TSA Now Searching Valet-Parked Vehicles, Utilizing A Crack Security Team Composed Of… Valets
from the omfg-wtf-tsa dept
Update: The TSA tells us that this claim below was a false report. Instead, they say each airport is responsible for their own security plan, and this was just how this airport conducted some of its security. That said, they also admit that the plans are “approved by the TSA.” Still, it’s entirely possible that it was wrong to flat out pin this on the TSA — though it does seem legit to claim that this came about due to the culture of paranoia and suspicion that the TSA seems to encourage.
The TSA apparently has too many Fourth Amendment-violating irons in the fire, what with having to perform random searches in bus stops and on federal highways in addition to the bang-up job they do everyday ensuring that plane-boarding procedures are a fine blend of the ridiculous and the sublimely annoying. Now, the TSA has extended its reach once more, and it’s leaning on private individuals to search other private individuals parked cars.
Laurie Iacuzza walked to her waiting car at the Greater Rochester International Airport after returning from a trip and that’s when she found it — a notice saying her car was inspected after she left for her flight. She said, “I was furious. They never mentioned it to me when I booked the valet or when I picked up the car or when I dropped it off.”
Iacuzza’s car was inspected by valet attendants on orders from the TSA.
Take note of that, America. Your safety can only be guaranteed by a search of valet-parked vehicles, but not by a trained agent. Instead, your valet will do a brief search of your vehicle to ensure there’s nothing inside the cabin, trunk or under the hood that looks like a bomb. (Like, for instance, a bundle of wires and some other stuff with a post-it attached saying, “NOT A BOMB.”)
There’s probably not any Fourth Amendment violating going on here. After all, the crack team of valet/security experts aren’t authorized to dig through any of the really “secret” areas.
The report stated that the inspection involves looking into the trunk and engine and a “scan” of the inside of the car, which does not include opening the glove compartment or the console.
Granted, the cabin of the vehicle isn’t really “private,” but digging around in someone’s trunk usually requires a warrant or reasonable suspicion. And I don’t think I can stress this enough, but YOUR VALET is performing this warrantless, suspicionless search.
But is that the extent of vehicles being searched at airports?
[W]hy only valet parked cars? That’s what News10NBC wanted to ask the TSA director about. We reached him by phone.
Berkeley Brean asked, “Are the cars in the short term lots and long term lots getting searched as well?”
John McCaffery, TSA, said, “No, those vehicles that are in the garage, short term long term parking, even if they carry pretty large amounts of explosives, they would not cause damage to the front of the airport. But for those who use the valet, the car could be there for a half hour or an hour so there is a vulnerability.”
Well, that almost seems smart, except that cars waiting for a free valet/human bomb detector aren’t the only vehicles lingering in front of airports, as J.D. Tucille at Reason points out.
If the TSA is truly worried about car bombs at the curb, all of those private vehicles and taxis making drop-offs and pickups would seem to be of equal concern to cars left with a valet.
His guess is that the TSA does it because it has “nominal consent,” thanks to a sign posted at the valet window that announces valet-parked vehicles will be searched per TSA orders. Except that Iacuzza claims no sign was posted when she dropped off her vehicle and the valet agency refused to state when the sign was actually posted.
I think it goes farther than nominal consent. Whether or not it makes sense to search vehicles parked for more than X minutes in front of the airport (it doesn’t — at least if you’re not searching non-valet-parked vehicles) is beside the point. Vehicles left for valets to park present both access and opportunity, two aspects our nation’s security agencies never let go to waste.
The valet is going to be inside the vehicle to park it. That’s a given. No expectation of privacy in terms of the interior of the vehicle. The attendant can also pop the hood once inside. Accessing the trunk may take a key or may have an interior release, but either way, the attendant has everything he or she needs to do a quick and dirty “search.” A car waiting for a valet is a Christmas present for the TSA, which clearly has a jones to search as many forms of transport as possible.
And if you don’t consent? Well, I suppose you’re stuck parking your own car bomb at short-term or long-term parking where it can detonate in peace.
