Techdirt. Stories filed under "water"

DJs' 'Dihydrogen Monoxide' April Fool's Prank Results In Suspension And Possible Felony Charges

Tim Cushing — Wed, 3 Apr 2013 11:12:36 PDT

April Fool's Day. Either you love it or you hate it. There's not much middle ground. As a writer on The Internet, April Fool's Day is a 24-hour deathtrap composed of plausible stories that will set you on fire the moment you press the Publish button. It turns even the most cheerful of writers into a deeply cynical curmudgeon, one who approaches each possible scoop with more suspicion than the heavily-bearded guy down the street who's building a bunker under his garage and frequently answers the door wearing nothing but a shotgun. (Much of this reverts back to normal following the "holiday," but each year adds another layer of resentful suspicion. In fact, if you cut open a writer, you can simply count the rings to determine how many years they've been in the business.)

For many people, though, April Fool's Day is a 24-hour period filled with lighthearted pranks and sub-Onion quasi-satire. They love cheerful shenanigans and they love being fooled. Except when they don't. Then it's suddenly "gone too far" and concerned foolees start pressing for "something to be done about it." This is one of those stories, the kind where you can't fool all of the people all of the time, but you can temporarily fool enough of them that someone gets seriously pissed off.

Florida country radio morning-show hosts Val St. John and Scott Fish are currently serving indefinite suspensions and possibly worse over a successful April Fools' Day prank. They told their listeners that "dihydrogen monoxide" was coming out of the taps throughout the Fort Myers area.

If you're not familiar with the term "dihydrogen monoxide," you'll be thrilled to know that the compound is damn near everywhere. Not only that, but its ubiquity has prompted many a petition to be signed fervently in favor of banning the dangerous-sounding substance completely. No one's really sure what makes it so dangerous, but anything containing two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen can't be completely safe.

Of course, anyone who's paid attention over the last couple of decades (at least) knows that dihydrogen monoxide is water. What's surprising is that a couple of pranking DJs could find enough people unaware of this fact to a.) pull off the prank and b.) possibly face felony charges. Wait... what?

[A]pparently, the station, the water works, and perhaps the authorities are still trying to figure out if the two hosts could face felony charges for, again, reporting that the scientific name of water was coming out of the pipes. "My understanding is it is a felony to call in a false water quality issue," Diane Holm, a public information officer for Lee County, told WTSP, while Renda stood firm about his deejays: "They will have to deal with the circumstances."

It seems unlikely the DJ duo will actually face felony charges, but they are currently suspended after being yanked off the air in the middle of their morning show. Apparently, enough people expressed their concern about dihydrogen monoxide leakage that the local water utility was forced to issue a statement.

These reactions to an April Fool's prank that occurred on a day when pranks are to be expected seem rather overblown. The DJs are suspended indefinitely for technically telling the truth and the station has indicated the pair are facing additional punishment. Sure, nobody wants to feel like a fool, but that is the totality of April 1st. If this many people can't take being taken for a ride on the foolingest day of the year, then it's a clear sign that the national sense of humor is in critical condition. (We've already eulogized the national sense of proportion and scattered its ashes across a variety of moral panics and Terms of Service outrages.) To put it in more familiar terms, "If you can't laugh at yourself, the terrorists win."

[It appears the terrorists have won. (Again.) A poll on the radio station's website (warning: ads frickin' everywhere even with Adblock) shows that 78% of the respondents believe the DJs should return to the airwaves "never." (Poll is no longer live, but an "indefinite" suspension could technically lead to returning "never.")]

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Dailydirt: Fresh Drinking Water

Michael Ho — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 17:00:00 PST

Potable water is an extremely valuable resource, even though most people take it for granted. Not too many people are concerned about "peak water" yet, but there are some folks looking into the feasibility of towing icebergs to places where clean water is scarce. There are numerous ways to get clean water, but most of them are fairly energy intensive (and thereby expensive). Here are just a few notable projects for purifying water.

