Microsoft Wants A Patent For Saying 'Goodbye'
from the bye-now dept
theodp writes "Demonstrating its commitment to high-quality U.S. patents, Microsoft has submitted a just-published patent application to the USPTO for Automatic Goodbye Messages. By automatically sending messages like 'Have a great afternoon!', 'Sorry, I have got to go!', 'Have a terrific day!', 'Ciao, Harry!', or even a simple 'Bye!' at the end of an IM session, Microsoft explains, one avoids insulting a converser with whom a conversation is ended. Hopefully the USPTO will give this one the quick buh-bye it deserves."
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Been done by Jesse McNelis on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 2:49am
ummm..irc clients have had this for decades.
Prior art, pointless application.
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by Anonymous Coward on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 3:23am
Keep walking... just another monopoly trying to gain an obscene patent so they can get more money...
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buh-bye by Anon on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 3:55am
So let me see, this is a VERY obvious idea, it has prior art...Should get a patent no problem then.
Problem is, I'm not joking.
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the sad thing is... by Wolfger on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 4:48am
...it took this long for an IM client to do something every IRC client I have ever used has always done.
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Now to patent the next obvious idea... by Deirdre on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 5:20am
To really duplicate IRC, after the client says "goodbye," the receiving client should say, "would you please turn that stupid script off?"
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Re: Now to patent the next obvious idea... by Anonymous Coward on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 5:30am
LOL. My feelings exactly. Nothing says 'I care' like a computer generated goodbye.
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Microsoft Deserves an Orwell Award for Newspeak by Steve R. on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 5:39am
Mr. Smith ("Microsoft Calls for Reforms to the U.S. Patent System") newspeak continues to further establish Microsoft's reputation for butchering the English language.
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Re: Re: Now to patent the next obvious idea... by Anonymous Coward on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 5:39am
I own the patent for LOL you must cease and desist all usage, and pay me 1,000 for each infringing usage.
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Insult by Commander Koen on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 6:48am
An automatic bye would insult me more than no bye at all.(reply to this comment) (link to this comment)
How companies come up with some of these patents by Adam on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 7:02am
Many of you wouldn't criticise Microsoft and other companies if you knew the delicate and timely process it takes to come up with these patents. *Take 2 college students (not necesarily particularly bright ones), *Provide them a writing pad, and 2 #2 pencils (Must be #2 pencils) *Give them a few joints, and allow 30 minutes to "Bake". *Ask them to write down 100 of the most obvious things that are done today. Company X then painstakinly goes over this list, looking for blatantly obvious statements that they do themselves. Search for an existing patent and if none exists, WAMO! They're in business. It sadens me that many of you mock the system and just don't full understand and appreciate this time tested complex method.
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Hello! by Jeff on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 7:09am
They should add "Hello" to the patent list, since you obviously don't want to offend or upset anyone at the beginning of the IM session...
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The inevitable evolution of this technology... by W.B. McNamara on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 7:13am
[22:11] foo: blah blah blah blah
[22:11] bar: hey, I'm trying to get some work done here
[22:12] foo: yeah, i know but blah blah blah blah
[22:12] foo: i mean seriously, blah blah blah blah
[22:12] bar: IM IN YR IM SESSION TERMINATING YR CONVERSATION
[22:12] bar: KTHXBYE
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Re: Hello! by Anonymous Coward on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 7:13am
Too late, I've already patented that.
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Thomas Edison Never Got a Microsoft Goodbye by Bald Pate-NT on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 7:31am
These patents shouldn't be classified in the same legal structure as innovation. If a patent is hilarious, it should be put in a different stack.
If anything, they could be allowed simply to prevent big corporate targets from massive, frivolous, infringement liability.
Creatively-stoned college students just don't have the legal resources to file and defend their originality. Or the time--where does it go? Microsoft's crazy baldheads are getting chased out of town anyway.
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IRC already had, but..... by byte^me on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 7:36am
While I agree that IRC has had this feature for years, you are missing one serious problem - who at the USPTO is going to have any clue what IRC *IS*, let alone that clients already offered this feature?
Because of that, I would not be surprised if this is approved. It would be another example of the shining stupidity of government bureaucracy......
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Re: Insult by Chuck Norris' Enemy (deceased) on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 8:30am
Yeah! The folks on CSI:Miami don't seem to care if they get hung up on at the end of a call without a courteous farewell.
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Re: Re: Re: Now to patent the next obvious idea... by InkChemist on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 8:47am
You want 1,000? How about 1,000 kicks to your pitiful posterior for be such an idiot?
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Patent reform by Mystified Mind on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 8:53am
How about this? All patent applications must be published and made openly available to the public for at least 180 days prior to review by patent reviewers in order to provide an adequate exposure of prior art.
Or, better yet, go back to requiring all applications to include a working model. No more theoretical crap. Prove your idea works.
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Why they do this... by Jon on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 9:29am
Microsoft, and most big companies for that matter, don't file patents to make money off of royalties, or to sue people who infringe on them so they can make a pretty penny in settlements. They file as many patents as possible so that no other companies sue them. Basically, Microsoft, and IBM and Google, and Cisco and all other big companies have a truce of some sort, "we won't sue you, so you don't sue us since we all have technology that infringes on each other's patents."
It's important for all of these companies to continually file new patents so that none of the companies get too far ahead of the other ones, and thus would have a leg up in a legal battle. Think of it like the cold war. And I'm serious -- this is why all these companies file for seemingly stupid patents all the time.
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If they made a patent for sarcasm .... by RichTreme on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 9:30am
most you would be screwed.
but then again sarcasm online doesnt work out as well.
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Wrong Career by Max Powers at http://ConsumerFight.com on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 10:55am
I new I should of grown up to be a Patent Attorney.
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Re: Wrong Career by Anonymous Coward on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 12:25pm
>>I new I should of grown up to be a Patent Attorney.
Nah, because as horrible as they may be, even the new ones knew which words to use get that far...
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SYNOPSIS by DMan on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 12:29pm
...Hello and Goodbye....nuff said!
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wow by Buzz on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 3:08pm
I am going to patent "void main". Everyone else is screwed.
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Re: If they made a patent for sarcasm .... by Anonymous Asian on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 3:48pm
sorry ... you have to pay me $1000 for sarcasm .. i own the patent on that
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Re: Why they do this... by Anonymous Coward on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 3:55pm
You've never heard of SCO?(reply to this comment) (link to this comment)
funny by ipanema on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 4:04pm
lol...Don't they have more important things to do at Microsoft than think about these ridiculous words to be patented? I guess we just have to make do with an emoticon with a hand wave if this will push through.
What's next on their agenda?
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Common Sense by Scott on Nov 7th, 2007 @ 5:16pm
I'm really amazed at how many people have their head up thier ass!
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Umm... can anyone say "AOL"??? by matt on Nov 8th, 2007 @ 1:55pm
Though it's been a dozen or more years since I used AOL to connect to the internet, something in the back of my mind keeps saying ..... 'goodbye.'
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Proposed Solution by MSfun on Nov 12th, 2007 @ 1:39am
I think Bill needs another pie on his face...He is looking so old these days...
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