When Captain Picard Loses Patience With Your Cable Service, You Need To Run A Tighter Ship
from the can't-make-it-so dept
As Time Warner Cable continues to lose subscribers and its CEO and others remain in denial over it, it is perhaps time for those in charge to take deep look at themselves. The reason many people end up cutting the cord is that they are tired of the level of disservice they receive for the massive price they pay. You can do web searches for various cable and satellite companies and you can see story after horror story of people's experiences trying to get television or have their current subscription serviced. This is a serious problem and it never seems to get better.
So it really shouldn't be a surprise to learn even celebrities can't get decent service out of TWC. Many of you probably heard the news about the tweet that Sir Patrick Stewart sent after trying to set up cable in his home.
All I wanted to do was set up a new account with @TWCable_NYC but 36hrs later I've lost the will to live.
That is quite the statement. You can even see some of the sympathetic tweets of some of his followers over at Twitter. TWC, for its part, responded to the New York Post with this statement:
There’s no doubt we have a lot of fans at the company, of the actor and ‘Star Trek’ in general. But the truth is, any customer that reaches out to us . . . we’re going to offer them help the exact same way.
That really isn't all that encouraging. If even Captain Jean-Luc Picard, the man who defeated the Borg, loses the will to live when faced with TWC's customer service, how does it think its everyday customers feel? Could this be part of the reason so many jump ship to either become cord cutters or subscribe to satellite, as was the case with Patrick Stewart?
It is time for TWC and other television services to really reflect on what they are actually doing to attract new customers. As the rising generation becomes a generation of cord-cutters and cord-nevers, they will have a tough time at keeping their place in people's homes if they do not change.
Filed Under: cable, customer service, patrick stewart
Companies: time warner cable
Comments on “When Captain Picard Loses Patience With Your Cable Service, You Need To Run A Tighter Ship”
But the truth is, any customer that reaches out to us . . . we?re going to offer them help the exact same way.”
I was suddenly reminded of the scene in a Dirty Harry movie where Harry’s racist remark is defended by noting he’s an equal-opportunity racist.
I was also reminded of Brando … “Get the butter” … as that’s essentially what TWC is telling it’s customers.
Here in San Diego, half the city hasn’t seen a Padres game all year because Fox Sports and Time Warner can’t work a deal for the broadcasting. Not me, but I feel my neighbors’ pain in the Twitter feeds.
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its often the leader who gets credit, riker was commended for destroying the borg ship by capt maxwell
however picard’s humility convinced q to save the enterprise
picard told data how to disable the first ship
picard knew the soft spot on the attacking cube and came up with the plan that data used to destroy the borg in engineering
Captain Jean-Luc Picard, the man who defeated the Borg
If memory serves, the first time he encountered the Borg Q had to save his ass. The next time, Picard himself was assimilated as Locutus. Using the knowledge gained from Picard/Locutus, the Borg wipe out most of the fleet. It’s Picard’s crew that end up saving the day. I can’t remember what happens in First Contact with the Borg Queen, but I think maybe Data saved the day there. Not sure though. Anyway, I don’t remember Picard defeating the Borg.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oiX3gq3RfvQ
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Why didn’t they just always use real bullets? The phasers only worked for a few seconds, but the bullets seem to always work. Should have gone retro.
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Why didn’t they just always use real bullets? The phasers only worked for a few seconds, but the bullets seem to always work. Should have gone retro.
If memory serves me well (and I am sure it does,) the reason this was effective was because Picard specifically removed the safety protocols on the holodeck, which allowed for the system to create “virtual bullets” which had a real intended effect. I suspect that since phasers were far more powerful (and had a built in non-lethal safety mechanism,) that bullets and guns were long phased out by then (the same way that our soldiers don’t wear swords into battle,) and thus unavailable to Picard (though there are the matter replicators, but I believe those replicators had safety mechanisms to prevent the creation of explosives, which bullets contain.)
Damn plot holes….I cannot believe I am actually trying to rationalize a plot hole.
Oh, and this is the perfect 1000’th post…thanks.
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Or more likely Apple arrived late to space race with it’s minimalist iEscapePod then patented the design and use of bullets and guns (in space!), effectively grounding any infringing ship on Mars and holding back galactic exploration by 100 years.
Later when lazers and photon torpedos were invented, Apples patents were easily invalidated by all the late 20th Century prior art – and humans could once again embark on their adventure to go where no patent office examiner had gone before.
Much, much later the FDAA tracks down the USS Enterprise and issues a cease and desist order on the use of replicators – because they’re stealing jobs of poor, starving chefs by copying our food.