Saudi Arabia is planning to build the world's biggest desalination plant, capable of processing 158 million gallons of water in a day, by 2018. Exporting fresh water could be Saudi Arabia's next valuable product. [url]
Dean Kamen (the inventor of the Segway) has been working on a device called a Slingshot that purifies water and generates electricity. Over a billion people don't have access to clean water or electricity, so that's a lot of people who might benefit if this device works out economically. [url]
A desalination battery uses electricity to separate sodium chloride from sea water. This technology isn't quite ready to generate tons of cheap, potable water yet, but it's a nice first step towards more cost effective ways of making sea water more useful. [url]

If you'd like to read more awesome and interesting stuff, check out this unrelated (but not entirely random!) Techdirt post.

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DailyDirt: Exploring Our Solar System

Michael Ho — Tue, 20 Nov 2012 17:00:00 PST

Our solar system is a pretty big place, and we haven't really seen that much of it. But as we send out more and more probes and get fancier telescopes, we're learning about a ton of interesting phenomena that occur beyond our own planet. Here are just a few fascinating factoids and links on how we're exploring space without sending astronauts anywhere (yet).

While the Earth and other rocky objects in our solar systems aren't perfectly round, our Sun is remarkably spherical... almost too spherical. The Sun isn't perfectly spherical, but it's actually one of the roundest objects humans have ever measured, and it's a bit puzzling why it should be so round. [url]
NASA's Cassini spacecraft has discovered that Saturn's moon Titan could hold bodies of liquid water under its crust. This could mean there's yet another place in our solar system with water that could possibly sustain life. [url]
A geochronometer is an instrument that could help determine how old various things in our solar system are. Portable geochronometers could be sent to other planets (like Mars) to improve our estimates of how long it takes for certain planetary features to develop. [url]

If you'd like to read more awesome and interesting stuff, check out this unrelated (but not entirely random!) Techdirt post.

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DailyDirt: The Beauty Of Frozen Water

Michael Ho — Mon, 8 Oct 2012 17:00:00 PDT

Water is an amazing substance. It's sometimes called the universal solvent. It's a requirement for all known forms of life. It's one of the rare chemical compounds that is less dense when it's frozen at ambient conditions. Water is cool, and ice is even cooler. So here are just a few links related to visually stunning ice formations.

Ice flowers are a delicate formation of ice crystals made under windless conditions when supersaturated water vapor above sea ice condenses into dendritic ice crystals. Ice flowers are a natural phenomenon -- typically seen early in the morning. [url]
An art project called 'Pi in the Sky' printed the first thousand digits of pi using 5 'skytyping' planes at about 10,000 feet in the air -- probably not quite high enough to form a cloud of ice crystals, but it was still cool looking. Cirrus clouds which are mostly ice crystals form at slightly higher altitudes (around 18,000 feet or higher), but skywriting-skytyping planes actually spray paraffin oil to form their messages. [url]
The "icicle of death" (also known as a "brinicle") is made of freezing water that occurs as cold, dense salt water sinks through less salty sea water. The frozen brine can kill sea urchins and starfish when it touches them on the sea floor. [url]

If you'd like to read more awesome and interesting stuff, check out this unrelated (but not entirely random!) Techdirt post.

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DailyDirt: Unobtainium Will Save Us!

Michael Ho — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 17:00:00 PDT

Some folks are worried about Peak Oil. Others are worried about "Peak Helium" when most of the Earth's resources of the lightweight element have vanished into space. There are also all kinds of metals that are getting harder and harder to find. Where will we be able to replenish precious, finite materials? Duh, just go get some from other celestial bodies. You only need to be a billionaire with a few other billionaire friends to start this project. Estimated time for completion: 10 years in the future.

