FBI Investigates Journalist For An Obvious Joke Tweet, Because What The Hell Is Wrong With The FBI?

from the and-they-want-access-to-our-secrets? dept

Here’s today’s insane story of FBI ridiculousness: the FBI has been investigating an editor at Huffington Post, Nick Baumann, for an obvious joke tweet mocking fake news. Really. To understand what happened, it requires a bit of background, especially if you’re not steeped in Twitter culture — but it’s the kind of background that (1) you can pick up quickly and (2) shouldn’t confuse an FBI agent… but apparently it did. Still, it requires knowledge of two separate jokes, then a third attempt at a joke… and general knowledge that the FBI doesn’t seem to get jokes. Especially Twitter jokes.

First, you have to understand that there’s a thing called Weird Twitter, which is… basically what it sounds like. It’s more or less a group of Twitter users who post a variety of absurd or silly things, often (though not always) from accounts not naming the actual user. There’s a sort of silly, but dry, sense of humor in these tweets, and unless you follow it closely, you might not always get the humor of it. Even if you are aware of it, you might not get the humor of it. But it’s generally people coming up with silly tweets, some of which kick off more viral memes. Back in October, Weird Twitter person “raandy” or “@randygdub” kicked off quite a storm by tweeting a joke tweet pretending to work at a Post Office in Ohio, and claiming that he was ripping up absentee ballots of people voting for Trump.

Of course, this was back in the day when Trump and his surrogates were insisting that the election was being rigged against him and that there was going to be voter fraud. So, after it made the rounds of Weird Twitter, it left those cozy, joking confines and some Trump supporters picked up on it, believing the tweet was real. Eventually it got onto sites like Gateway Pundit and Drudge Report. Rush Limbaugh mentioned it. It was pretty clearly a joke to people who get Weird Twitter, but once foolish people started taking it seriously, suddenly Ohio’s Secretary of State said he was investigating things, and the Postal Service was forced to make a statement:

Once people started mocking those who fell for it, lots of people on Twitter started making similar joking tweets, using the phrasing “I love working at [x] in [y] and [doing terrible thing z]”

So, that’s joke number one. The second joke involved people passing around totally ridiculous and obviously faked Wikileaks releases claiming extremely silly things related to the conspiracy theories around Hillary Clinton. Perhaps the most well known one — which also fooled some Trump supporters who retweeted it, was a hilariously obvious fake “Clinton Foundation accounts payable invoice” listing all sorts of groups that conspiracy theorists wanted to tie to the Clinton campaign:

Another one was the following one pretending to be from someone associated with Smartmatic voting machines telling Clinton campaign team members that things were all set to program voting machines with some special code with the help of George Soros.

This one is playing on another anti-Clinton conspiracy theory (which some people in our comments insisted was true, though it’s not), that billionaire George Soros owned a company that was making voting machines that were used in the Presidential election (Soros was a big Clinton backer). The story isn’t true. Soros doesn’t own the company, and the machines in question weren’t used in the election anyway, but… details.

Anyway, that’s joke number two.

That finally gets us around to joke number three, which, amazingly, got the FBI’s attention. Baumann saw an acquaintance tweet that fake “voting machine” leak (rightly noting that it was fake) and Bauman creatively decided to effectively mix the two jokes into a third joke. A mashup joke, if you will:

Get it? Got it. Baumann even explained the joke a little while later in a reply tweet, linking to one of the stories about the silly @RandyGDub tweet after some (notice a trend?) people started believing the joke was real and claiming it was evidence of voting machine tampering.

But apparently, the FBI didn’t get the joke. At all. I’ll let Baumann explain the next part:

One Twitter user warned that she had reported me to the FBI and to Project Veritas ? a right-wing organization led by James O?Keefe that stages elaborate stings of reporters, liberals and others; heavily edits its gotcha videos; and then tries to get those people fired.

Project Veritas did not contact me.

But the FBI decided a journalist?s joke was worth its time.

