competently set up, what is the policy and government defence he’s in charge of going to look like?

The issue isn’t his personal IT skills, the issue his ability to manage the job at hand – and he has failed miserably.

wereisjessicahyde (profile) says:

What do you expect.....

What do you expect from a soon to be President that seems to have difficulty functioning as a normal human being?

I’m all for democracy but seriously the guy is a fucking fruitcake, with extra nuts. I don’t even live in the US and I’m genuinely worried about how the world is turning.

I wouldn’t trust him to look after the contents of my fridge, never mind the US presidency.

Anonymous Coward says:

Welcome to the new Guliani IT policy.

step 1. in the event of terrorist attack, WOPR (from the movie wargames) will be used to fire missiles at the enemy
step 2. All citizens will be intructed to lift the telephone handset so the internet cuts out.
step 3. A teenage boy will be commanded to ‘cyber hack’ through a wireframe maze, shooting all the enemy firewalls until the screen reads ‘ACCESS GRANTED’ in large green letters.

Roger Strong (profile) says:

Re: Can we get that button yet?

I noticed something undeniably “Sad But True” about my ego while making a “Friend Of Techdirt” donation last night:

My posts occasionally get voted “insightful” or “funny.” On Sunday I made the “Funniest/Most Insightful Comments Of The Week” list again. It turns out that I make larger donations when people laugh at my jokes or call me insightful.

A “Sad But True” button wouldn’t have the same effect.

Anonymous Coward says:

Re: Re: Can we get that button yet?

Well then. I shall pay more attention to your posts and be sure to tag them appropriately and your larger donation can help to make up for my lack of funds

Have an insightful for giving me the idea.

And thank-you! TD needs all the support it can get right now.

Money should not equal speech when someone like billionaire Thiel can accumulate more money in one day for doing nothing(interest), than 50 000 of us will donate in one week.

Add Your Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Have a Techdirt Account? Sign in now. Want one? Register here

Comment Options:

Make this the or (get credits or sign in to see balance) what's this?

What's this?

Techdirt community members with Techdirt Credits can spotlight a comment as either the "First Word" or "Last Word" on a particular comment thread. Credits can be purchased at the Techdirt Insider Shop »

Follow Techdirt

Techdirt Daily Newsletter

Ctrl-Alt-Speech

A weekly news podcast from
Mike Masnick & Ben Whitelaw

Subscribe now to Ctrl-Alt-Speech »
Techdirt Deals
Techdirt Insider Discord
The latest chatter on the Techdirt Insider Discord channel...
Loading...