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1.  

   HI BILLY MAYS HERE AGAIN FOR TECHDIRT.

   

   Fake Billy Mays, Aug 20th, 2009 @ 1:41pm

   
   

   YOU'VE HEARD ME EARIER IN THE WEEK, BUT NOW THERE'S ANOTHER AMAZING OFFER!
   
   IF YOU'RE IN THE BAY AREA, BE SURE TO ORDER NOW AND WE'LL DOUBLE THE OFFER! DENNIS YANG ALSO NEEDS HIS DESK CLEANED. BRING TWO BOXES, A FEATHER DUSTER, VACUUM, HELP CLEAN SOME DESKS, AND WE'LL SEND YOU YOUR CHOICE OF TWO MYSTERY BOOKS, A HOODIE, OR A CREDIT TO BUY A CD'S WORTH OF SONGS ON ITUNES OR AMAZON FROM OUR AMAZING MUSIC CLUB. THIS OFFER ONLY APPLIES TO BAY-AREA RESIDENTS, AND IS FOR A LIMITED TIME, SO ACT NOW.
   
   DON'T DELAY CALL TODAY!

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2.  

   Ahem

   

   Dark Helmet (profile), Aug 20th, 2009 @ 1:44pm

   
   

   When does the "I, for one, welcome our new helmeted overlord" Tshirt bearing my signature get released?
   
   Not that I'd get one for myself, but I've been having this fantasy about coming to bed and my girlfriend wearing it while lying in a skanky, some might say Cohen-esque pose....

   [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

3.  

   Silence Techdirt

   

   zaven (profile), Aug 20th, 2009 @ 2:27pm

   
   

   C'mon RIAA representatives. I know one of you can afford that silence Techdirt for a year promotion. I know I'd hate it if this site was gone for a year, but I don't think Mike would be complaining with that big fat check.

   [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

4.  

   Re: Silence Techdirt

   

   Anonymous Coward, Aug 20th, 2009 @ 2:30pm

   
   

   For 100 million, you could silence a whole bunch of the internet. After all, the posts are all public domain, so there isn't a whole bunch of value here!

   [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

5.  

   Re: Silence Techdirt

   

   Dark Helmet (profile), Aug 20th, 2009 @ 2:30pm

   
   

   "C'mon RIAA representatives. I know one of you can afford that silence Techdirt for a year promotion. I know I'd hate it if this site was gone for a year, but I don't think Mike would be complaining with that big fat check."
   
   Funny story actually, I understand that the RIAA wanted to utilize that option, but like with most of their artists, they couldn't figure out where to send the check...

   [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

6.  

   Re: Re: Silence Techdirt

   

   Dark Helmet (profile), Aug 20th, 2009 @ 2:31pm

   
   

   "After all, the posts are all public domain, so there isn't a whole bunch of value here!"
   
   Way to completely confuse price and value, moron...

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7.  

   

   Anonymous Coward, Aug 20th, 2009 @ 2:40pm

   
   

   baaaa-baaaa, come on sheep! Cue up for a shearing.

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8.  

   Re:

   

   Dark Helmet (profile), Aug 20th, 2009 @ 2:43pm

   
   

   "baaaa-baaaa, come on sheep! Cue up for a shearing."
   
   Yeah! Cue up for a shearing! Then we can go play pool with our queue sticks.
   
   Idiot.

   [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

9.  

   Re: Re:

   

   Not RD., Aug 20th, 2009 @ 7:46pm

   
   

   fucktard.

   [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

10.  

    Re: Re:

    

    Anonymous Coward, Aug 20th, 2009 @ 8:18pm

    
    

    >>Then we can go play pool with our queue sticks.
    
    Queue Sticks? You are a dolt, sir. I bet you play with a granny stick.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

11.  

    Re: Re: Re:

    

    Chargone (profile), Aug 20th, 2009 @ 9:10pm

    
    

    .... did you seriously miss what he did there?
    because if you did, this comment makes you look a lot worse than it does him :D

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12.  

    Re: Re: Re:

    

    Dark Helmet (profile), Aug 21st, 2009 @ 4:52am

    
    

    "Queue Sticks? You are a dolt, sir. I bet you play with a granny stick."
    
    Allow me to quote:
    
    “Wit is so shining a quality that everybody admires it; most people aim at it, all people fear it, and few love it unless in themselves. A man must have a good share of wit himself to endure a great share of it in another.” - Lord Chesterfield.
    
    Guess which way you fall in that last sentence there, sparky...

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

13.  

    Re: Re: Re: Re:

    

    President Skroob (profile), Aug 21st, 2009 @ 9:43am

    
    

    What is this? Helmet, are you talking about me again? You know I play with a Granny Stick.

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

14.  

    Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:

    

    Dark Helmet (profile), Aug 21st, 2009 @ 10:08am

    
    

    Bwhahahahaha! Am I really inspiring more Spaceball character profiles? That's fantastic.
    
    "Granny Stick."
    
    That's the sort of thing an idiot would use to carry around his luggage!

    [ reply to this | link to this | view in thread ]

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