Federal Election Commission To Crack Down On 'Deez Nuts' As Presidential Candidate
from the you-take-the-fun-out-of-everything dept
In this somewhat insane presidential election, about the only non-terrifying entertainment that came out of it happened last summer when Public Policy Polling (PPP) released a poll showing that “Deez Nuts” would get 9% of the vote.
The more web savvy among you may know that “Deez Nuts” was a popular web meme earlier in 2015, but it didn’t quite explain how it got into the poll. It turned out that a 15 year old kid named Brady Olson had filled out the necessary paperwork under the name Deez Nuts, and PPP had decided to toss it into their poll as a bit of fun. The attention paid to Deez Nuts as a political candidate resulted in a bunch of other silly names filling out the paperwork as well — including Butt Stuff, Mr. Not Sure and Sir TrippyCup aka Young Trippz aka The GOAT aka The Prophet aka Earl.
Of course, after that initial flurry of attention, most people mostly forgot about Deez Nuts, the fake Presidential candidate…. until this week.
You see, earlier this week PPP released a new poll showing that Green Party candidate Jill Stein was trailing Deez Nuts in Texas (also trailing, Harambe, the dead gorilla who is also now something of an internet meme).
And, just like that, it seems the renewed attention may have killed this bit of fun. A day later, the Federal Election Commission (FEC) announced that it will start cracking down on Deez Nuts and other such candidates. It has now started to include a verification procedure for “possibly false or fictitious names.”
Yeah, it seems the FEC can’t take a joke.
The Commission has authorized staff to send verification letters to filers listing fictional characters, obscene language, sexual references, celebrities (where there is no indication that the named celebrity submitted the filing), animals, or similarly implausible entries as the name or contact information of the candidate or committee.
And they’re not kidding around. Part of the process of sending out these letters will remind filers that the FEC may “pursue or refer action for false filing under 52 U.S.C. Section 30109(a) or otherwise report such filings under 52 U.S. C. Section 30107(a)(9).” So, uh, yeah. So, long, Presidential Candidate Deez Nuts. We hardly knew you.
Comments on “Federal Election Commission To Crack Down On 'Deez Nuts' As Presidential Candidate”
Anyone would be better than the choices we currently have.
Re: Re:
at this point, i could not agree more…
a totally RANDOM pick would do better,
a coin flip would do better,
for the simple reason of the game is rigged against us, and ANY improvement would be a substantial improvement…
but, let’s not lose perspective, kampers: it is NOT due to insufficient intelligence that our kongreskritters just can’t ‘see’ the result of their anti-99% laws/actions; it is due to insufficient basic morality to withstand the onslaught of legalized bribery and co-option by the borg…
(forget about whatever small percentage happens as a result of enn ess ehh/see eye ehh/eff bee eye extortion, etc…)
what we got are tools, fools and the occasional boy scout…
but how long does it take a tool or a fool to realize which side their bread is buttered on ? ? ?
what happens to an ‘incorruptible’ (snort) boy scout ?
turn’em if you can, burn’em if you can’t…
maybe keep a few token ones around for window dressing…
its payoffs all the way down, kampers…
“Somewhat insane” is a pretty generous characterization of things.
They can take a joke!
We know they can take a joke. In fact they can take a joke way too far…
…they’re still allowing Trump to run!
The joke candidates are still better for America than the real candidates. So who’s really the joke?
Serious question here. This site is poorly formatted and full screen if I am logged in.
I have been sorta busy and have not logged in for a while.
Did I win a prize or something lol…
Re: Re:
Serious question here. This site is poorly formatted and full screen if I am logged in.
Hmm. That shouldn’t be happening. Check your account preferences? If it is still happening, send us an email with details…
Re: Re:
Sounds like your browser had a connection failure when loading the corresponding style sheet. That tends to result in somewhat bland renderings…
Just reload and see if it gets better.
Re: Re: Re:
That, or he needs to hit ctrl and the scroll on his mouse and resize the page.
Unintended consequences
I hope this doesn’t make it even less likely that we can talk R.U. Sirius into making another presidential run.
Re: Unintended consequences
He’s basically the running mate of BOTH candidates, right now. Pretty sure that’s illegal, so…
Re: Re: Unintended consequences
I meant literally, not “in spirit”. Mr. Sirius ran in 2000, and I keep hoping that he’ll run again.
They’re just jealous that Deez Nuts was so popular and they can’t allow that, it can only be the 2 sociopaths they choose.
What?
Did they really say “We’re cracking down on Deez Nuts”?
In case you can’t see it, nutcracker.
It’s a shame… deeze nutz was clearly the only choice for well informed voters…
Having an entry of “no confidence” would be better, and more sensible. But this is america… we don’t do sensible anymore, apparently. If you’re not a card carrying member of the brainwashed masses you can go fuck yourself. Chose your tawdry corrupt sociopathic sycophant 1%’ers puppet and shut-up already- or be ready to be shamed because you refuse the choice of unprecedented evils.