Planetary Resources has been getting some buzz for its plans to mine nearby asteroids for precious metals and water. If gold was as abundant as aluminum, what would we do with it? [url]
Is it time to start studying up on space law now? Ownership of asteroids and the legalities of mining them could be a lucrative field someday! [url]
NASA and Astrobotic Technology are going to look for ice deposits and possible sources of useful materials on the moon. Silly, NASA, everyone knows the moon is made of cheese... [url]
To discover more links on space exploration, check out what's floating around in StumbleUpon universe. [url]

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DailyDirt: Fresh Water On Demand

Michael Ho — Fri, 9 Mar 2012 17:00:00 PST

The Earth is literally covered in water, but 97% of that water is in salty oceans and not useful for drinking. In fact, only about 1% of the world's water is really usable by humans (because a lot of fresh water is frozen in glaciers or otherwise inconveniently located). Here are just a few links on the lengths people could go to in order to get drinkable water.

The United Nations held a design competition to create ads that help raise awareness of water conservation efforts. The winners will be picked in June. [url]
A team of software engineers created a simulation that concludes it's possible to tow an iceberg from the waters around Newfoundland to the Canary Islands off the coast of Africa. The expense of actually doing this, however, has not been shown to be worthwhile by anyone yet. [url]
IBM's Almaden Research Center is developing new water filtration membranes for purification processes -- which could be useful for desalination and other water reclamation. The trick is getting water purified without using a lot of energy to do so.... [url]
A guy from Chile was arrested for stealing a 5-ton piece of a glacier -- that he was going to sell on the black market for making designer ice cubes. Glacier ice just tastes way better than the ice that comes out of a plastic tray because it's been aged for millions of years. [url]
To discover more food-related links, check out what's floating around in StumbleUpon. [url]

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DailyDirt: Water On The Earth And Beyond...

Michael Ho — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 17:00:00 PST

The Earth is obviously covered in a lot of water, but a lot more water could potentially exist below the Earth's surface. It's actually somewhat difficult to know exactly how much water exists on our own planet, so it's even harder to figure out how much water exists on other planets or moons. We also don't really know where all the Earth's water originally came from -- icy comets, asteroids or some chemical process that could only occur while the Earth itself was forming. But in any case, water is a fascinating substance to look for, and here are just a few articles on this unique liquid.

Jupiter's moon, Europa, could have a vast saltwater ocean below its surface -- possibly containing more liquid water than all of the Earth's oceans. Images showing the bumpy surface of Europa suggest that there are "chaos terrains" similar to those on Earth, which could help us understand the geology of Europa better. [url]
The "Goldilocks Zone" for extrasolar planets refers to the orbital space where the conditions are just right for liquid water to exist. But that doesn't mean water actually does exist on the other worlds we've discovered so far. [url]
Russian scientists are drilling down through over 2 miles of ice to Antarctica’s biggest subglacial lake, Vostok. There could be exotic lifeforms in these waters which haven't seen daylight for millions of years. [url]
Based on radar measurements, the sediment coverage on the surface of Mars suggests the red planet once had two oceans. These oceans may not have existed long enough to support life formation, and it's not known where all the water went. [url]
To discover more links on space exploration, check out what's floating around in StumbleUpon universe. [url]

By the way, StumbleUpon can also recommend some good Techdirt articles, too.

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DailyDirt: Endless Rain Into A Paper Cup....

Michael Ho — Fri, 9 Dec 2011 17:00:00 PST

It's interesting how packaging can affect the way we consume products and perceive how they taste. Just adding some coloring to foods can make them seem to taste completely different. But changing the color of the packaging might have a similar effect? Here are some interesting packaging changes for some common beverages.

