You Have An Obituary From Your Friend; Accept/Deny Funeral Arrangements?

from the that-growing-death-business dept

Social networking sites are definitely hot, but with Congress increasingly looking to block kids from using such sites, it’s no surprise that some entrepreneurs are targeting a slightly older demographic. There’s been a lot of talk about how it’s about time companies started offering products and services for the retiring baby boomers, and Monster.com founder Jeff Taylor is apparently taking up the challenge. To be honest, his site doesn’t sound all that different from plenty of other sites targeted at “silver surfers,” but this one tries to look a bit more caught up with the social networking times. Still, though, for a group of folks who probably would not want to be reminded of their own mortality, is it really worth it to focus on handy obituary alerts every time someone you know dies? Also, Jeff Taylor (who, at 45, is outside the target market of the site) probably doesn’t help things by stating: “The death business is growing.” Now there’s a marketing slogan: “You’re going to die soon. Let us help inform all your friends.”


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Comments on “You Have An Obituary From Your Friend; Accept/Deny Funeral Arrangements?”

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14 Comments
Jeff says:

I'm not dead yet! I feel fine!

DEAR E-DED SUBSCRIBERS:

We regret to inform you that due to a server error, approximately six hundred thousand preliminary obituaries were erroenously sent out yesterday afternoon.

If you received a notice of the death of your loved one between 6pm and 11pm PST yesterday, it is possible your loved one is not truly dead yet. Please contact your loved ones separately though your usual contact channels to determine their true and current vital status.

It is the policy of our company to provide a loving final message from the departed to their friends, and in doing so enhancing the lives of those they leave behind by enhancing the deaths of the dear departed. Obviously the false emails delivered yesterday run contrary to our company’s core values.

As a result, we are now offering our service free for one year for anyone who received such a false email. That’s right, if you die within the next year, your message to your loved ones will be delivered at absolutely no cost to you. Also, for a limited time, you will receive our Premium Service at a discount. That’s right, place your order for one year of FREE notification service, and for only $50, you can upgrade to our Premium Service. As a Premium user, your loved ones will not only receive your final words to them, but when your soul reaches its final destination, your loved ones will also receive an SMS message! Standard SMS messages include “Rejoice! is at Peace in Heaven!” and “We’re very sorry, but went to The Bad Place.” Or create your own Custom Final Destination Message for only $10 more per recipient!

And, if your loved one DID actually die yesterday, we’re very sorry to hear about your loss, but are taking this opportunity to inform you that your loved one’s death was in no way caused by our server outage.

Thank you and have a nice day.

Jeff says:

Re: I'm not dead yet! I feel fine!

DEAR E-DED SUBSCRIBERS

Due to a server error, the Standard SMS message format was incorrectly stated in our previous posting.

Correct Standard SMS messages include

Rejoice! YOUR NAME HERE is at Peace in Heaven!

and

We’re very sorry, but YOUR NAME HERE went to The Bad Place.

To clarify, YOUR NAME HERE is the name of the Premium User who would be the deceased, not the recipient of the message.

Also, it has been brought to our attention that some consumers have questioned our business tactics. While we are not a member of the Better Business Bureau, we would like to point out that we have been proudly serving Internet users who have died over the past 12 years, and we have never had a single complaint from any of them.

Thank you and have a nice day.

Troy says:

An ear to hear...

I’ve got a heap of ideas around web and sms based commercial product information systems with no ear to hear them. This is a good idea and slightly before its time but should naturally grow and the boomers continue to grow old. I’m an innovator, not an entrepreneur – but just starting to get off my bum and look for an ear to hear my ideas and see if there are any of the latter searching for some fresh ideas to partner up to.

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