Flying Security: Shackle All Passengers With Tazer-Like Bracelets

from the coffee,-tea-or-bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt dept

And we were just talking about how the expected boom in air travel security technology never materialized, and along comes Bruce Schneier to point out a patent on a bracelet that passengers would be forced to wear, which could provide a debilitating shock at the decision of a crew member. And, yes, there's a company trying to commercialize this idea. I'm sure absolutely nothing might go wrong by strapping up all passengers with a potentially debilitating shock. Nothing at all...

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  1. identicon
    FlyingCommuter, 22 Mar 2008 @ 6:16am

    Level the playing field...

    Apologies in advance -- long rant follows...

    I say put one of those short rubber cudgels (like the German Police use) in every seat-back pocket along side the barf-bag.

    If someone gets sufficiently out of line, *any* passenger(s) are welcome to stomp a new mud-hole in the miscreants behind and walk it dry. The accompanying law will require you and at least 6 witnesses (not involved in the actual clubbing) from the same flight to swear in court that a reasonable and prudent person in the same situation would agree that the a-hole needed the level of beating given. Without the witnesses, you get to spend some time in jail.

    Initially, there will surely be some false-positives among paranoid passengers who are on a hair trigger or mass affrays among several passengers (oh, rival inner-city gang-bangers perhaps?). But in short order folks will get the message that they need to behave themselves on a plane.

    Mentally unstable a-holes who can potentialy lose self-control will be well advised to travel with someone who can control them. Otherwise, they are at the mercy of the other passengers.

    Pacifists who don't want the cudgel can certainly request to have it removed from their seat-back pocket for their flight. However, they need to remember that pacifists only survive in a society that both tolerates them *and* protects them from the rest of the world which may not share their non-violent ways.

    Given my personal observations, TSA can not and will not prevent any determined person from boarding with a blunt object or non-metallic edged weapon. Heck, I commonly see backpacks emerge from the metal detector with two fist-sized aluminum carabiners dangling off the *external* accessory loops without anyone challenging them. But heaven help a grandma/infrequent traveller who packs a full-sized bottle of shampoo in her carry-on because she will get treated like a terrorist...

    The above suggestion to arm everyone on the flight with some (typically) non-lethal type of weapon is (admittedly) radically extreme and doesn't stand any chance of being implemented. However, as a frequent traveller with one or more flights per week, I can confidently state that the trained-monkeys manning the TSA stations in each and every airport I go through are *consistently* worthless. They typically have zero motivation; a complete absence of any sense of an urgent purpose; generally display an "I really hate my job" attitude and are clearly not paying attention. To be fair, there are a scant few TSA employess who seem to display a sense of purpose and appear diligent; however, that can not be said of the vast majority of them by any reasonable and prudent observer.

    I say that, since TSA can not be relied upon to guarantee a safe flight, then we should at least give everyone on board a fighting chance. I'm open to most any suggestion that accomplishes that goal.

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