On Nov. 4, I received a call from someone who said he was an FBI agent and wanted to speak to me. I figured it was a prank. I get a lot of hate emails and angry voicemails, and I dismissed the insane possibility that the FBI would investigate an obvious joke on Twitter. I would?ve called back anyway, just to be sure. But it was right before the election, and I forgot about it.

Then, on Monday, a month later, I received a followup message. It was the same person. It turns out he really is a special agent in the Washington Field Office of the FBI.

?Sorry to bother you,? he said. ?The reason I?m calling is ? I can?t give you too many details over the phone ? we recently received some complaints regarding some online postings that were made. I don?t know if you know what that?s in reference to, but would you be willing to sit down with us for a couple minutes tomorrow morning by chance??

I couldn?t believe it and started to say so. But he continued, ?I know this may sound ridiculous, but when we receive complaints we have to follow them up no matter what.?

As Baumann notes, this isn’t actually true. The FBI has every right to ignore totally ridiculous and obviously bogus reports. And, it should. Otherwise it would be way too busy chasing down conspiracy theories. The FBI agent asked to have Baumann come and talk to him, but Baumann rightly notes that when the FBI wants to talk to you, you should shut up and get a lawyer. Baumann went to his employers and got company lawyers involved (given that HuffPo is owned by AOL which is owned by Verizon, you can imagine these are pretty good lawyers).

Baumann notes some further problematic aspects to this investigation — including that the FBI and DOJ have pretty strict rules about contacting a journalist as part of an investigation (that whole Freedom of the Press thing that the FBI has had some problems with in the past…), and it’s pretty clear those rules weren’t followed. And, yes, Baumann identifies himself as a journalist in his Twitter bio. And the investigation is not officially over yet, though one hopes the publication of this article gets it closed pretty quickly:

The investigation is ongoing. I hope it goes no further. As Matthew Miller, a former Justice Department spokesman, said, ?When you have to guess whether it?s incompetence or something nefarious, it?s usually best to guess incompetence.? But getting a call from an FBI agent investigating you is a big deal.

And, of course, the article ends with this lovely kicker:

On Tuesday, I called @randygdub and asked him whether he had heard from the FBI about his original joke. He laughed and said he hadn?t.

Baumann also notes that he sometimes reports on the FBI, but doesn’t think that this is anything nefarious in response to his reporting — and that’s probably true. But it also shows how somewhat random and arbitrary such investigations are — and what a total waste of time and resources they can be. Is this really the best use of the FBI’s time? And if they really “had” to investigate it, that investigation should have started and ended with someone doing at least a tiny bit of online researcher about the jokes in question. It’s not that difficult. One would hope that the FBI employs agents who can do a fairly basic Google search before having to call for a meeting over a tweet…

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Comments on “FBI Investigates Journalist For An Obvious Joke Tweet, Because What The Hell Is Wrong With The FBI?”

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43 Comments
Anomalous Cowherd says:

Follow up every complaint?

I couldn’t believe it and started to say so. But he continued, “I know this may sound ridiculous, but when we receive complaints we have to follow them up no matter what.”

Riiiight. Just like they followed up the warnings from FBI field offices about people training to fly jetliners – but not take offs and landing – in the months leading up to September 11, 2001. I so totally believe them.

OldMugwump (profile) says:

Re: Follow up every complaint?

There is no requirement that FBI agents tell the truth.

But if a citizen lies to any federal agent – about anything (the weather, or that you’re feeling "fine", or why you’re late to work this morning), that’s a federal crime.

Like the one Martha Stewart went to jail for.

Make no mistake about who is the ruled and who are the rulers.

Anonymous Coward says:

Re: Re: Follow up every complaint?

Lie to the FBI/cops? You dare not make an accidental misstatement. You better not even be misunderstood, and god help you, if the agent’s recollection of your statements differs from his own.

Rehearse the statement, “On advice of counsel, I do not answer questions, and I do not consent to searches.” Say nothing but this until your attorney is present, and your remarks are being recorded by device that are and will remain under your or your attorney’s control.

k says:

Re: Re: Re: Follow up every complaint?

