Creepy Professor Excuses Upskirt Picture-Taking With Creepy Excuse

from the seriously-creepy dept

We've covered plenty of stupid criminal stories in the past, but there's been something missing from those stories. That something is a tone-deaf "excuse" that excuses nothing except the common sense of the perpetrator. Well, wait no longer, because here is your latest idiot criminal, University of Florida professor Don Samuelson, who is accused of using a pen-camera to film his students' naughty bits.

According to the arrest report, the first two of four alleged incidents involve recording down a woman's v-neck shirt. On August 30, one woman became aware of what Samuelson was up to as he attempted filming both down her shirt and up her skirt, between her thighs. The camera pen was seized by police and the portable thumb drive containing the videos included videos of other women working in his lab and meeting in his office.
So, they got him. Like, dead to rights got him. Got him so bad that you would imagine there's no weaseling out of this for Samuelson, right? He'd just have to admit what he did, slink away, and take his punishment like a man. Well, no, friends. Samuelson has an excuse for surrepticiously filming his female students' breasts and between their legs. And, boy, is it ever convincing.
Samuelson admitted the camera pen was his, but insisted he was using it to prove a woman wasn't wearing any undergarments.
In other words: no, officer, I was not trying to get panty and bra shots, I was trying to get vagina and breast shots, duh! That's probably not the kind of thing you want to insist. I'm having trouble coming up with a worse excuse for being a college professor perv-dog than that, and I've been trying to come up with one for at least fifteen minutes. So way to go, Don Samuelson, surely former professor at the University of Florida and possible new admittee to a local correctional facility. You're not only a creepy pervert, you're a dumbass too!



Reader Comments (rss)

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  1.  
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    S. T. Stone, Sep 27th, 2013 @ 5:42pm

    Anyone that dumb deserves everything coming to him.

     

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  2.  
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    Capt ICE Enforcer, Sep 27th, 2013 @ 5:44pm

    school rules

    Sex with students is against school policy. But masturbating while watching video is acceptable.

     

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  3.  
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    Anonymous, Sep 27th, 2013 @ 5:54pm

    He should get a job with the TSA. Is what he did so different than what the TSA does?

     

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  4.  
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    That Anonymous Coward (profile), Sep 27th, 2013 @ 6:22pm

    How... the... what... AHHH

     

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  5.  
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    Ima Fish (profile), Sep 27th, 2013 @ 6:51pm

    I've got three more true court stories.

    The first was a guy who pled guilty for possessing child porn. During the plea he tried to blame it on pop-ups and malware. The judge asked, "If it was all downloaded accidentally, why was so much of it found printed out?

    The defendant said with a straight face, "Your honor, I only printed it out so I could throw it away."

    The second was a guy who was accused of taking hidden-camera videos of his underage step daughter having sex with her boyfriend. Of course he only did it to make sure she was actually having sex with her boyfriend so he could talk to her about it later. He was also accused of giving her enemas when she was much younger, because according to him, she had undiagnosed bowel problems.

    The last is a 50+ year old guy who was babysitting his neighbors' 9 year old daughter. He was caught in bed with her by her parents when they got home. His excuse? He got tired so he stripped completely naked and got into the parents' bed. Then when the 9 year old crawled into bed and started having sex with him in the dark, he assumed it was his 50+ year old, nearly 200 pound wife. He was convicted of first degree criminal sexual conduct and is currently service a life time in prison.

    Apparently pervs have problems telling the truth.

     

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  6.  
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    Ima Fish (profile), Sep 27th, 2013 @ 6:59pm

    Re:

    Ok, one more but no one will probably ever believe it. But here I go.

    This guy was injured while at work and got a pretty good settlement. Since he was home all the time he volunteered to watch the neighborhood kids. Eventually tapes were found of him taking off the girls' clothing, very young girls, like 3 to 5, having oral sex on them, and then redressing them.

    Here's the part you won't believe. The tapes were found when some local criminals decided to break into his house and steal his safe.

    After finally getting it back home and open and finding the videos, these criminals were so disgusted they turned them over to the police and admitted their crimes of breaking and entering and safe cracking. They served time for what they did, but it must have been better than living with what they knew.

     

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  7.  
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    Ima Fish (profile), Sep 27th, 2013 @ 6:59pm

    Re: Re:

    Damn, I forgot to tell you his excuse. You see, he was only playing dress up with the girls. Seriously. That was his excuse.