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Theoretically, all Picard had to do was use the holodeck to create several squads of Green Berets/SEALS/whatever, then equip them with automatic weapons, then lure the Borg into the holodeck.
End result, lots of dead Borg.
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bullets work on replicators too. (not the ones your food comes out of, the spider creatures from Stargate SG-1)
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The Borg where adapted to phasers, it was only by modifying the phasers in random ways that they could remain even slightly effective. Bullets where not something they would have ever faced in their fight with the federation so they wouldn’t have thought to set up to defend against them so it would take longer for them to adapt the drones to counter them. How ever once the drones had adapted there would be nothing you can do with bullets that would make them effective again. It was a one trick pony so to speak…
I love being a geek 🙂
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How ever once the drones had adapted there would be nothing you can do with bullets that would make them effective again. It was a one trick pony so to speak…
Well, a two trick pony, since they weren’t killed by actual bullets, but by force-fields that simulated the effect of bullets. So if Picard was able to find actual bullets (or defeat the safety mechanisms on the matter replicators to create them,) then he would be able to use actual bullets and not the holodeck.
I love being a geek 🙂
The fact that Michael Okuda wrote a technical manual for Star Trek, and I read through said manual and know how to operate said matter replicators and holodecks…well, that is just sad. But I agree, love being a geek.
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Now it makes sense why Kathryn “I got lost for 7 years” Janeway was promoted over him.
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Voted as “insightful”.
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Nuh uh, according to noted Ferengi Rush Limbaugh, Jean Luc was the victim of affirmative action in the nanny-state known as the Federation and it’s Socialist militia wing, the Federation. But, what do you expect from a president not even born in the Sol System?
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Bah! Socialist militia wing, Starfleet. Where is my edit button!?
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Where is my edit button!?
Amazon patented it.
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She also had a former Borg in her crew to help out.
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Actually, it was Q’s fault that they ran into the Borg in the first place.
And Picard uses a Tommy Gun on the Borg in First Contact to kill a few of them.
Yeah, that’s right! 1930s gangsta style!
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Don’t you mean 30’s Gangnam Style?
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“The next time, Picard himself was assimilated as Locutus.”
All part of the plan.
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Ha! Sure it was.
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Funny I was thinking the same thing. You’re right, it was Data in First Contact. He sacrificed his Borg-made Human skin to defeat the Borg Queen.
How about we revise to “the man who survived the Borg.” It’s not like that’s any less of an accomplishment. 😉
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Picard’s style has always been one of relying on his trusty crew, so he should get credit anyway.
Also, Picard and The Doctor are currently fighting Borg and Cybermen in the Assimilation comics, so he gets another shot at it.
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Still a good leader, who assembles a good team, and then uses them to full effect. He also has the benefit of much more experience.
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Q only had to save their butt after he threw them into the fire to begin with. If I pushed you into the path of an oncoming car, only to then push you back out of the way, I doubt you would say that I saved you.
You could also argue that if the Borg never learned of the Federation’s existence, due to Q sending the Enterprise, that the Borg and Federation may not have met or at least not as soon as they had. Though following that tangent, the Federation would have also been caught completely unprepared for their eventual arrival. So in an indirect way, Q may have saved the Federation… The Dominion vs the Borg would have been fun to see. Assimilating shape shifters into the Borg could have been interesting. I wonder what The Prophets would have had to say about Borg Bajorans.
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“You could also argue that if the Borg never learned of the Federation’s existence, due to Q sending the Enterprise, that the Borg and Federation may not have met or at least not as soon as they had.”
The Borg had already assimilated several Federation and Romulan outposts (In the episode The Neutral Zone) before Q tossed the Enterprise into Borgspace in Q-Who?
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its often the leader who gets credit, riker was commended for destroying the borg ship by capt maxwell
however picard’s humility convinced q to save the enterprise
picard told data how to disable the first ship
picard knew the soft spot on the attacking cube and came up with the plan that data used to destroy the borg in engineering
Re: He ddin't
The Borg didn’t get defeated until voyager’s last episode.
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I believe the Borg still lives on. In the absence of a Queen, another existing drone is converted to fill her place. That’s how Data/Picard killed her in First Contact, then they killed her again at the end of Voyager, and I believe yet again in the books from what I’ve heard. Though I was also told that the books say that Queen actually escaped destruction by Voyager.
Don’t forget about the current fiasco with time Warner and x ox live. Not exactly TW’s fault, but they aren’t helping either
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did they finally say what was causing that problem with XBL?
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I don’t think so, the newest article I could find on it was the one from Kotaku stating it was in it’s second day of being down. And that xbl people are working on it.