Boxed wine has gained some acceptance with wine drinkers, but will a slightly smaller version of boxed wine sell well? Taking it to the next logical step, there should be "juice box" size wine boxes coming out, too. Who wants to sip wine through a tiny straw? [url]
Some folks seem to hate plastic water bottles, so now there's a paper milk carton without milk, filled with water. Looks like ultra-skim milk -- 0% milk. [url]
Drinking water from a paper cup is okay.. but a paper bottle? Paper water bottles haven't exactly taken over since they were introduced, so... [url]
Coca-Cola has stopped making its 'White Christmas Cans' after a month of selling them because consumers don't like the new look of the can -- and some people think it tastes different. The white cans also look a bit too much like Diet Coke, so some drinkers are getting a few more calories than they expected. [url]
To discover more food-related links, check out what's floating around in StumbleUpon. [url]

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DailyDirt: Don't Drink The Water?!

Michael Ho — Fri, 9 Sep 2011 17:00:00 PDT

Drinking eight glasses of water every day might be overkill, but it's good to stay hydrated. Even though it's almost the end of summer (for folks in the northern hemisphere at least), here are a few quick links on quenching your thirst.

Milk could be better than water or sports drinks for re-hydrating active kids. Got Milk? [url]
Forget Camelbaks if you live in Seattle. Just wear a raincatch -- a raincoat that collects and purifies water for its wearer. It ain't pretty (and it's probably really heavy), but it'll keep you hydrated if you're really paranoid about potable water... [url]
Swimming in fresh warm water sounds like fun -- until you get an amoeba in your nose. You're more likely to be struck by lightning than inhale an amoeba, though. [url]
To discover more food&drink-related links, check out what's floating around in StumbleUpon. [url]

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DailyDirt: Don't Drink The Water

Michael Ho — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 17:00:00 PDT

Water is abundant in most places, and it's generally free -- except for folks who only drink bottled water. So people tend to take water for granted, but there are plenty of reasons to conserve water. Here are just a few reminders.

About 60% of people (surveyed by the WateReuse Research Foundation) don't want to drink water that has ever had direct contact with sewage. The other 40% are wastewater engineers. [url]
Manufacturing plants are apparently releasing lots of pharmaceuticals into wastewater streams. And wastewater processing facilities aren't catching the drugs before releasing them into rivers... [url]
Oklahoma is responding to its ongoing drought after seeing more than its fair share of triple digit temperatures. Unfortunately, some predictions say this "exceptional drought" could last a bit longer, maybe until autumn. [url]
To discover more related links on stuff we eat or drink, check out what's brewing on StumbleUpon. [url]

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DailyDirt: Safe Drinking Water

Michael Ho — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 17:00:00 PDT

The world is covered in water, but not all of it is actually safe to drink. Usually, the problem is that it's too energy intensive (and thereby costly) to purify it. It's a long-standing problem, but there's been some progress. Here are just few quick links on potable water supplies.

Banana peels have actually been proven to effectively filter out various harmful metals from water. They don't kill bacteria, though, and stuffing them into Brita bottles probably won't work, either. [url]
Desalination should be a "last resort" for water purification, but it's been getting more widely used despite its costs. Desalination technology is improving, but it still uses a lot of energy. [url]
Perhaps the real last resort, though, should be towing an iceberg to where you need fresh water. A 30 million ton iceberg could provide enough drinking water for about about 500,000 people -- for a year. [url]
A bunch of companies are promoting water conservation with the slogan: "Wasting Water is Weird." Will quirky viral videos help people to conserve water? [url]
To discover more related links on stuff we eat or drink, check out what's brewing on StumbleUpon. [url]

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DailyDirt: Water, Water, Everywhere...

Michael Ho — Fri, 15 Jul 2011 17:00:00 PDT

Safe drinking water is often taken for granted, but having it is obviously fundamentally important for any community to survive and thrive. There are a lot of different ways to purify water, but the trick is to do it cheaply with available materials. Here are a few interesting links on good old H₂O.