Martha Stewart was interviewed as part of an investigation for insider trading. She had received information from her broker that company insiders and friends were selling large chunks of their holdings, so she sold her IMgen stock right before it took a sharp plunge. The insiders and their friends were violating insider trading laws. Stewart, who acted on information from an outsider – her broker, did not violate insider trading laws, but she tried to avoid naming her broker because, while he didn’t break the law, disclosing one customer’s trades to another is very bad for business.

The scope and obviousness of the insider trading around the IMgen plunge was so large the DOJ was forced to actually do something and Stewart wasn’t as well-connected as the actual inside traders, so she took the fall. They couldn’t convict her of insider trading, so they got her on lying to a cop.

The actual case and the problems with penalizing unsworn statements with penalties equal to or greater than for perjury are discussed in detail in the excellent book Three Felonies a Day by William Silvergate.

John Mayor says:

HOW TWEET IT IS

This brings to mind a whole host of funny scenarios!
.
Like going to an art exhibit, and watching some guy spend hours talking to the host about what the pictures really mean! And then being told to sh*t the f*ck up, and get out!
.
Or going to a comedy revue, and finding that you’re the only one in the room who not only gets the jokes, but is the only one who is laughing!
.
Or going to a dance club, and seeing some absolutely gorgeous model take a pass on all the “studs” sitting at the bar, and begin to engage a shy wallflower who is actually a foot shorter than she is!
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You know… some people will always get things!… will always be in the loop!… and will always be on top of the latest news! And others… will forever be in the dark!… will forever “miss the boat”!… and will forever be a pain to those who understand what’s going on!
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Please!… no emails!

JOHN MAYOR says:

Re: Re: HOW TWEET IT IS

C-U-R-S-E YOUR COMMENTS!… W-O-R-M!!… AND, THE F-O-O-L S-P-I-R-I-T AND G-O-D THAT SENT THEM! I NEED YOUR VIEWS ON GRAMMAR LIKE I NEED A BOIL IN THE CRACK OF MY *SS! DO ME A FAVOR… DO US A FAVOR!… CLOSE YOUR LAPTOP, AND WACK IT OVER YOUR HEAD!! THAT SHOULD LOOSEN THE COBWEBS POSSESSING WHAT’S PASSING AS GREY MATTER! BLOODY GOOF!!
.
Please!

John Cressman (profile) says:

Lesson learned?

Maybe the lesson learned is… don’t yell fire in a theater and don’t joke about committing multiple felonies?

Sorry, you want to be stupid… you attract stupid.

In this insane, politically correct, politically charged environment, sometimes, it’s best to keep your freedom of the speech to yourself.

While I might joke like that to someone I know well, I wouldn’t joke about doing something very illegal to people I don’t know.

Know your audience. In this case, with Twitter, your audience is the ENTIRE FREAKING WORLD.

Mike Masnick (profile) says:

Re: Lesson learned?

Maybe the lesson learned is… don’t yell fire in a theater and don’t joke about committing multiple felonies?

Really? It was a joke. An obvious joke. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

Sorry, you want to be stupid… you attract stupid.

It wasn’t stupid, it was funny.

In this insane, politically correct, politically charged environment, sometimes, it’s best to keep your freedom of the speech to yourself.

No, that’s ridiculous. Encouraging chilling effects and self-censorship is ridiculous.

While I might joke like that to someone I know well, I wouldn’t joke about doing something very illegal to people I don’t know.

That’s fine for you. But don’t think because you have some ridiculous rules to censor yourself that everyone else should do the same.