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Based on the MTU errors I was getting while trying to troubleshoot, and the death of UDP packets outside TWC’s network, it was a combination of:
Microsoft tweaking the packet size for XBox Live
TWC’s backbone provider, XO Communications, losing UDP packets over 700 bytes
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I kinda understand what your talking about, my knowledge of networking is shaky at best. So, does that also explain why only some areas under TW’s service where having this problem, but not others? I can guess it has something to do with TW’s poor service in most areas?
I don’t know what would be worse — if he got better service, then the takeaway would be “You have to be the captain of Starfleet’s flagship to get better service.” He didn’t, so it’s “Not even the captain of the Enterprise can get good service.”
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It’s also worth noting that Stewart was having trouble with the local office and gave up without trying to escalate the issue. 2 minutes after he tweeted about “losing the will to live,” TWC’s twitter team tried to help him and he never responded.
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(well, he responded to say “I don’t care anymore,” but that doesn’t really count)
why did I "cut the cord?"
I ended my cable television service (years ago) because more than 99% of what they offered was of no interest to me.
Why did I need dozens of sports channels? I have zero interest in sports.
Why did I need half a dozen worthless news channels (stretching the definition of “news” to include “Fox”)? I get more detailed news from around the world online.
Why did I need so many channels of ancient tv reruns? If I ever had any interest in such shows, I already saw them. If I still have an interest, I’ll just download videos and keep them as mementos.
What do I want? Information. I want answers to my questions. I want valid education. I want items that interest me and/or that broaden my horizons.
Cable television is dreck, and spoonfed dreck at that. To hell with it.
Re: why did I "cut the cord?"
“Why did I need so many channels of ancient tv reruns?”
Most of them available on DVD anyway.
“What do I want? Information.”
By hook or by crook, you will!
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(BTW, I have them all on Laserdisc. 🙂
Shatner (TW) and Simon Pegg (BT) have each had their problems with connectivity
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Shatner had connectivity issues? He was tweeting about a radio station being taken away.
Be honest: when’s the last time you turned on your subscription television service to use the digital music channels to “watch” talk radio? The station in question streams content over the web, and if Shatner’s concerned about them losing carriage fees from TWC, he could also volunteer to do some ads for them or something.
When you have a local monopoly, you don’t need good customer service.
Whathehuh?
SPS- TWC cable customer service sucks
TWC- We’re sorry you feel that way but it is same service we provide everyone
ME – THEN FREAKIN CHANGE IT!
The answer when someone tells you you suck is NOT to reply that you suck ALL THE TIME! Who the hell is the TWC PR dept and why are they still employed?
Re: Whathehuh?
They’re saying they don’t have one phone number for normal people and one phone number for celebrities. If you have a problem with *any* company’s customer service, it’s probably not a good idea to just get mad or give up – there are always options.
TWC, like many other companies, has a social media team that will respond to questions on Twitter or Facebook.
I’ve gotten help with problems that phone-monkeys couldn’t or wouldn’t fix by going to Twitter – in some cases (like Planters, yay peanuts) they got back to me in less time than it took for me to find their twitter handle. TWC’s twitter team responded to Stewart’s tweet two minutes later, but he refused help.
Seriously, how hard is it to understand that the PR team wouldn’t harass the guy just because he’s famous? It might make Trekkers feel better to know their stars are treated like kings, but if the man says “no,” you leave him the hell alone.
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yea but the PR team didn’t say something a long the lines of “We are sorry Sir Patrick Stewart’s problem was not resolved within a reasonable time frame. We take any such complaints with equal weight here and strive to provide the best service possible to all of our customers. Sometimes there are disconnects and our goals and what actually happens do not meet and we do our best by all of our customers to rectify the issue when we become aware of it and strive to fix the disconnect that caused the issue in the first place.”
INSTEAD of that throwaway comment of “eh? sucks for that british knight? Guess what, our bodily functions are sustained on your tears and frustrations and we don’t care where it comes from!”
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“If you have a problem with *any* company’s customer service, it’s probably not a good idea to just get mad or give up – there are always options.
TWC, like many other companies, has a social media team that will respond to questions on Twitter or Facebook.”
The whole point is that customer service should WORK THE FIRST TIME (not cap-ing at you, just in general!! ) Any company that places too much reliance on their customer service department to take care of screw-ups that should never have happend, or to ‘smooth over’ policies and procedures that are in place that just don’t work, is doomed.
Of course they responded after he said something. If he were a common person he’d have had to wait another 2 weeks.
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Have you ever used twitter to contact a company you were having a hard time with on the phone? My wife and I have gotten good responses out of a number of companies there, or on Facebook.