Specially-treated sand can (cheaply!) purify water for drinking. Can't wait for DIY versions to replace Brita filters... [url]
Leaving water in PET plastic bottles to soak up some UV sun rays can kill harmful organisms in a few hours. This is how at least 5 million people disinfect their drinking water in 30 different countries.... [url]
Apparently, bottled water sold in the US could use some more transparent labeling. And US tap water needs a better marketing team. [url]
NASA is working on a way to let astronauts drink their own pee safely. Yum, urine simulants! [url]
To discover more food-related links, check out what's floating around at StumbleUpon. [url]

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Bagel Company Sued For Claiming It Had Patented Process For Making 'Brooklyn Water'

Mike Masnick — Tue, 21 Sep 2010 11:33:00 PDT

Way back in high school, my after school/weekend job was working in a bagel shop in New York. I learned pretty much all aspects of the bagel business, and ever since then I take bagels pretty seriously -- including the well known fact that you just can't make good New York bagels outside of New York. Often, it's because bagel shops elsewhere take shortcuts in how they cook their bagels, but the key reason is, of course, the water. Making a bagel (properly) involves boiling the dough before cooking the bagel, and for whatever reason, only the water in New York seems to have that perfect quality that makes a bagel into a bagel. Since moving away to California, I've never been able to find anything that comes even close to a New York bagel, and instead have to settle for vastly inferior "rolls with holes," that people around here think are bagels.

So, this next lawsuit caught my attention not just because of the patent issues (the stuff that normally catches my attention), but also because it's about bagels and bagel water. Apparently, there's a company (based in Florida, not Brooklyn), called the Original Brooklyn Water Bagel Co., which claims to not just make New York-style bagels, but also to make its own "Brooklyn water," which is necessary for making such bagels, via a "14-step patented process." However, another Florida-based eatery, Mamma Mia's Trattoria is suing OBWB for false patent marking, saying the 14-step patented process is neither 14 steps nor patented: If you don't recall, we've had a few long and detailed posts about the issue of patent marking, which has gained a lot more interest lately, due to some recent rulings that have greatly expanded the potential damages for falsely claiming something is patented when it is not, while also making it easier for anyone (and we do mean anyone) to sue for false patent marking. In fact, because of this, a whole bunch of new patent marking lawsuits have been filed, leading many to feel the law is being abused. However, this story, if the details in the complaint are accurate, seems like exactly the sort of situation that a false marking law was designed to handle.

Mamma Mia points out how often OBWB points to its "patented process" in its marketing and advertising campaigns, suggesting some sort of proprietary and exclusive advantage. However, Mamma Mia notes, it does not appear that OBWB actually holds any patents whatsoever. Oops. OBWB's claim for its "patented process," apparently comes from the fact that it licensed a bunch of patents from another company -- Aquathin (also from Florida), which makes water filtration systems. When Mamma Mia demanded to know what patents were being used, OBWB listed out seven patents from Aquathin.

The only problem? Four of the seven patents are already expired. Of the remaining patents, two are actually design, not utility, patents (which is more like a trademark, and not what people think of when talking about a patent, as it's about the design of a product not any "process"). That leaves a single utility patent (which is close to expiring), but if you look at that actual patent (5,147,533), it's about how to mount a water purification system under a kitchen sink -- which has nothing to do with the process of purifying the water itself.

So, there doesn't appear to be any actual 14-step-patented process here. There may be a 14-step process, and who knows if it actually creates anything close to Brooklyn water, but the patent claim appears to be highly questionable, at best. Even so, Mamma Mia's complaint notes, OBWB still threatened to sue Mamma Mia for infringing on its (apparently non-existent) "patented process," in offering its own "New York-style" pizza.

If the allegations are true, this does seem like exactly what patent marking lawsuits were designed for: to prevent a company from falsely claiming a monopoly on something it has no right to. Of course, this means that if it's actually possible to create a process to replicate New York water (that doesn't involve, you know, bottling water from New York and shipping it around), and that process is not patented, then perhaps there's still hope that we'll be able to get "real" bagels in California...

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