JOHN MAYOR says:

Re: Re: Re: Poe's Law

TRUMPIAN PEDOPHILIA: OR HIDDEN PAEDO_(EROTOPHONOPHILIA) APOCALPSE
.
Given James Comey’s declaration that there was/ is nothing further to be pursued re Hillary Clinton’s emails– and, most notably, involving charges!– the offerings at URL, http://yournewswire.com/nypd-hillary-clinton-child-sex-scandal/, would NOT ONLY appear to be “FAKE NEWS”, BUT– ALSO!– the ravings of a S-O-C-I-O-P-S-Y-C-H-O-P-A-T-H, and deserving of IMMEDIATE REDRESS by the FBI!… and!… is in clear violation of the following…
.
FEDERAL STALKING STATUTE (18 U.S.C. §2261A)
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The abovenoted statute makes it a F-E-L-O-N-Y for someone to use any interactive computer service, or electronic communication service or system (the FBI, CIA, NSA, or otherwise!… and e.g., http://yournewswire.com/nypd-hillary-clinton-child-sex-scandal/ ) with the intent to kill, injure, HARASS, INTIMIDATE, or place under surveillance (through an official and/ or an unofficial proxy!) with the intent to kill, injure, HARASS, OR INTIMIDATE another person, and engage in a course of conduct that places a person in reasonable fear of death, or serious bodily injury, OR CAUSES, ATTEMPTS TO CAUSE, OR WOULD REASONABLY BE EXPRECTED TO CAUSE SUBSTANTIAL EMOTIONAL DISTRESS (NOT TO MENTION, A COMPROMISE OF AN ELECTION PROCESS!)!
.
(PLEASE NOTE: IN ANY FAILURE OF THE FBI TO HOLD THE AFORENOTED URL/ BLOGGER TO ACCOUNT, ONE MUST BE H-I-G-H-L-Y D-I-S-T-R-U-S-T-F-U-L– Y-E-A, S-U-S-P-I-C-I-O-U-S!– OF A-N-Y POLICE AGENCY THAT WOULD DIRECTLY, AND/ OR INDIRECTLY MARGINALIZE THE THREAT THAT SUCH POSES TO AMERICAN CITIZENS!!… LET ALONE, TO HILLARY CLINTON!! AND!… A FAILURE TO GO AFTER SUCH AS THAT AS AFORENOTED, WOULD– S-H-O-U-L-D!– COMPEL THE QUESTIONS: WHO WAS/ IS BEHIND SUCH A REPORT?… AND!… IS THERE A-N-Y V-E-R-A-C-I-T-Y TO THE REPORT? AND RE THE LATTER QUESTION!… A-N-Y I-N-D-I-C-A-T-I-O-N TOWARD THE A-F-F-I-R-M-A-T-I-V-E, WOULD SUBJECT THE VERY F-B-I TO CROSS-EXAMINATION, RE C-O-M-P-L-I-C-I-T-Y I-N F-E-L-O-N-I-O-U-S C-R-I-M-E-S! THAT IS TO SAY!… AND IN THAT EVENT!… IF THERE IS, INDEED, ANY “U-N-T-R-A-M-M-E-L-E-D A-N-D U-N-T-A-I-N-T-E-D” FEDERAL POLICING AUTHORITY LEFT STANDING IN AMERICA, THAT WOULD BE ABLE TO ADDRESS SUCH FELONIOUS CONDUCT, BY WAY OF THE FBI!!)
.
In Romans, Chapter 13: 1-3, Christians– in particular (but, not exclusively!)!– are to be subject to that which is in authority! And!… the PARAMOUNT AUTHORITY within a democratic country (at least!), is a country’s respective National Constitution!… AND, WHICH– INVARIABLY!– CONTAINS RIGHTS, AND FREEDOMS! And so!… for the blogger within this abovenoted URL to resist such!… and in keeping with Romans 13: 1-3!… IS TO RESIST GOD’S COMMAND, AND AUTHORITY!… AND, HIS HOLY SPIRIT!!
.
Furthermore!… Proverbs 6: 16-19 [NIV] states…
.
16) There are six things the Lord hates… seven, that are D-E-T-E-S-T-A-B-L-E to him:…
.
17) 1. Haughty eyes,
.
2. A lying tongue,
.
3. Hands that shed innocent blood,
.
18) 4. A heart that devises wicked schemes,
.
5. Feet that are quick to rush into evil,
.
19) 6. A false witness who pours out lies,
.
7. A-N-D A P-E-R-S-O-N W-H-O S-T-I-R-S U-P C-O-N-F-L-I-C-T I-N T-H-E C-O-M-M-U-N-I-T-Y. [NIV]
.
To sum up… now that the matter of Clinton’s emails would appear to have been resolved, what we’re now left with, are a series of Internet media reports, which reveal amassed evidence concerning the complicit involvement of Donald Trump, in CHILD ABUSE/ R-A-P-E!… and as indicated in the info– i-r-o-n-i-c-a-l-l-y, coincidentally, or serendipitously!– at, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-bloom/why-the-new-child-rape-ca_b_10619944.html… and… http://www.deathandtaxesmag.com/306274/trump-court-date-set-jane-doe-child-rape-lawsuit/… and… https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2016/oct/12/donald-trump-jeffrey-epstein-alleged-rape-lawsuit… and… http://www.inquisitr.com/3597538/donald-trumps-underage-rape-accusations-could-be-the-deathbed-of-his-political-aspirations/… and… http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-elections/donald-trump-rape-sexual-assault-claims-court-republican-party-us-presidential-florida-a7360636.html… and… http://theproudliberal.org/sworn-testimony-from-trump-rape-case-finally-released-looks-bad-for-trump/ ! And, the which– and despite Trump’s SET court date for December 16!