But don’t worry, it could be worse. The DHS has noted that in cases of heightened security alerts, the TSA can randomly search any vehicle it wants to. Pushing this job to valets just sounds like the TSA would rather avoid more confrontations with pissed off travelers. Beyond that though, it just seems incredibly shitty to put untrained valets in potentially dangerous situations. You know, unless no one, not even the TSA, really believes anyone’s leaving cars loaded with explosives at valet parking.
Update: J.D. Tucille reports that the TSA has responded to his queries with a noncommittal statement:
“Each airport authority, along with their state and local law enforcement partners, is responsible for securing airport property, including the outer perimeter.”
Sounds like cans being kicked down the road. Tucille adds:
Suffice it to say, as you can tell from the official statement emphasizing airport authorities and local agencies, TSA doesn’t want to take credit for the car searches at Rochester’s airport. Also, I think it’s a safe bet that Laurie Iacuzza, and anybody else who left cars with valets at the airport before this story broke, was very likely not properly informed that their vehicles would be searched.
Looks like some improper searches have been occurring at the Greater Rochester International Airport. And if the TSA didn’t give the go-ahead for these search-and-park maneuvers, whoever whipped up the sign and the notice left in Iacuzza’s vehicle will need to do a bit of explaining.
Filed Under: airports, parked cars, security, security theater, tsa, valet
Comments on “TSA Now Searching Valet-Parked Vehicles, Utilizing A Crack Security Team Composed Of… Valets”
No, those vehicles that are in the garage, short term long term parking, even if they carry pretty large amounts of explosives, they would not cause damage to the front of the airport. But for those who use the valet, the car could be there for a half hour or an hour so there is a vulnerability.
That’s gotta be one of the most half-assed, retarded justification I have ever heard. With enough explosives and parking it as close as possible they can take entire blocks with a single boom. Although I think this explanation is more acceptable than “it’s just some random whim of our megalomaniac bosses”.
Beyond that though, it just seems incredibly shitty to put untrained valets in potentially dangerous situations.
The chances of finding a bomb ANYWHERE within an airport based on historical events are way below 1%. Now if you count the number of cars that go through daily and the numbers of car-bombs that exploded in airport areas in the entirety of human history the chances are even smaller. But supposing the guy finds a bomb what will he do? Call for mommy? Sounds like the TSA wants to spare their agents from explosions!
And now I have this sudden urge of making a bomb all decorated with party themes and leave in a car while delivering it to a valet with a big sign attached to it: THIS IS A BOMB!
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someone just got on a list..
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On the list? Shit, Techdirt alone has posted several stories recently of people actually being tossed in the clink for sometimes months on end for making statement like that.
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I wouldn’t take the “nice” car to the airport and park it; I’d take my P-O-S car. Which is, in other words, a bomb. Synonymous with a lemon, a junker, a “station car”. Guess I’d better stop calling it that.
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“Bom,Bom,Bom bedee bomb, bomb, bomb! Fuck those fascist Dicks! Bomb. Bomb. Fucking bomb bedeeeeeeee BBBBBB BOOOOOOOMB!” (That is all. Thank you Free Speech& Fuck you very much the Fascist regime) {Don’t let them intimidate you to change one syllable} Cheers!
Psssst?
“BOMB!’….’BAAAAMMM!”
;+)
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TSA training session for valets:
Instructor: You spot a bomb in the vehicle, and the timer goes off in 15 mins. What will be your immediate action?
Valet: I’ll exit the vehicle and inform my supervisor immediately.
Instructor: If you cannot locate the supervisor?
Valet: I’ll dial 911.
Instructor: If the police cannot send immediate assistance?
Valet: Run like hell and call Bob.
Instructor: Bob?
Valet: My neighbour ! I’ll need him to place some put options on a couple of airlines.
valet key
Now I understand why my car came with a valet key. That key could not open the glove compartment or the trunk. Valet keys will have to outlawed now like real locks on luggage.