I love you; But go fuck yourself america. I’m drunk and sick of your shit tonight….
write in
as long as write in candidates are legal “dez nutz” “bugs bunny” etc are always going to end up getting some votes.
Re: write in
Not to mention The Donald. With “bugs bunny” in the race, that amounts to a choice between Disney and Warner.
What about that dog that the police are so afraid of. Any dog able to scare the police half to death enough to destroy a house is one that I would be willing to vote for. That dog doesn’t mess around.
Our tax dollars not at work
One could think that the FEC would have better things to do, like cleaning up the GOP’s racist voter-id laws and voter intimidation policies, than to kick humorists in the nuts! Next to go? None Of The Above!
joke
a thought just struck me, when will someone report both hillary and trump as obvious jokes? at the very least both should be reported and fine etc, as being fakes
Pranksters will just have to be more subtle
…hoping the FEC won’t notice until too late.
For example,
Raymond D. O’Shack
or… Donald Trump.
Re: Pranksters will just have to be more subtle
Hugh Jampton for president!!!!
Brewsters Millions
Time for us to vote for the candidate from Brewster’s Millions….None of the Above
Re: Brewsters Millions
Someone just needs to legally change their name to Nona Teabov prior to registering as a candidate.
And what if someone legally changed their name to something like “The Son of Deez Nuts,” then tried to register as a presidential candidate?
Would the FEC tell them in no uncertain terms to fuck off?
It would be pretty undemocratic telling people they can’t register as a candidate in an election if that’s the case…
Re: Re:
Well, it’s pretty obvious what would happen if you read the article. They would send a verification letter, the person with that actual name would verify it. The end.
re: write-in candidate.
In my state- a least for the one and only time I’ve voted (1st term obama suckered me in), there was NO OPTION to write in anything.
I”m curious how many other states are like that, or if that was an error that’s been corrected now.
-Also, literally 49% of my states voters didn’t count that year thanks to the electoral collage. The vote was only won by 12,000 or so votes, but obama got all the points for the state. This is a huge part of why I never voted before, and probably won’t again; The system is ridiculous, it disenfranchises people, by design. I don’t even begin to understand how the electoral collage is still considered legal within the constitution.
Re: re: write-in candidate.
That would be a “winner take all” state.
The idea behind that is, roughly: If candidates are split even close to evenly between “the two parties”, we (the state as a whole) won’t influence the election at all. But hey, if we throw the whole lump of electoral college votes behind “the winner”, we stand a better chance of influencing the election.
So… any state that has a historical bias towards one candidate or the other, the party in power is obviously not going to be in favor of “weakening their block”, while the underdog (of course) supports it. The party in power being in power, the only practical method of moving from winner-take-all to district representation will be via voter initiative. And even then, you have to wave an election like Bush/Gore under their noses….
Two states (Maine, Nebraska) vote by congressional district, the rest are ‘winner take all’. Both those states did so recently – but both moved away from winner-take-all before the 2000 (Bush/Gore) election.
There is a lot more to it.
We can’t possibly let the system that allows billionaire donors to buy candidates turn into a joke can we? The last thing we want is for our corrupt system to become a matter of ridicule and laughter. Right?
Not sure
Clearly Not Sure is the only viable candidate.
Hilary is corrupt to the core
Trump is a narcissistic asshole
Not Sure is the smartest dude on the planet, he can solve any problem.
I, also, am a great believer in “none of the above.” We haven’t had a vote-able candidate in decades; let’s make the parties offer different choices until one IS viable. Having the office vacant through years of failed elections may teach us if we actually NEED anyone in there making trouble…
Just Wondering
Wonder if the U.S. would tear itself apart politically, if someone put ‘JESUS’ on the election ballot? If so, would it happen as a result of that name showing up, or as a result of the FEC taking him off the ballot? Think about it.
Joke candidates
Are they going to crack down on the two jokes leading the polls?
FEC solving real problems, good work!
We had this candidate here called “Rinoceronte Cacareco” (Trainwreck Rhino in a free, not literal translation) a while back. It was a form of protest. Sure Deez Nuts may be a silly joke but the message behind the candidate getting 9% of the votes can’t be ignored with a simple snap from FEC.
Wait, why am I voting again?
So in short, the FEC said: “No America, we will not let you vote for your jokes over our jokes!” Very authoritarian of them.
How about an open election? As in you have to write in your candidate selection? No multiple-choices-fill-in-the-dot nonsense on the ballot. You have to actually write the name of person you want for president, next to the line marked “President”.
That might actually fix a few things around here.
:(
Oh, man … anybody want to buy a few gross of “Deez Nutz” lawn signs? Cheap.
DEEZ NUTZ
I JUST WANT THE DEEZ NUTZ WIFI TO STOP “PARTIALLY” CONNECTING TO MY PC (AND KNOCKING OUT MY OWN WIFI) SINCE I DO NOT HAVE THE DEEZ NUTZ PASSWORD
I WILL HAVE TO REPORT DEEZ NUTZ TO THE FBI COMPUTER CRIME CENTER.