In fact … the only company that never responded to a serious inquiry was Microsoft.
If you’re having a problem with a company and the phone support team isn’t helping, try their social media contact. You don’t have to be famous, you just have to be polite and cooperative.
19.95 for 6 months
Does that still work on humans? I couldn’t care less about your teaser deal, what is the bottom line.
But yeah, Cabllite is a dinosaur. they have no clue who their customers are, & that is obvious throughout the TV world, cable, networks, everyone involved seems clueless. How else do you explain how every intelligent show gets cancelled, and replaced with something like Jersey shore, or how sports get so much air time.
“But the truth is, any customer that reaches out to us . . . we?re going to offer them help the exact same way.”
I SO want to play Mad Libs with that sentence.
The Comcast Maneuver
The obvious name for Picard’s tactic.
You should they treat all customers the same, so you cry like children over his wait, well if they had been right over there in minutes taking care of him, you would cry like little children about how a star gets service while you wait, pathetic
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“You should they treat all customers the same, so you cry like children over his wait, well if they had been right over there in minutes taking care of him, you would cry like little children about how a star gets service while you wait, pathetic”
It’s not really pathetic to complain about shit service. This story just gave form to the current complaint, but the why behind the complaint was around long before this.
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incoherent much bro?
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They should be getting better service for everyone.
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“But the truth is, any customer that reaches out to us . . . we?re going to offer them help the exact same way.”
Translation: we’re going to treat all of our customers alike… with contempt and ridicule.
umm… that was actually shatners tweet, in response to patrick stewarts separate complaint.
they were both having issues, on opposit coasts, i thought i caught this on boing boing yesterday, but can’t find that one….they’ve got both tweets here though: http://www.uproxx.com/webculture/2012/09/the-two-best-star-trek-captains-reunited-via-twitter-to-bitch-about-their-cable-providers/
edit: never mind, you had it attributed right, but BOTH were bitching yesterday (i don’t use twitter,took me a second to figure out where the arrows were pointing). story was a two parter. missing shatners return tweet misses out on half the punchline.
He must have forgotten,...
to say “Make it so.”
There’s no way any being alive could ignore the authority with which he delivers that line…
Re: He must have forgotten,...
Only if he says “Engage” somewhere along the line.
Slime Warner be glad we don’t have Phasers.
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Well, we have killbots. A Shame they’re about as good as TWC’s service.
TWC vs Picard
In other words… Resistance is futile.
I’m disappointed in all of you. I haven’t see any Picard Facepalm picture links! =P
http://img0085.popscreencdn.com/146027716_picard-facepalm-gif-picard-facepalm-animated.jpg
http://funniestlol.com/container/uploads/2012/05/121-picard-facepalm-funny-demotivational.jpg
Found it...
Do you mean this?
http://boingboing.net/2012/09/23/time-warner-cable-pisses-off-t.html
...
I guess this is what you call an…
Enterprise-level problem.
C'mon
“rising generation”??? C’mon! How could you NOT use “next generation”???
Hey, I’m good with their level of service. So good, I left tv totally 11 years ago. I got tired of the whole business of using that as excuses to serve you ads. I HATE ADS. The constant rerun didn’t help either.
I’ve been doing just fine with out a tv and have no desire to get one.
PPV isn’t much good without one. Sorry, I don’t have a cable to cut. Not going to have one either.
It’s worth noting that the first two “sympathetic tweets” aren’t from his twitter followers – they’re from TWC people offering help … which he refuses.
I wish I’d gotten that kind of response from Microsoft when my XBox Live account got hacked, the hacker stole $25 worth of points, and charged >$100 to my credit card, then Microsoft lost my gamerscore and sent credits for the points to the wrong account. Instead I spent *three months* calling and eventually asking for their legal contact info so I could go to small claims court before I finally got to use my points.
Defeated the Borg
Was defeated by TWC
http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3r23pi/
"Make it so"
I think he should have went to Red Alert and fired a spread pattern of Photon Torpedoes and if that didn’t work, kick it into Warp 9 and “Engage”.
That usually solves my problems. 🙂
“It is time for TWC and other television services to really reflect on what they are actually doing to attract new customers.”
Easier said than done. I know, it’s going to look bad defending cable companies, but let’s really focus on the issue here.
To attract new customers means these cable companies need content. Guess who owns the content.
The rising number of “contract disputes” clearly shows what’s going on: more coin is going out than what’s coming in, and these companies are eating the loss in order to facilitate current customers and their bills, while trying to lure in new customers (in a limited market, mind you) to help offset the content’s price tag.