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The TSA searched our bags when we transitted through JFK airport.
They didn’t re-lock the case (which was very nice of them), fortunately nothing went missing but I am never flying through the USA again.
I have a third party willing to strip-search and dismantle the entire DHS. (except the Coast Guard and a skeleton crew of customs.) Based on standard practices and interpretations, since they’re a third party, they’re not accountable or prosecutable for Wanton Contempt of Oligarchy.
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I don’t think anybody is proposing that. I am in favor of dismantling the DHS, but that doesn’t mean dismantling the agencies that the DHS had consumed. The secret service would still exist, it would just be as it was before the DHS existed.
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Where the historically oppressed still yell “Fuck the cops” those who will be joining the oppressed begin to yell “Fuck the DHS.”
Valet
Do you really rely on the valet for proper placement of your airport-destroying device?
Isn’t it a little more precise to drive the vehicle to the proper place in front of the airport drop-off and pick-up, park in the white zone, lock the vehicle, and walk away from it? Are the terrorist concerned about the ticket, or that the effeciency of the towing service at the airport is going to foil their plot?
Re: Valet
A terrorist may book valet service, and if not a suicide bomber, will set a timer to give themselves enough time to get away, almost certainly with a backup detonator on the ignition or door. That is they will arrange for the bomb to go boom before the car can be moved.
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Even if that is the case, why bother with the valet? There seems to be no reason to actually leave the keys or leave the vehicle unlocked.
Pull up, park next to the curb illegally, and walk away. Why the heck would you first give someone the keys? People park illegally and get towed all the time – wouldn’t a switch that sets off the bomb when the car is tilted by the tow truck be the best thing you could use?
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Tilt switch is a good idea, as is booking valet service as the car gets on a list of cars that can be parked out front.
How would this work?
Can anyone explain where in the valet process it would be possible for this to be effective.
I’m poor/cheap and don’t get valet parking at the airport, so perhaps I don’t fully understand the process. Here is what I think it looks like:
1) I drive to the airport and find the most convenient door for me to park
2) I get out of the car, gather my luggage, and hand my keys to the valet to take my car
3) He gives me something that indicates that they have my car and which car it is
4) He gets into the car, and drives it away to some undisclosed location – tucking it safely away under a pipe leaking some kind of sap/rust hybrid fluid that is going to eat the paint off of my hood
5) I return to the airport after my trip
6) I argue with someone about my missing luggage
7) I find the nearest exit where there is a nice valet employee with a radio and hand him my ticket
8) He calls someone at the hidden location who gets into my car and drives it to me waiting at the curb
9) I get into the car and leave
So, assuming they don’t search the car in front of me when I hand him the keys, the first opportunity to search it is after the vehicle has left the critically-important location and is in a garage location presumably a long distance from the airport and surrounded by concrete.
The only other opportunity I have to detonate my bomb is when I am standing at the curb and the bomb is delivered back to me after my trip has been completed. At this point, since i am now a suicide bomber, wouldn’t it be more effective for the bomb to be in my suitcase so I can simply wheel it into the concourse and detonate it in front of the check-in counter?
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and THATS why the TSA will soon be employing the homeless to run at you, snatch your bags, check them by dumping your clothes all over the ground and signalling that everything’s A-OK by running away whilst defecating in their trousers.
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Whilst the above post seems stupid and/or retarded, it’s actually not much worse than the stuff the TSA actually does.
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Isn’t that what they do at the security check?
Hopefully these Valets are carefully vetted and none of them feel tempted to vindictively leave a bomb in your trunk.
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Our government is EXTREMELY careful about properly vetting the contractors they use to ensure none of them will ever violate their procedures or disclose sensitive information.
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I see what you did there.
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or bodily fluids…
There, fixed that for you. 🙂
How is this not illegal?
I mean, beyond even the obvious 4th amendment violation, how is it legal to have a non-government agent search someone else’s car?
Re: How is this not illegal?
The police can enlist the help of a third party to gather evidence. They do this all the time (confidential informant wearing a wire).
