Hide Techdirt is off for the long weekend! We'll be back with our regular posts tomorrow.

Irish Airport Security Bravely Defends Plane From Toddler's Fart-Gun

from the heroes dept

Here at Techdirt, we’ve had a great deal of fun at the expense of the TSA and the agency’s wonderful brand of security theater masquerading as actual airport security. Yes, the government putting on a kind of clinic in the simultaneous overreach into civil liberties for false security and the kind of wasteful government spending that makes the conservative talkshow hosts of the world dip back into the Oxy has been an ongoing source of entertainment. But the TSA can take the same kind of heart that thousands of purported UFO abductees do: you are not alone.

No, as it turns out, foreign airport security agencies can be just as laughable as we can be. Witness the Irish, for instance, and the way they bravely disarmed a three year old of a toy fart-gun.

Well, I do want a kid wielding one of these delightful toys on an airplane, sirs. The very idea of a three year old tumbling down the aisle spraying a bunch of uptight, too-stiff adults with insufficient senses of humor in the face with banana-farts is exactly the kind of life, liberty and happiness no government ought be denying my right to pursue. What’s far less funny – kind of – was the Irish authorities’ insistence that they confiscated the “weapon” because it violated the rules against replica guns. Replica guns typically refer to realistic representations of actual firearms that don’t work. The fart gun is not a representation of a real gun at all. And it most certainly works as intended.

The spokesperson noted that the toy was “being kept safe at the airport” so the child can get it back when the family returns, so that’s nice.

It’s not nice; it’s exceptionally stupid. The Irish authorities are sitting on a children’s toy that they absolutely know is not a weapon over a ham-fisted attempt to play by bureaucratic rules. I think it’s time these lads went and had a Guinness and let the kid have his toy back.

Filed Under: , , , , ,

Rate this comment as insightful
Rate this comment as funny
You have rated this comment as insightful
You have rated this comment as funny
Flag this comment as abusive/trolling/spam
You have flagged this comment
The first word has already been claimed
The last word has already been claimed
Insightful Lightbulb icon Funny Laughing icon Abusive/trolling/spam Flag icon Insightful badge Lightbulb icon Funny badge Laughing icon Comments icon

Comments on “Irish Airport Security Bravely Defends Plane From Toddler's Fart-Gun”

Subscribe: RSS Leave a comment
Anonymous Coward says:

Well, I do want a kid wielding one of these delightful toys on an airplane, sirs.

I don’t. But the reason has nothing to do with the fact that it’s vaguely gun-shaped. It makes noise and scents, in an environment where people are trapped for several hours. (Perhaps so does the 3 year old, but he’s got a reason to be there, and such things may tend to be cumulative.)

Just put the thing in the luggage – the carry-on is fine, as long as they leave it there – and that should be the end of it.

Ninja (profile) says:

Re: Re:

If it is what I think it is I’ve seen it before and the scent is only perceptible in the first few days of use. And I’d rather have fart sounds around than a kid crying out of boredom. Which is totally understandable in long flights. On a plus side they don’t get entertained by the same thing for long at that age, unless it’s some kids cartoon/movie they watch over and over and over.

PaulT (profile) says:

Re: What took you so long? Last week's story.

If you can’t find anything wrong with the story, just whine that it’s not what you want to read.

Seriously, you’ve been crapping over this site for years and you still haven’t worked out that it’s an opinion blog based on external stories that may be days, even weeks old? Mind you, it has taken you this long to correctly identify the name of the author you’re attacking on each story, so maybe you are just that slow.

bureau13 (profile) says:

Toy Guns and Security

I just flew with my kid, and stupidly packed his entire Nerf arsenal in a bag that I then decided to carry on, with the cunning plan of getting it checked for free due to a full flight. That worked, actually, but not before we were delayed while TSA searched the bag, then sternly informed me that they “search everything that looks like a gun.” I have no problem with that actually, it was my screw-up…but it was funny, and they didn’t confiscate anything.

Anonymous Coward says:

Re: Toy Guns and Security

I have taken arsenals of nerf blasters through TSA security on multiple occasions.

What I’ve learned is that it’s best to put them in a separate bag, and not remove them for screening.

The one time I opted to remove them from the bag and put them in the plastic bins was the one time I had a HELL of a time getting through security. It started with several additional travelers commenting about them, and then the TSA telling me they highly discourage toy guns as carry-on.

This was not the first time, nor the last time I took them through security – but every time I left them in the bag, there was no fuss. There have been a couple occasions where the Xray guy pulled the bag aside to look inside, but this lasted a few seconds and once he was satisfied, the bag continued with no further distraction.

Bergman (profile) says:

Re: Toy Guns and Security

What gets me about this is that the rules only prohibit firearms and replica firearms — not toys that look nothing like firearms.

The toy is not a replica and therefore is not banned…except that it was banned anyway.

For comparison, THIS is a replica firearm:


tqk (profile) says:

Re: Re: Toy Guns and Security

What gets me about this is that the rules only prohibit firearms and replica firearms — not toys that look nothing like firearms.

Yup. It looks like something you’d see a cartoon character brandishing, and some cartoon characters brandished guns that looked far more realistic (until it stuck out a flag that said “Bang!” on it).

I’d fire them for getting this so ridiculously wrong, a six year old kid would fire them for getting it so wrong, but to these true believer security theatre types, their response is perfectly reasonable, because “national security.” Theirs is the same mentality that gets you thrown in jail for even mentioning the word “bomb” in an airport, and irradiates or sexually molests babies and octogenarians.

Our job is to smile, shut up, accept it, and hope we don’t get dumped onto the no-fly list at the whim of some minor functionary. Seig heil.

Add Your Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Have a Techdirt Account? Sign in now. Want one? Register here

Comment Options:

Make this the or (get credits or sign in to see balance) what's this?

What's this?

Techdirt community members with Techdirt Credits can spotlight a comment as either the "First Word" or "Last Word" on a particular comment thread. Credits can be purchased at the Techdirt Insider Shop »

Follow Techdirt

Techdirt Daily Newsletter

Techdirt Deals
Techdirt Insider Discord
The latest chatter on the Techdirt Insider Discord channel...