– should compel an IMMEDIATE INVESTIGATION by the FBI, into these CHILD ABUSE/ R-A-P-E allegations (and, regardless of the said withdrawal of the allegation of RAPE by the alleged victim, on November the 4th!… due to said fears for her life!)!… and!… if need be!… Donald Trump’s ARREST!! Simply put!… either this alleged victim is held to account for propagating “FAKE NEWS (YEA, C-R-I-M-I-N-A-L M-I-S-C-H-I-E-F!… A-T L-E-A-S-T!)” by way of her testimony (and a testimony, incidentally, reportedly backed up by other witnesses!)!… or Trump should be held to account before a CRIMINAL COURT of law! There can be NO MORATORIUM regarding an allegation of C-H-I-L-D A-B-U-S-E/ C-H-I-L-D R-A-P-E!!… and, which has been said re numerous other CHILD ABUSE allegations! And!… if an American state would contend that there is such a MORATORIUM, then there’s a clear case for a Constitutional challenge re DUE PROCESS under the 5th Amendment, and a case of a denial of EQUAL PROTECTION under the 14th Amendment! In other words, Trump can’t hide behind a state’s claim that a state-legislated MORATORIUM holds sway over DUE PROCESS and EQUAL PROTECTION!! But also!… no one making such a claim (and given the seriousness of same!), should be held blameless if such a claim is PROVEN to be false!… and so, N-E-C-E-S-S-I-T-A-T-I-N-G FBI involvement, and a court’s determination (one way, or another!)!
.
Furthermore, we may very well find that the T-R-U-E R-E-A-S-O-N this character became involved in this race at this time, was to H-I-D-E from these allegations within the “smoke screen” of a Federal Presidential Election!… and!… I-N T-H-E G-U-I-S-E O-F S-E-R-V-I-N-G H-I-S C-O-U-N-T-R-Y! And… honestly!… I wouldn’t put it past this “huxster” and “hustler” to have “played” the RNC, America, and his alleged RAPE VICTIM (and her family!), in order to escape the “cuffs of justice”!!
.
Simply put!… if what is alleged of Donald Trump is T-R-U-E, THEN THIS “PRESIDENT TO-BE”, S-H-O-U-L-D N-O-T H-O-L-D O-F-F-I-C-E!! I-N-D-E-E-D!… N-O P-R-E-S-I-D-E-N-T-I-A-L W-A-N-N-A_B-E U-N-D-E-R S-U-C-H A C-L-O-U-D, S-H-O-U-L-D B-E E-N-T-I-T-L-E-D T-O B-E I-N T-H-E W-H-I-T-E H-O-U-S-E! AND TRUMP SHOULD HAVE BEEN– AND SHOULD BE NOW!– C-O-M-P-E-L-L-E-D T-O S-T-E-P D-O-W-N!! Unless… and of course!… the reports that Huffington Post (and MANY others!) have been publicizing, are all “FAKE NEWS”, and created by “Ghost Writers”!… and!… but further examples of “NETTROLLICIDE”!!
.
In addition to what may be true or bogus in a host of reports flying around the Net that Netizens (and American voters!) should have been– but, should be!– in arms about pertaining to the once candidates in this now nigh past U.S. Federal Election (save, for the meeting of the Electors on December 19, and the meeting of Congress on January 6, 2017!), we can add this previously cited “CRIMINAL TALE” involving Hillary Clinton, to the list (though, I’m inclined to view the reports about Trump, as ACCURATE!)! Freedom of the Press is one thing!… but!… Freedom to create HAVOC through “FAKE NEWS”, is quite another!! And it’s this HAVOC!… this attempted NETTROLLICIDE (if proven to be so!)!… that the FBI is– apparently!– NOW honing in on!!… and attempting to end!! Although!… and despite the veracity of the evidence pertaining to Trump reported by the Huffington Post (among others!), the NECESSARY INVESTIGATION concerning the allegations involving Donald Trump, have yet to be given as much consideration as the “reports” of “FAKE NEWS”!!
.
And, last of all… GALATIANS 6: 7, states… “Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked (BUT NOTE THE ENSUING, LUKE 10: 16!). Whatever a man sows, he will reap in return.” [NIV]
.
Luke 10: 16, states… “Whoever listens to you (a Christian Messenger!) listens to Me (Jesus Christ!); whoever rejects you (a Christian Messenger!) rejects Me (Jesus Christ!); but whoever rejects Me (Jesus Christ!) rejects Him who sent Me (GOD!)! [NIV]
.
And Matthew 25: 40, states… “And the King answering, will say to them, “Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of the least of these brothers of Mine (E.G., ABUSING A CHILD; FAILING TO ADHERE TO ROMANS 13: 1-3; AND, FAILING TO ADHERE TO A COUNTRY’S GODLY INSPIRED PARAMOUNT LAW, AND LESSER LAWS, IN REGARD TO THE NEEDS OF ONE OF THE LEAST OF THOSE OF CHRIST!), you did it to M-E.” [Berean Literal Bible]
.
Please!… no emails!