However, any agent they designate is also bound by the same search restrictions that the police have. In this case, however, since the TSA apparently has no restrictions and does not need to abide by the 4th amendment, they can tell anyone they want to search something.
Valet keys
My car has a valet key, which is what I give to valets. It unlocks the doors and starts the car, but does not unlock the trunk or any interior compartments.
So what happens if I use the valet service at the airport? When they find they can’t open the trunk, are they authorized to force it open like they do with luggage?
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Mercedes-Benz.
It’s a German car.
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As does mine, but there’s a lock on it and it can’t be used when the lock is engaged. It takes the actual, non-valet car key to unlock it.
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I have a VW with this feature as well. You can lock the glove box, the swing down backseats (to the trunk) and also the trunk releases (both internal and external ones) with the ignition key, but the valet key will not unlock any of them them.
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I have a Nissan Altima and the key is a fob with a key that inserts into it. The ignition is a push start so you only need the fob to start it. Inside the glove box there is a button that disables the trunk releases so when you flip that switch the button on the dash, button on the fob, and proximity button on the trunk itself are disabled. Then you lock the glove box and backseat release button with the physical key.
You take the key with you and give them the fob. They can drive the car, but cannot open the glove box or the trunk without using force and causing damage to the car.
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The valet may drive your car into a concrete wall. At which point the wreck will be hauled off to the police impound lot?and all of the contents will be inventoried, according to standard police inventory procedures.
Better give the valet the non-defective key. Concrete walls are much less likely to jump out in front of your car when all the equipment is in well-functioning order.
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I disagree. If they want to search my car that much, then I’ll be very happy to let them buy me a new one to replace the one they totaled.
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Your insurance company can fight with their insurance company over that.
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If my car has a comprehensive policy, then my insurance company will replace it, and they can have that fight. I still get a new car.
If my car does not have a comprehensive policy, then I’d just sue the valet service directly.
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What does the valet service have to do with it? The guy who was driving your car was working for the feds at the moment the concrete wall jumped out in front of your defective vehicle!
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No, he was working for the valet service. The valet service told him to search my car (on orders from the feds). But all that is an irrelevant distinction for this sort of thing since nobody told him to crash my car into the wall — in fact, the valet service’s insurance company very probably told him not to.
Michael Hastings
I wonder if Michael used a similar type of valet service before his crash?
Stupid!
Not saying I’m a terrorist, but wouldn’t letting a valet park your bomb-equipped car be like absolute last on your list of good strategies?
So, what exactly does the TSA hope to accomplish here? Sounds like so much fishing to me.
Interestingly, this is one of the few airports that doesn’t employ TSA screeners (they use a private contractor instead)
I imagine whatever poor sap the TSA assigned to “Oversee” the airport got bored because he didn’t have anyone to order around, and thought up a new way to illegally search private property.
So you work at valet parking, probably not the best paying job, you dont like this new part of the job some manic DHS agent has come up with, or the potential risk to life or limb with no extra money in compensation, do you refuse the extra duty, do you just do this potentially dangerous job,
or are you some dodgy character that will use the opportunity to check out the boot to see if there is really any stuff of value there.
Since you work in a country where concern for personal safety in the work place can mean the sack. Do you just say you did the search. Do you leave a note behind. (in a sort of CYA moment)
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Does the valet parking insurance cover the liability?
Valets have been searching cars for years. The only difference now is that the TSA has made it legal.
Mission creep at its finest.
This government is totally out of control. I’m not sure what it is going to take to get control of it again but it’s high time we started seeking solutions.
All it takes is one exploded valet parking assistant for the entire lot of them to refuse to check the trunk.
– if terrorists were REALLY afraid of some low-paid flunky that’s all they’d need to do….
well, that or get an inside-man to plant lots of IEDs into everyones car and detonate them simultaneously three weeks down the line…..
No stranger will be inside my car and park it. They can go frell themselves. Nobody parks my car but me.
So what do they do...
…if you give them your valet key which does not open the trunk!