In short: even if TWC gave the best customer service, it all becomes moot because, days later, they’ll wind up in another “contract dispute”.
Make no mistake here: content owners are watching these numbers like a hawk. If there’s growth, it’s the biggest coincidence how “contract disputes” seem to come out of no where and affect that growth.
Content owners, not TWC, are what’s killing cable.
Let’s be cognizant of the true enemy here, rather than trying to scapegoat a company between a rock and a hard place.
When this issue is cleared up, and TWC still acts like this, then we can talk.
Did anybody else read the tweet int heir mind with Picard’s accent?
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Yes.
Why didn’t Stewart just go with one of the other cable providers in his area? I’m sure TWC has plenty competition in that region.
…
Oh, yeah. Nm.
Cable Cutter
Truth is, we cut cable because the bill was getting too high, and with Netflix and the internet… you can find pretty much everything out there that cable provides anyways.
Picard to TWC: “MAKE IT SO!!! DAMN IT!”
yarrrr pirate mike
I like the way the headline implies that Captain Picard is unusually tolerant of poor customer service.
Lifetime annuity
Cable companies treat customers this way because you cable subscribers have told them it’s OK by paying for their service each month. I’m not like Captain Picard: when the cable company is unresponsive to me or charges me too much, I leave. I’m not going to waste my time trying to reason with a company dedicated to overcharging me. There is no value to me here. I’m not going to call the cable company and complain. Why? Because they don’t care. I’m such a non-issue to them; they have no reason to care about my problem. My business is about 0.0000001% of their income, that my complaint does not matter and neither does any one else’s. Clearly. Cable TV is unnecessary and it’s not worth paying money for. It’s certainly not worth wasting hours and days trying to get someone to care about my problem. I used to watch cable and because I’m no longer interested in the programming, I’ve changed my habits and cable is not in my future. These operators know their life is limited. They’re milking it for what they can now. Rates are high because you keep writing checks and allowing auto pay to suck your hard earned cash out. Is paying over $100 each month a good value to you? Really? Look at it this way; at $50/mo you waste $600/year and about $42,000 during your life. If you add up your lost wages, that figure is more like $21,000 a year and $1,528,800 over your life + $42,000! Yes, and that’s only using a very modest $12/hour pay rate. Imagine if you’re paying over $100/mo to the cable company and you can earn substantially more. And this is how the cable company looks at you: you’re worth a lot of money to them over your life. They don’t care if you watch their content, they simply want you to pay them a monthly annuity for the rest of your life. Yes, you’re worth over a hundred thousand dollars to them and they treat you with such disdain. Why do you allow this?
I wised up a couple months ago! I got tired of my $170 Comcast cable Bill. All it was, was Internet, and HD TV service with a Dual Tuner DVR box. No Premium anything. I got rid of a Premium channel years ago because of the rising prices. So I cut the cord2 months ago and haven’t looked back.
I moved into my new House last month, I just got my new huge Antenna setup and I get like 15 Digital HD channels (More if I wanted Spanish and whatnot). I use Media Center on my Windows PC to record and so I have free Channel Program listings and DVR capabilities. I’m using a dual HD tuner that plugs into Ethernet. I get U-verse Internet for under $40 a month. Basically I’m saving a little over $1,500 a year doing this!!! I was already paying for Netflix and Amazon Prime. I’ve giving Hulu+ a try, but I have more content then I know what to do with. Using ‘PlayOn’ software I can stream other channels on the internet like Syfy, and whatnot.
I look around where I live now, not a Antenna in site and I’m thinking SUCKERS!!! I now have my Dad on board, he’s been a long time DISH Subscriber. My brother wants to do the same, it’s only his Wife stopping him right now. She like BRAVO. My Favorite show ‘The Walking Dead’ on AMC I can’t get now, BUT I can get a Season Pass on Amazon and watch each new episode as it comes out. Way worth it, and commercial free!!! Again, SUCKERS!!!
This is also why there are CAPS, trying to stop the Cable cutting. Which is why I have the Antenna. No need to stream CBS,ABC,NBC,CW, PBS, etc in HD, I get a better picture with my Antenna. It’s not as compressed!!! Think about it. I could go on and on about my setup and hardware, but it pays off in no time flat.
When you go from a $170 Cable bill to under $40,.. just think about that!!! My Dad was paying $40 just for home phone service that hardly gets used. He’s just had that number for so long, I’m getting him switched over now where it’ll be FREE for him and he gets to keep the same phone number he’s had for 20+ years.
AJ FTL
“It’s Picard’s crew that end up saving the day.”
No, it was Picard – “Sleep”
AJ, you are, and will always be, a dumbass.