     

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  8.  
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    Zem, Sep 27th, 2013 @ 7:00pm

    It was a PEN camera!

    If only the university had the same rules as Modesto Junior College. He would have been removed from university grounds long ago.

     

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  9.  
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    Octopus, Sep 27th, 2013 @ 7:06pm

    Pen? (Slaps head.) I thought I was using my PENIS!

    Wait, is that better or worse?

     

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  10.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Sep 27th, 2013 @ 8:22pm

    The way things are going probably we all will be criminals for even talking about, even to make fun out of it and some will call us all dumb for talking about illegal stuff, once the creepy zone stuff expands a little to include more and more and more creepy behavior, who else would talk about creepy stuff than creepy criminals right?

     

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  11.  
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    Matthew Cline (profile), Sep 27th, 2013 @ 10:09pm

    Samuelson admitted the camera pen was his, but insisted he was using it to prove a woman wasn't wearing any undergarments.
    Is there a school rule saying that students have to wear underwear? Not saying it would justify what he did, I'm just trying to figure out some way that what he said wasn't a massive non-sequitur.

     

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  12.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Sep 27th, 2013 @ 10:52pm

    Re:

    Maybe it is the same psychological mechanism of hoarders.

    You feel compelled to do something no matter what the consequences, maybe he had a bet with his friends or had an argument and didn't want to lose it, whatever the reason he lost himself on the subject though, maliciously or naively he did something that a great number of us find objectionable.

    There are people out there that really don't like to lose an argument and will go to extremes to prove they are right and feel compelled to get what they need no matter what the consequences.

    Now I am not saying this is what happened I don't know the guy, I don't know his reasons only what is written here, but there are some theories that although wouldn't excuse his behavior would explain it in a less perv way for lack of a better term, regardless either way he crossed a line that most of us know where it is and would not cross it, for naivety or malice he did something that a great number of us find it wrong.

     

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  13.  
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    nasch (profile), Sep 28th, 2013 @ 3:08pm

    Prison?

    Is what he did actually illegal? I'm sure there's a school rule that could get him fired, but he was doing this in a public place (though surreptitiously), not a hidden camera in a locker room or something. I just can't think of a law that would violate.

     

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  14.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Sep 28th, 2013 @ 7:45pm

    Just think - he could've claimed the undergarments he was looking for were made by Al Qaeda ... and he was an undercover NSA agent ...

     

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  15.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Sep 28th, 2013 @ 8:00pm

    Re: Re: Prison?

    more specifically:
    (c) For the amusement, entertainment, sexual arousal, gratification, or profit of oneself or another, or on behalf of oneself or another, intentionally uses an imaging device to secretly view, broadcast, or record under or through the clothing being worn by another person, without that personís knowledge and consent, for the purpose of viewing the body of, or the undergarments worn by, that person.

     

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  16.  
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    nasch (profile), Sep 28th, 2013 @ 9:10pm

    Re: Re: Re: Prison?

    " under or through the clothing being worn by another person"

    So it sounds like it would depend on exactly what was recorded, which seems appropriate. From the descriptions it does sound like he could be charged under that law. I wonder if a lot of states have such statutes.

     

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  17.  
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    anonymouse, Sep 29th, 2013 @ 8:30am

    Had a case at work where a woman have purposefully flashed her breasts and i got an eyeful of her puffy nipples, that were hard as anything at the time.
    Maybe she did it to see how i would react, she did it more than 3-4 times, and maybe she did it to embarrass me for happening to look at them when she purposefully bent over giving me a good look.
    Whatever the reason i reported it to my manager and suddenly he was hanging around her desk....

    sadly if you are a professor you could have students doing this on purpose so they can accuse you of something or encourage you to give them higher grades.

    Not to say that this is what he was doing, in fact it sounds like he really was a perv, but hey got to give the guy the benefit of the doubt...now where are those pics for all us guys to see if it was as bad as it is being made out to be.

     

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  18.  
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    Anonymous Coward, Sep 29th, 2013 @ 10:36pm

    Re:

    Perhaps the institution that granted him his degree ought to be investigated for granting degrees to idiots?

     

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  19.  
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    Ninja (profile), Sep 30th, 2013 @ 4:14am

    Are you sure that it wasn't Japan? That's where the creepy flourishes ;D

    I should note I'm very fond of stuff from Japan (food, anime etc).

     

    reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]


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