Anonymous Coward says:

Re: Re:

Yes, it should be looked into. But if I tweeted, “Yo, what’s up my peeps, I just knoked ova the Bank America in Greenfield last night, got mad money now!”, wouldn’t you expect the FBI would start the investigation by checking to see if a robbery actually happened first, rather than bringing in the ‘suspect’?

A little basic sleuthing to see if the thing was even plausible before we try to get a denial out of a person might be nice… but then again, that takes work… and thinking.

thejynxed (profile) says:

A funny joke presented in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

This election cycle has had hackles raised even more than normal across the political spectrum and people thought making jokes about committing Federal-level felony acts in a public arena in this sort of climate was a good idea? There is stupid and then there is stupid (Maybe they weren’t aware that tearing up absentee ballots at the Post Office carries a fine and jail sentence that would make the music industry blush with how modest their punishment proposals have been).

Keep it among you and your friends.

Oninoshiko (profile) says:

Really?

Considering the how often I hear reports of boxes of votes getting found during a recount (seems like this comes up every year), and the people working at the polling stations are just run-of-the-mill public (at my polling station, I recognised one of the staff, because she’s also a waitress at a restaurant I frequent, such is life in a small-town), I don’t find following up on someone saying they were tampering with votes to be that bad. This agent got a report of a crime, followed up, and checked it out.

TL;DNR: Good job FBI.

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